Paid bar at christening?

[Littleturkish]

I think you cannot have a paid bar at a christening, DH thinks you can.

I've never ever heard of it, and would rather have a smaller party and invite less people. He thinks it's fine and I'm being ridiculous. DH agrees we won't do it as I feel so strongly about it- but I wanted to check I am right on this- have you ever heard of a paid bar at a christening and what would you think if you went to a christening that did this?

Total hijack but hello fancyashandy. Interesting NN. Come 'ere often?

We had the party after DS was christened in the pub- mainly because the hall in our village had been booked by the family who had their DD christened on the same day. We bought enough bottles of fizz to give everyone a glass for the toast and tea and coffee was provided with the buffet. After that people bought their own.

I was raised a catholic and think that Jesus would not have turned water into wine if he was sniffy as such things.

He would have turned water into fizzy water.

So crack on I say. Crack on.

I'm sorry to be giggling at this dilemma, but the only christenings I have ever been to have been N Ireland Presbyterian ones, where the christening is a church service and that's that. Maybe coffee and cake at the parents house afterwards. The idea of a bar of any sort, paid or otherwise, has me doing this face

Life is so different here it seems!

I'm in Ireland, our christenings (and all the family ones I've been to) have been a meal in a hotel/golf club paid for by the parents and a paid bar. Now I should say, this tends to start at 1.30-2pm after late morning mass and go on till 4.30-5, so it's not really a terribly drinky affair.

YABU I've been to Christenings, Weddings and even Funerals with a paid bar. We had both DD 1 & 2's christenings at home afterwards, but now 7 years later DD3's will have to be at an outside venue as most of our friends and families have grown! We've been very conservative with numbers and still our guest list means we can't have everyone back to ours. So that will mean a drink to toast DD and a buffet but a paid bar. It won't be a session on a Sunday afternoon obviously, but for those who want to drink the option's there. In our family this kind of occasion is a great excuse for a get together as we all live scattered across the UK. No need for any 'paid bar' snobbery IMO

I should clarify that my face isn't in the sense of being judgemental about it, just that it's so far from my experience that it's something that never crossed my mind!

HaroldLloyd excellent point!

Hooray, for once a positive to being dragged up catholic and WC with all that guilt and damnation. Looks like we like a good shindig or two and don't need much excuse! Leave all the nice MC non Catholics to their tea and cake while we head down the pub!

Interesting that the op hasn't been back to confirm exactly what is meant by a paid bar.

Seems to me that lots of these people who "only" had a party at their house must have bloody huge houses! Talk of 60, even 100 people in "a few rooms and garden"....it's a different world.

You couldn't get 60 people in my house, even if they were sitting on each other's shoulders. And that would be a weird do indeed.

(completely misses point)

Ifancyashandy - only when I fancy a shandy.

"Seems to me that lots of these people who "only" had a party at their house must have bloody huge houses! Talk of 60, even 100 people in "a few rooms and garden"....it's a different world."

I wouldn't even know that many people to invite to a party let alone a christening. We live mils from our families and our friends re scattered. We had lunch back at our house because there were less than 20 people in the christening party.

I'd say it is very unusual to have a paid bar for a christening. I've also only been to one wedding where there was a paid bar. Paid for by loaded father.

There is no way I would ever expect for my drinks to be paid for.

Harold Lloyd- OMG I hope I get invited to one of your 'do's'. Right attitude!

FancyaShandy lots of WC non-Catholics also don't go in for the booze-up My mum's family is WC non-Catholic and barely any of them drink. My dad's family is WC Catholic and a dry wedding/christening etc would be very much frowned upon.

Grumpy I've never been to a christening where there are that many people, or rather that many of the family there. Most christenings now are done as part of a normal Sunday church service so most people there will be from the congregation and not the family.

DrNick sorry, YMMV = your mileage may vary.

Unfortunately many of my family don't share my interpretations of Jesus work, my mum thinks she is risqué if she has a brew after 9.30.

I remember going to a christening that was followed by an excellent all-dayer in the pub afterwards, and I ended up shagging the drummer from the band in a nearby alley. The next time I saw the baby's mum we had a giggle about that and agreed that it could be considered another 'welcoming' ritual to wish a happy sex life on her little DD when she was grown up.

Depends. For me the rule of thumb is that if you invite people into your home then you pay. If you invite people to a function space, such as a room over a pub, then you get the first round in and then after that they pay for their own.

I have never expected (or indeed experienced) a free bar at a function venue.

That said, I would never be particularly comfortable having very young children in an environment where someone could get pissed, and someone ALWAYS does!

Not fussed in the slightest about drinking arrangements at the christening but YABU simply as it is invite fewer people not less.

Again with hijacking apologies... Well, Fancyashandy guess I'll have to name change then! Been here a good number of years and only seen you this evening but it's clearly time.

Feel free to do whatever you want. I name change all the time.

But

What's mileage got to do with it?