To find a SAHM with nanny a bit much?

[lill72]

I know a mum that has 2 DC. One is at school, one at nursery at least 3 mornings a week, with a nanny every afternoon. The nanny/housekeeper also does a few nights a week and then has a teacher on the weekend to do activities with as well as nanny one night. The mum spends hardly any time with the children, as she i never there when the nanny is, even though she is a SAHM.

Although some days I would love some more time on my own, I just find this amount of time away from your children is sort of odd, when you are able to spend it with them. Aren't these time precious?

By the way, I am not saying anything against working mums, only that if you have the chance/choice to be with your kids, shouldn't you make a bit more of it?

love to hear your thoughts?

well, I'm mostly sahm, but do roughly 8 hours a week from home. And having read this thread, I'm even more convinced that people who bang the same drum all the time, do so because they're not entirely happy with their lot.
Counselling works well for that..

Feeling good

I shouldn't worry, your DD will have a great time at nursery and will have a calm, relaxed mother when she gets home, it's nobodies business what you do.

Haven't read the whole thread but I think it is odd as it is quite a lot of childcare and if she is always out the house when the nanny is there then it doesn't look like she spends anytime with her kids.

However, it sounds bloody great

I have worked in NHS for 12 years. Have had enough as though I still enjoy my client work there is less and less of it and more management.

I'm having dc3 in March and going to take two years out, looking at training opps etc and hope to start up private practice at end. At end of mat leave, I will have been continuously employed for 13 years and then will have career break before beginning a new venture.

I'll have been in work for 2.5 out of seven years... but not on a CV. I often say I am SAHM though as I really am. A lot of SAHMs I know are doing all sorts of other things. .. study, business ventures etc. My kids are in nursery 2 days and will go three if I pursue MSc.

So many easy assumptions...

My SAHM neighbour tried to poach my nanny a year or so back. My nanny told her where to go and promptly told me about it. I was pretty tbh.

I'm pregnant right now, and the thought of a nanny for the first year is bliss. I could work a normal 40 hour week and get some sleep to boot! I think a small baby is more than one person can easily handle, though perhaps my view is jaded because DS was such an atrocious sleeper and had some oral problems that led to gut problems, so all in all it was a bit of a mare. Dunno.

I don't like the idea of it when they're school-age, though, if you're at home. I mean what would be the point? Either you'd never see them, or the nanny would never do anything. Not ideal either way, I would have thought.

I'd be very happy to have a chef. And housekeeper. And gardener. In fact, can I be the Queen?

However, we don't know if the OP knows the whole story. It may be that she has some physical or mental health difficulties that we don't know about.

I agree with peppermint. Some people have difficulties that they keep hidden from the world and you'd never guess their circumstances. Best not to judge IMHO.

i live in an area where there are a lot of sahm who have nannies, cleaners, gardeners, ironing service, window cleaners,swimm pool cleaners

in the end it is nothing to do with you op

the mum is not leaving children home alone or neglecting them

maybe she do charity work, maybe ill parents, maybe she just likes the help

oh forgot chef

Blah people always say on these threads - what if she has PND? Well she probably doesn't but just can't be bothered to raise her own kids.

The OP sounds jealous to me of her "friends" lifestyle.

Most of us would pay for extra help with kids or housework if we could.

How much does the father do to care for his children?

Presumably the dad coughs up the mula to support housewife and legion of staff

I had an interesting chat on this topic with some mates, they all live in a more ££££ locations than me, private school etc no im not fucking bitter

some stories they shared (and judged haha)

a SAHM who send her kids to bfast and after school club so she can go to the gym/museums

a parent that works 4 days but send kid to nusery 8-6pm on 5th day so they can rest

and the saddest was parents that sent the au pair with the nursery age child and school age child out at 730am every morning, dropping the younger one at nursery for 8am, the onto school for 9am. even though they could have easily sent elder kid to school first, then onto Nursery after hence saving an hour of walking about

parents that work FT, and have a nanny from the nursery at weekends

plus many many slave au pairs, sooo many slave au pairs!!!!

anyway, whatever!!!!

Do people get equally upset about fathers who have a private income large enough to live on but who still insist on going to work? Why is time with their children not precious to them?

Or fathers whose wives earn enough to support their families? I know several people who must reasonably fall in this category. Why do these men not care?

very good question

where i work, there are many men that dont see their kids for 2 weeks at a time due to extended work trips, the idea though is they see them when they get back on take back time

I am guilty as charged, as WOHM I have this "idea" that if I dont see kids, dont spend time with them I am a bad mother. that said, I LIKE seeing them but I am working on getting a bit more £me time"

thats why people who dont seem to ever want to see their kids, well it baffles me. why have them???

its fucked up I tell ya!

This will be my life when I win the Euromillions

Question to the why have em crew,should parents have kids velcroed to them then
For dome on mn working isn't acceptable in case one misses the precious moments
I suspect people have kids for similar reasons eg they want to