82y old MIL expects me or DH to put in her suppositories when she comes for xmas?

[tiredpooky]

she is constipated last few days and wont even try to put them in herself. (Always been a helpless lady last 20y i've known her, expects others to 'do' for her)
I mean I am right arent I? Totally inappropriate and gross. DH says he wont and I have never got on with the lady...
{makes wretching sound}
she knows she can get the district nurse, but we get the impression that as she is coming here anyway, we might as well do it for her........
has she no shame?

She has no mobility problems then she should do it herself. I've done it in a professional capacity and would do it for family if they really couldn't do it themselves but that is all

No. Just. No.

at the blu tack suggestion!

I am almost crying at 'pretend you are Madonna'

Fuck me I'm a District nurse but would draw the line at inserting my digit into mil rectum!!

There is no way you or DH should be expected to do this for her. Keep the visit short and get MIL to use the oral laxatives mentioned.

If this is not possible then she sorts herself out. If you can wipe your own bum you can insert your own suppository.

If more help is required there is bound to be a Youtube clip on how to do this that you could show her .

Good point Gruntfuttock! Incidentally, I thought it was only my mum that used that word!

Can she wipe her own bum though? Perhaps not being able to pop a pill up the poop shoot is due to not being capable of hitting the spot.

I'm now wondering if she is going to give you an extra chrimbo present by hollering your name, loud enough to be heard over your Bing and Sir Cliff background music,wanting help with wiping her botbot.

Forget all laxatives, figs,dates and juices just in case and feed her toast for lunch so as not to upset her stomach

OMG I don't even like hugging so NO WAY would I do this! In fact I don't think I'd even want to stick one up my own arse.

I did snort out loud though at your OP

Snorted my tea at "straight out like a flock of sparrows". Sorry composHat

I'm so glad I'm off and currently home alone as I'm laughing so hard at the replies.

Just leave it to your DH to say no, that isn't appropriate, I suggest you buy some oral medicine.

yeah just shut it in a door frame and get her to back onto it. Slowly.

Don't do it! YADNBU! It's grim and unnecessary. Plenty of oral laxatives available and sure she can manage to lift a glass of water to her lips and swallow a tablet herself!

I had to put some in 6yo DD a while ago and it was horrible. She giggled at first then cried. DH flatly refused to do it. At least we are back to just movocal now.

I wouldn't want to put any in my MIL, or even my own parents, especially not if they are capable of doing it themselves. Really inappropriate!

No FUCKING way!

Give her an oral tablet.

Oh mother of God, you are kidding?!

I'd never be able to look her in the eye again!

Oh no. No way.

composhat anal carnage bloody brilliant.

Who usually administers the suppositories?
Wouldn't bother me tbh, but wouldn't do it for someone who is perfectly capable.
Perhaps she has an arse fetish?

ComposHat
Really should be CompoShat as indeed you did, lol at flock of sparrows.

Sorry op but this is so extremely funny (from the outside)!

Of course I'd help her with her suppository

FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS HOLY!!!!!!! Eeeeeeeew

God no.
I have seen my fair share of arses, without seeing inlaws.

Pretend you are Madonna

There is no way on earth I would be doing this.

I would not do this. And really can't imagine my MIL would want me to if she had any choice about it at all.

This reminds me of our family version of the classic Mariah Carey Christmas song. All I want for Christmas is pooooo