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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To start a thread about "Naughty Things I have Done Recently" as an antidote to the not-very-nice-threads.

189 replies

Salmotrutta · 14/10/2013 20:14

So:

I lied to DH on Saturday and said I got up at 8.00am when I really got up at 10.00am

I had cup-a-soup and tuna and mayonnaise sandwich paste on toast for lunch yesterday.

I also didn't get dressed until 12.00pm yesterday.

I left the laundry in the tumble dryer for two days as of today.

I'm going to hell aren't I? Shock

even though I don't believe in hell

OP posts:
DropYourSword · 15/10/2013 02:17

I love this thread. Thank you so much Salmotrutta!

I don't drink any hot drinks and basically live on diet coke (even for breakfast).

I hate milk so I microwave cooking chocolate and mix it with my cereal so I don't have to eat it dry.

DaleyBump · 15/10/2013 02:17

Tingly Halloween Blush my phone likes to add in an extra "e" now and again.

DropYourSword · 15/10/2013 02:23

And in the spirit of the thread....

I tried it. And didn't like it.

SecretWitch · 15/10/2013 02:25

Daley, God no to any tingly, whizzy,whip you into a frenzy lube! Tried once, had to sit in tub full of cold water for hours to calm things down.

The sex fairy definetly does not want your naughty bits to sparkle, glow or heat up.

SecretWitch · 15/10/2013 02:27

Dropyoursword, I think I may be giving your chocolate+cereal thing a whirl in the morning...

What I love about MN, bum sex and choc cereal all tossed together in one mad whirl!

DaleyBump · 15/10/2013 02:27

I did consider sticking a mini milk up there to ease the burning

SecretWitch · 15/10/2013 02:36

Daley, now you are just talking crap!! Wasting good chocolate on a bit of burning!

SecretWitch · 15/10/2013 02:37

Naught things I did today:

Jack Salmontrutta's thread to discuss bum sex with a heavily pregnant woman.

DaleyBump · 15/10/2013 02:39

It was going to be strawberry but whatever! Halloween Grin night Secret Halloween Wink

HorryIsUpduffed · 15/10/2013 08:30

What an absolutely fabulous thread.

I've been relatively virtuous today but I did pretend I was going for a Big Poo so I could shut myself in the bathroom and MN in peace for a bit while DH wrangled the DC.

thursdaysgirls · 15/10/2013 10:10

@horry - I have IBS and quite often pretend I've got "Gut Rot" as its called in my house so I can have 15 mins of peace sat on the floor.

Dobbiesmum · 15/10/2013 10:11

I did bugger all yesterday until just before tea time when I did a bit of a rerun of that Co Op advert and made out that I had slaved away making a stunning tea for everyone and had spent the day being Mrs Mop...

Melonbreath · 15/10/2013 10:23

I told oh that the baby had refused to nap all day and I was shattered so he made the dinner whilst I put my feet up.
Actually dd decided to do a 2 1/2 hour nap so I got a sofa snooze AND an episode of true blood with a hidden bar of chocolate, when i should have done the washing and cleaned the bathroom.

Naughty me!

Thatdidnotgowell · 15/10/2013 10:27

I've not done any laundry for 2 weeks (just me as OH away), my laundry basket is overflowing and I've been reduced to wearing increasingly bizarre outfit combinations in order to avoid actually having to do any. It's only since I'm down to my last pair of pants for tomorrow that I'm resigned to the fact that I need to put a wash on tonight.
I ate a whole bag of maltesers over the weekend and had skittles for 'dinner' last night.
I was late for work this morning because I couldn't bear to move from my nice, cosy bed.
I'm meant to be on a non-drinking detox health kick style thing...see aforementioned sweets combined with getting rather tipsy pissedasafart-- over the weekend.

fluffyraggies · 15/10/2013 10:36

I told DH that the reason there's hardly any food in the house, despite it being Tesco day, is that i came over all faint halfway through the 'big shop' and needed to go home (26 weeks preg.)

Real reason? I got halfway through the 'big shop' and then just.could.not.be.arsed to do any more ... and went home! Grin

fuzzypicklehead · 15/10/2013 11:03

As we speak, I am not sorting out "That Corner" full of boxes that have been sitting there since the move. I am also not driving down to get new tires on my car because my 3 year old is too busy colouring.

Itsybitsyteenyweeneyyellowpolk · 15/10/2013 11:17

I like to watch various 'fat' shows on demand (I used to be fat, obese: a year to save my life, fat: the fight of my life) to make myself feel skinny.

I'm size 16/18

mrspolkadotty · 15/10/2013 11:23

The leaving children on the floor bit i have done once or twice. In my defence DD2 is a terrible sleeper and you can't so much as breathe in case she wakes up so if she is asleep and safe i've left her on the floor and covered her up

I'm planning on nipping to the McD's drive thru when i go to asda, hopefully DD2 will nap in the car and i can stuff myself in peace. When hubby asks what i had for dinner i'll tell him soup.

I often spray dettol/febreeze/furniture polish before DH comes home and leave the hoover out so it looks like i've been busy all day. He never takes a closer look to see that things are still dusty.

I have bedding that has been in the tumble drier since Saturday.

I ate most of a tiny amount of the chocolate that i got to decorate DD's birthday cake later in the week so have to go and buy more.

elskovs · 15/10/2013 11:25

I missed my appointment to get the whooping cough vaccine to protect my unborn child because it was raining and I didn't want to get wet.

I didn't make a box for the harvest festival because I wanted to keep everything in my cupboard for myself.

I pretended to mistake a neighbours son for her grandson. I knew it was her son really, but she is old-ish and mean and I wanted to upset her.

MzPixielated · 15/10/2013 11:53

DP thinks ive been slaving away unpacking everything since moving house this weekend. all ive done is move the boxes a bit and hid some stuff Grin because im on MN

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 15/10/2013 12:08

I had a sandwich for breakfast. A sandwich made out of two rich tea biscuits and a massive spoonful of peanut butter.

And when I got to work I ate a snickers and put an IOU in the honesty box.

StephenKatz · 15/10/2013 12:28

My lovely friend and neighbour texted me asking to come round for a cuppa. I lied and said DD was unwell, when actually I just wanted to continue lying in bed fully clothed eating pop tarts for lunch.

I'm supposed to be maintaining my new slim, healthy eating, normal weight. See Pop Tarts above.

Itsybitsyteenyweeneyyellowpolk · 15/10/2013 12:47

I bought a box of roses choc's last week as I was feeling pre-menstrual and ate the whole lot without telling Dp.

I must stop reding this thread. It's too good.

DoubleDoubleTwigletTrouble · 15/10/2013 12:55

The other day I put all the clocks forward, so I could pretend to DD that it was bedtime. I got caught out when I forgot about the clock on her iPod though :o

Nicknameinvalid · 15/10/2013 14:24

Well today's installment (so far), I bribed the 7 year old to Hoover this morning (gave him scones for breakfast as a reward), wrote in the reading diary that we had read basically war and peace (ds read the blurb of a DVD if that counts), got a fabulous supervision report (because I spent most of yesterday doing everything I had not done to do and she complimented me on my work ethic snort, and am currently debating macdonalds for dinner as I've had such a busy day today I haven't

I have my own special area of hell just waiting for me don't i? Hmm