To ask ex not to bring DD to McDonald's AGAIN

[Anonfornow00]

DD is only two, she'll be three in June.
She has been staying in the dads every Saturday night for the past 3 weeks, this is a new arrangement as I was fed up having his lazing around my home "visiting her"
We've really had a hard year of it, constant fighting and battling about everything but finally we just have no contact other than hello and goodbye on the Saturday and the same when he drops her back on Sunday and the peace from the arguments is fantastic!

However, I really don't know if IABU here, but every week she's come back with a McDonald's toy and I'd love to ask him when he's taking her tomorrow, not to take her there again at least for a little while.
Like she's only 2 years old I think a McDonald's once a week is a bit mad, plus what ever other rubbish he's giving her.

Have I got any right to kindly request this or am I being unreasonable?

Sorry, but YABU, she probably looks forward to it - once a week isn't going to hurt.

You can request all you like, he doesn't have to listen to you though. One a week isn't the end of the world. I might be tempted to pick my battles and leave the argument for something bigger that is bound to arise sooner or later...

For once a week I really wouldn't worry. Nuggets and chips or whatever every so often won't cause any problems really

I don't think you can say anything really, it is up to him what he does on his time.

I personally wouldn't rock the boat this early on. Its been three weeks, looks like it is going well. It may cause another argument (which may occur in front of your daughter at pick up time). I would rather "suck it up" that my child is having McDonalds once a week that her watching her parent's argue over it. Maybe later down the line when things are easier between you both. By then she will probably be asking for pizza express or some other place anyway. Best of luck with it all.

I would leave it tbh, as someone else said, pick your battles. I used to have tea at my dad's every Saturday and it was always the same (my choice): tinned lentil soup (Heinz) and pizza. Nutritionally surely no better than McD's but I have survived and look back on it quite fondly now!

I think it's up to him what he does, but shame he can't think of anything else but McDonalds!

I think that once a week is a lot.

Yabu. It's his daughter too. How would you feel if he said he wanted you to stop something you do with your dd?

I think you are being a bit unreasonable, sorry. A McDonalds is not a big deal, better to save kicking off with Ex for something worthwhile really.

So you are happy that the arguments have ended but you want to start another one?

Does he have the money for better places? Does he know where else he could go?

I think a McDonalds once a week is OK. What I don't think is OK is the assumption that he can give her a poor diet every weekend, secure in the knowledge that her mother will pick up the slack. It reminds me of my friend whose ex gives their 3 fast food/takeaway and loads of sweets EOW and doesn't tell them to do their homework because 'he wants to enjoy them'. If someone is going to get to feed the kids easy, quick, nutritionally poor convenience food then it should be the person who is giving them 18 meals out of every 21, not the person that is giving them 3.

As much as you feel that fast food is wrong and I sort of agree, some Dads really struggle to think of things to do with their kids. (even non divorced ones.) I would really let this one go...my kids loved McD and once a week, tho not ideal, is not going to do much serious harm.

She may well not be eating the actual meal - the lure of the toy is enough for my almost 3 year old. It's January, the weather is grim, it's only been a few weeks, I'd give it a few more weeks, see how it goes.

Yabu, it's not up to you to say what he does on his time. The alternative is ex dh and dd say at home and you go out

I'd be inclined to leave it for a bit too. I agree, it's not ideal but you can't really tell him what to do during contact. Maybe in a few weeks drop some gentle hints about how much she enjoys the library/swimming etc and when the weather is nicer he might start taking her to the park and things like that, anyway.

Macdonalds once a week isn't going to hurt? Seriously??

For a 2 year old? Do people really believe this!

Yanbu to say something to him, op, of course that is rubbish.

I am pmsl.

I admit to being slightly fussy about what my dc eat, but absolutely don't regard myself as a foodzilla or anything.

My dc get to eat in a fast food place maybe twice a year. They are 13 and 10.

Mintyy it is a bag of chips, not neat heroin injected into her eyeballs.

Obviously not, what a twattish post.

I'm with mintyy, but try to put it kindly!

I agree, it's far too often, and I would want to know if it's symptomatic of him generally giving her rubbish to eat. I would be very unhappy about his. I have no idea what you can do about it though.

Thanks for the replies everyone, really appreciate them!

It's fairly unanimous, that's really why I asked, it would feel out of order to dictate what he does with her. I wouldn't mind if she was older, but she's just 2!! He could always cook with her (he lives in a house with a huge kitchen), she loves helping out and I think they'd have much better bonding time doing that.
I actually sound like a control freak!

Ok my plan is to say nothing, but pack her a healthy little lunch? Does that sound fair? It'll save him money and give him the freedom to hang around his house with her etc?
But if he wants to continue their weekly tradition I'll bite my tongue.

Personally I wouldn't agree with that, but he is also her parent so has a right to make these decisions.

You can to talk about this, but you can't tell him not to take her.

It will cause an argument and he will probably keep taking her there anyway just to annoy you.