82y old MIL expects me or DH to put in her suppositories when she comes for xmas?

[tiredpooky]

she is constipated last few days and wont even try to put them in herself. (Always been a helpless lady last 20y i've known her, expects others to 'do' for her)
I mean I am right arent I? Totally inappropriate and gross. DH says he wont and I have never got on with the lady...
{makes wretching sound}
she knows she can get the district nurse, but we get the impression that as she is coming here anyway, we might as well do it for her........
has she no shame?

I would do it got my mum and DH would do it for his. It's really down to your DH not you.

[faints}

I wouldn't. Well, I don't think I would.

Blimey

Can't she take a sennakot?

Snap the gloves on with manic laughter and big teeth grin then give her monologue of what you're doing

Realistically.. tell her no way and she'll just have to wait to shite till she gets home.

YY down to your DH - it's his Mum.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a winner! No more entries for the Worst Christmas Dilemma please.

No way, josé!

Seriously? But why can't she do it herself? It doesn't require any particular - um - dexterity, presumably? I guess I could probably do this for someone if I had to - & had disposable latex gloves! - but just don't understand why your MIL would want you to. Yuck.

this cannot be real.

bravo OP, you just made me snort with laughter!

Feed her nothing but prunes and dates for the entire Christmas period. She'll not need those suppositories then.

Wtf?! Seriously?

Can't she blutack it to something and just keep sitting down until it disappears...?

Sorry but

Well. I'd do it because I'm a nurse!

My dsis would do it because she has that kind of nod. My dbro wouldn't do it I'm sure and nor would DH!

It is a bit of a tall order!!

For the love of god, no!

I can't believe she would be fine with her son doing it. I thought most personal care for elderly ladies fell to the female relatives to do.

Oh dear god no !

Is there room for any presents up there?

YANBU, feed her fig rolls...

No. Just no.

Tell her you will arrange the district nurse or she can do it herself.

His mother, their problem...
Ewwwww

I'd give her some Movecol mixed into her Baileys.

Its very good for softening stools and will give her arsehole a holiday.

Can you not lace her food with prunes?

If you have to do it then get her to lie on her left hand side, put on disposable glove, gently part the but cheeks, a little lub then gently push the suppository in. Pretend you are Madonna or someone - this helps disassociate with the task in hand.

If you really cannot face doing it (completely understandable) then ask the district nurse to come in.

Make sure MIL drinks plenty of water and get her to eat tangerines or pineapple.(mild laxative effect).