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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be so angry and upset by this?

178 replies

babyperks · 10/07/2013 23:21

One of my college friends was talking about booking her wedding for either next August/September. I was really happy and excited for her, and looking forward to her big day.

Then tonight I find out she's booked it for the same date as mine and OH's anniversary, when she knows full well that it's our day. Angry

I am so angry and upset about it, but don't know if I'm overreacting?

So, AIBU?

OP posts:
SalaciousBCrumb · 11/07/2013 15:19

17th September is MY BIRTHDAY. I've had it longer than you.

PeriodMath · 11/07/2013 15:21

Seriously Pobbal? The last wedding you attended, you can't remember even what month it was in?

nosila12 · 11/07/2013 15:33

I think there are so many factors when you book a wedding that remembering someone else's anniversary wouldn't come high on the list.

WafflyVersatile · 11/07/2013 15:34

16 June is my birthday week. Sad How could you?

OrangeLily · 11/07/2013 15:35

Awwwhhhh I get it now. OP Bride-itis comes to many of us but it passes. You'll look back and think about what a crazy lady you were! You have my genuine sympathy.

fedupwithdeployment · 11/07/2013 15:43

17th sept 2004 was when my son was born. On due date too! Sadly for him, 2of my friends had claimed it some 20 and 30 years earlier! They were both delighted!

Where has the OP gone?

samandi · 11/07/2013 15:47

Is the wedding on a Saturday? Most are, aren't they? So you are saying she can only get married on say 7/8 dates. Perhaps other friends married on those dates, too, or her family. Then you have to consider that a friend, or perhaps her sister, gave birth on one of those dates. She could potentially only have 1 or 2 dates left. And they might be booked already at the venue.

So yes, YABU ... but then you probably knew that already, this topic has been done to death.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 11/07/2013 15:49

YANBU.

I mean what's going to happen when you throw your 3 years since our wedding party? They won't be able to come and then mutual friends wil be torn.

she should totes cancel her wedding.

whois · 11/07/2013 15:53

Ha ha amazing thread. OP totally U, love it.

TheRealFellatio · 11/07/2013 16:07

I think you shoudl totes go to her wedding wearing your wedding dress and a veil.

That'll teach her for stealing.

That made me proper LOLZ.

wonderingsoul · 11/07/2013 16:12

im going against the grain and say YANBU

Your wedding day is really personal and you shouldnt have to be torn on going to a wedding when its your aniversairy.

im just fucking with you.

YABU and very very odd.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 11/07/2013 16:17

OP make sure you avoid TTC in January. you wouldn't want any pesky kids coming along and stealing your anniversary as their date of birth!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 11/07/2013 17:25

What did your MIL expect you to do if you went into labour on her birthday, ThePowerOfThree? Keep your legs crossed and refuse to push until midnight had passed and her birthday was over? What if you inconsiderately reached the second stage of labour just as her birthday begun? That would necessitate an awful lot of self control on your part!

miffybun73 · 11/07/2013 17:32

Grin at wonderingsoul

DoJo · 11/07/2013 18:47

WonderingSoul - Grin

Our friends were considering our anniversary for their wedding and actually asked us if we minded! Bless their cotton socks, it actually took us a while to catch on what they were talking about and once we realised we were horrified that they thought we would give a shiny shit about the fact it was our anniversary compared to our desire to share their special day.

LizzieVereker · 11/07/2013 18:55

I think you should get divorced and then remarry on a date which would be significant to your friend, such as her birthday, or the anniversary oh her losing her first tooth or something.

That'll teach her.

ThePowerof3 · 11/07/2013 18:58

I don't know SDTG but I know what she's like and she would definitely made sure my DF wouldn't be at any of DDs birthday celebrations if it did clash with hers

ThePowerof3 · 11/07/2013 19:00

I went to a wedding that was on the same date as two of the guests and they were both divorced, they kept that detail to themselves though

kerala · 11/07/2013 19:09

This is a joke OP I assume? If not OP has utterly lost it.

Time to remove yourself from the wedding zone and rejoin the real world and regain your perspective.

Alisvolatpropiis · 11/07/2013 19:31

You must get so upset when you meet people who share your birthday OP Grin

What will you do if one of your friends has a child on the same date? Spontaneously combust?

Cravey · 11/07/2013 19:47

Wondering soul. I think I love you.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 11/07/2013 19:57

PeriodMath Thu 11-Jul-13 15:21:37
Seriously Pobble? The last wedding you attended, you can't remember even what month it was in?

Yes, it was last week.

Zoomania · 11/07/2013 20:05

Firstly consider from her point of view. You start with the aim of a summer wedding. Then you check with both your work diaries and block out some of the weekends, then you ask your parents and inlaws if there are any they are away, then your best man and bridesmaids and siblings. You are left with a few dates..., then you find some nice venues....the first two are completely booked up and the next one has one date free that you can make so you book it.....

Secondly...it sounds soppy but when we go to a wedding my DH and I like to hold hands and think about our vows as the couple make theirs. It is a lovely way to have a moment to relive yours...perfect on your anniversary!

nauticant · 11/07/2013 20:57

The OP should write to say they'll boycott the wedding.

If the offenders don't get the message, they should hold a protest outside on the day. Placards, that kind of thing.

If the offenders actually go ahead, next year, 21 days before the anniversary date, a Cease and Desist letter should be sent to prevent special day robbery by virtue of anniversary celebration.

HaroldLloyd · 11/07/2013 21:16

They are going to have sex and all on your special day!

Dirty disgusting animals.