So upset. DP and best friend have been having a little "chat" about me.

[Babybunny88]

Before my friend "A" and I met she had been friends with my DP for years. DP and I were both mutual friends with A. That is how we met, she thought we would be a good match and introduced us 7 years ago. Fantastic.

Obviously because they have been friends for so long they occasionally text which doesn't bother me in the slightest, I know they don't have any romantically inclined feelings for each other. He has often said she is like a sister to him.

Anyway, I was playing a game on DPs iPhone while he pops round to his dbs house and a message from A popped up. I accidentally pressed it (really was an accident, as I was playing the game and hit the notice), and saw my name mentioned in the text so couldn't help reading it.

It said " Lol! do you want me talk to babybunny about it? Ill make her promise not to say anything to you about it."

Anybody seeing that message would feel inclined to read previous messages, wouldn't they? So I scrolled up and saw that supposed best friend and "d"p were talking about how much weight ive apparently gained. This is word for word how the text convo went:

A: hey, thanks for coming over last night. DH and I enjoyed seeing you both and your DD has got so big!! (We went to theirs for dinner last night)

DP: babybunny and I had a nice night as well. You cook a mean curry!

A: haha I know everybody loves my curries! Maybe though a salad would have been more healthier lol!!

DP: Ahh but who wants a salad on a Saturday night? Curry goes better with Beer! Babybunny doesn't like salads anyway.

A: yes I know... Maybe we should try to get her to like them though..before she puts on any more weight...lol...

DP: yeah maybe. ( I suspect DP didn't know what to say at this point)

A: you know I love her like crazy, but she seems to have put on a bit of weight.. Not good for her health!!

DP: Yea its been since DD was born. Do you have any suggestions? I've noticed this too but for obvious reasons can't say anything.

A: tell her to put down the pies lol!! Just joking! Talk to her about it if it were me I would like DH to tell me!

DP: are you joking? She will go apeshit. Definitely not guareenteed to put down the pies then!

A: Lol! do you want me to talk to babybunny about it? Ill make her promise not to say anything to you about it.

I am sitting here half devastated half furious! I can't believe the two of them have discussed this! Ok fair enough it wasn't for my eyes and they are probably worrying about my health but I am so upset and don't know what to say to DP when he gets back. Do i say anything to A? i already have self esteem issues and this has made me feel total and utter shit.i didn't think I was that fat. And they are both wrong, I do infact like salads!

Help? :(

Have a quick shuftie, OP.
take screen grabs and message them to your phone if you have time.

'I'm very tempted to look through his past messages and see..'

Of course look through them, forewarned is forearmed.

Yes. i would look at all.of their past conversations.

She is a viper in the nest.

Serve him a bag of lettuce

Sit down & thoroughly enjoy a pie.

Watch his face as the realisation hits that you've seen the text.

That is VERY mean indeed. I agree with an earlier post, she is reclaiming territory here. When I gained weight if my friend had discussed me with my DH I'd have eaten her for fucking breakfast!

Silly you eh for gaining weight after having another human growing inside you. I can totally understand why you are hurting, it has nothing to do with you though, it's all about her your friend feels about herself. She's got a kick out of doing this.

Now that you've seen what you've seen, I think it makes sense to look back on previous things that have been said.

Damn right I'd be looking at his past messages.

Fuck it, yes. Have look.

Normally I'm the first person to be all about looking through a partner's phone but we've already gone through the looking glass here.

"Normally I'm the first person to be all hmm about looking through a partner's phone but we've already gone through the looking glass here."

Exactly.

I'd have had a good old nose through the message history by now. May as well while you're there! I know it's "wrong" but....

I'd HAVE to read through previous messages after that! Wouldnt be able to stop myself.

*"Serve him a bag of lettuce

Sit down & thoroughly enjoy a pie.

Watch his face as the realisation hits that you've seen the text."*

^^ this is an idea I really like!

Anything, OP?

Don't forget the screengrabs.

I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to NOT look at previous messages after reading that ... Good luck with it though I sincerely hope they haven't said any more hurtful things about you.

Viper in the nest is exactly the phrase I was looking for!

What's her agenda? I mean, I'd be concerned about a friend if they were morbidly obese (although I'd find a better method of expressing it to them if I was going to) but to be "concerned" about someone wearing a couple of dress sizes up not long after a baby? Just bitchy.

Yes i wonder what other bitchy remarks have been made in the past.

A sounds like a dickhead, you have to say summat to her.

im really upset for you, I don't know what to say, You friend is not as very good one though

I'd have to keep looking through the messages I think, is it iMessage?

She's a bitch. He's a prick.

I don't think your dp comes out badly from this tbh.

I think A does.

He only copied what she said. He basically said if he tried to saying anything to you, you'd be mad and it wouldn't help only quoting her.

Ditch A.

DP - well, WHY can't he talk to you about weight? WOULD you go apeshit? I've never understood having a relationship where you can't be honest with the other person. Saying you've put on weight doesn't mean you've become unattractive.

Hope you are looking! I would be fizzing!

From line 3 in the message she was itching to get a dig in at you. She's no friend of yours anyway. I'd definitely have a look at their previous exchanges after seeing that 1.

How convenient that any messages before last week have been deleted..

Oh I am so angry. And to be honest while I have DPs phone I feel like being childish and texting her pretending to be DP and see what else the conniving little witch has to say.

I'd have to look at other messages too. I would be beyond fuming. A is a bitch and your 'd'p's comments about the pies is really cruel. You can tell A was trying to bring the conversation round to this topic by starting to talk about salads.
I bet she's jealous of you and is trying to dig at you. She's no friend of yours! Horrible woman.

Also- size 14!!!!! Ridiculous!!! Hardly 'who ate all the pies' territory

A is nasty. Your DP doesn't come out of this any better in my opinion. This wasn't a face to face conversation where he may have got flustered and not known what to say, he was texting so had plenty of time to read what she had said and compose a reply. He could have told her to get lost or even ignored her, the fact that he joked along with her makes him sound like a total twat.

phone her babybunny...