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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ok so I posted earlier but I've now had to call the police...

295 replies

MeepMeepVrooom · 25/02/2014 17:14

I posted earlier about my ExH taking pictures from my FB page and putting them on his, he tagged his girlfriend of 2 weeks in them etc etc...

I have just been to pick up my DD from nursery to be told than a woman fitting his new girlfriends description tried to collect DD from nursery. They called me but I was already on my way and told them I would deal with it, they refused to release my DD (obviously) and waited on me.

She was gone by the time i got there and have called 101 once I was home.

This bizarre behaviour seems to be escalating and I'm getting worried. I know where the woman is right now and tbh I'm trying my best to stay calm and not go to her and go through her like a ton of bricks.

Has anyone been in this position? I'm really struggling to sit tight right now.

OP posts:
overitalready · 26/02/2014 15:38

Good luck Meep

yangsun · 26/02/2014 15:49

Just read this, shocking. Best of luck with it, I'm looking forward to hearing that you and your dd are safe.

SpottyDottie · 26/02/2014 15:52

Good luck Meep

Slainte · 26/02/2014 15:55

What an awful situation for you Meep. Hope everything goes well in court for you this afternoon.

PissesGlitter · 26/02/2014 16:00

I'm glad you are at your friends and have a hearing today

LurkingNineToFive · 26/02/2014 16:07

Im a bit scared for you OP. Lets just hope they have caught them with drugs or something unrelated but they cant tell you right now. Stay safe.

DinoSnores · 26/02/2014 16:13

Gosh. Sounds very hard. I was a bit confused why nursery wanted to see DD's birth certificate when she started but it makes a bit more sense now.

Doasbedoneby · 26/02/2014 16:13

Good to see the police and courts being quick off the mark.

Whereisegg · 26/02/2014 16:16

Just read, and I want to repeat the poster that asked if you have a passport for your dd?

As pp poster said, if you don't, get one and keep it safe, your mums maybe?

Good luck meep.

Original poster
MeepMeepVrooom · 26/02/2014 16:19

Hey ladies,

There was a bit of upheaval after my last post. The PSO hearing was brought forward and another hearing for a non-harassment order (for GF) was scheduled. That is the Scottish version of a non molestation order I've been told.

I'm happy to say both were granted although the PSO is an emergency order and will (now I might get a bit mixed up here) need referred to Cafcass and I will need to meet with them and it will at some point end up back in court for an extended order.

The two police officers from last night met us at the court and they have informed me that both ExH and GF have been cautioned for harassment (there has been a huge amount of background between ExH and myself which I have not put in this thread). There will be no charges as many of you have pointed out no "crime" per se has been committed. They are both still being questioned for unrelated matters and will be served with the orders at the police station. The police officer has said that ExH will be warned not to approach me for the time being and my solicitor has a view of further proceeding for a non-harassment order to be issued to ExH too. This will take longer because of the PSO but we will get there.

I'm afraid I'm not much further forward with why ExHs GF tried to collect my DD but presumably the fact there are to be no charges ExH has said he had given her permission or something.

You have all kept me calm(ish) since last night and have been given amazing advice. Thank you so much for your support.

OP posts:
Original poster
MeepMeepVrooom · 26/02/2014 16:20

Just to answer the passport question I do have a passport for DD and it's in a locked safe at home (the safe is bolted to the floor)

OP posts:
haveyourselfashandy · 26/02/2014 16:28

You have handled this amazingly and your dd is one very lucky little girl to have you as a mum!
I hope this gets sorted and you can both live your lives in peace.

Eatriskier · 26/02/2014 16:30

meep so glad you got your PSO and the other order against the gf. I doubt you'll ever really be given the answer as to why. I find it so odd when dads that refuse to have anything to do with their kids then pull stupid stunts like this, my mate had her kid's passport reported as stolen randomly despite the ex not having seen the kid for over a year.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 26/02/2014 16:30

This is great news OP. The orders you have got today will give you and your DD much great protection. It's usual for an emergency order to be granted initially with a view to extending it in future so that bit's fine. It's also good they can be served with the orders in the police station as there will be no question of them saying they haven't got them.

I wouldn't worry about why they've been arrested. There were probably stolen goods / drugs at the house when the police turned up yesterday. It's unlikely to be anything to do with your DD.

I would agree with others that getting a passport that you apply for is a good idea to stop your ex seeking to do so.

bibliomania · 26/02/2014 16:32

Well done - major progress!

really1234 · 26/02/2014 16:32

Glad the court hearing went to plan.

frumpypigskin · 26/02/2014 16:34

Well done. You've handled this brilliantly.

It sounds to me like there is something else going on with your ex and his new partner and you have been caught up in it.

I hope this is the last of it for you both.

MrsDeVere · 26/02/2014 16:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LadyFlumpalot · 26/02/2014 16:43

Phewf - nothing really to add except I'm in awe of how you have handled this.

Original poster
MeepMeepVrooom · 26/02/2014 16:45

I'm just glad the worst is done (hopefully)

I'm under strict instructions that we are staying with my friend until at least Fri (although he is pushing for Sunday) he's quite bossy and protective that way.

I'm lucky to have him and this nest of vipers in mine and DDs corner Grin

As soon as DD is in bed we're ordering copious amount of food and cracking open one or two bottles Wine

The nosey part of me wants to know what's going on but the relieved part of me doesn't give a shit. Although I may have mentioned to the police if they wanted to lock them up I'd chuck the keys for him.

OP posts:
AlpacaYourThings · 26/02/2014 16:46

Sounds like a fab evening Meep Smile

TimeToPassGo · 26/02/2014 16:47

Big relief for you Meep. Try and just relax now and spend some time with your lovely DD. You've been brilliant and you've probably been running on adrenalin but the shock may catch up with you now. Be kind to yourself Thanks

TimeToPassGo · 26/02/2014 16:48

X-posted. Food and Wine is the way to go Wink

fideline · 26/02/2014 16:48

Glad to hear it. Cheers Wine

Nicknacky · 26/02/2014 16:49

Can I just point out that if you are in Scotland ex then we don't have the caution system. They have possibly been warned about it.

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