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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To think its not normal to be able to suck air into your vagina and then fart it out?

312 replies

VivaLeBeaver · 24/06/2013 19:29

Dd can do this on demand. Not that I demand she does it but she thinks its hysterical.

And it's not just a little fanjo parp. It's like a trumpet which just keeps going and going. She's trying to play tunes now. Dh thinks she will be able to make a career out of it. Hmm

I've told her she'll knacker her pelvic floor.

OP posts:
xylem8 · 25/06/2013 10:23

what a classy family you are!

HighBrows · 25/06/2013 10:28

There's a whole South Park episode dedicated to the wonder that is queefing!

Viva your dd is very talented! Grin

Latara · 25/06/2013 10:29

I can't believe she's told your DH that she can fanny fart. I would never have discussed anything like that with my Dad!!.

digerd · 25/06/2013 10:32

I am now also intrigued and mind boggled at " backs of knees on crook of elbows". Oh, think I've got the right image now as we used to do that in our ballet and jazz classes, but one leg at a time on our backs on the floor. We wore thick tights, knickers and a jock strap, so no way was that going to happen Grin. Also did lots of other contortion exercises.

I would have watched how my DD did it but don't think she would have offered to show me. Still very intriguing and entertaining.
Loving tunes being played Grin

Crinkle77 · 25/06/2013 13:33

Ha ha ha ha ha ha. I used to do this all the time and had forgotten all about it although I had to be in a certain position to do it. Think I might have to try when I get home to see if I can still do it ......

garlicnutty · 25/06/2013 13:53

... he said "oh that's fanny farts McDonald isn't it?"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAH! Grin Grin Grin

... and :( Blush for Ms McDonald!

garlicnutty · 25/06/2013 13:54

Oh, Latara :( for your friend. They can cause nasty infections ...

farewellfigure · 25/06/2013 14:18

The youtube tutorial is hilarious. I will try it later. I'll definitely go for a wee first though.

Bluestocking · 25/06/2013 18:55

Latara, I had a fistula repaired - it's a lot less embarrassing than having farts and all the rest coming out of one's vagina. PM me if you like, I'll be happy to talk to your friend if she needs encouraging to get it sorted out.

Latara · 25/06/2013 19:02

It's actually a much older female relative (just easier to say 'a friend'). She's just considering turning down surgery for another more serious health problem so i don't want to broach the fistula issues just yet until we can convince her to get the other surgery done.

But thanks v much for your concern Bluestocking and garlic i will definitely discuss the subject when the time is right to. It's been a problem for a long time now.

Northernlurker · 25/06/2013 19:07

The Op's dd is very funny and harmless but Latara is right. This can be caused by childbirth injuries and is potentially very distressing.

itsblackoveryonderhill · 25/06/2013 19:20

I've got half way down the thread and I'm crying with laughter.

I've never had such a skill and I doubt my crap pelvic floor could pop out a little squeek now. Shock Grin Blush

itsblackoveryonderhill · 25/06/2013 19:31

all of you seem to be able to do apparently have amazing pelvic floors. I'm going to start a pelvic floor strengthening class in a month, called the Foo Foo Fun Club, do you think this will be something that is expected of me at the end of the course?

Can you imagine it......

teacher: right then its black, when you started you had a fanny like a cheap carrier bag caught in the wind, to graduate from the class, you need to be able to play the first 12 bars of the trumpet voluntery......

ModreB · 25/06/2013 19:45

This reply has been deleted

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VivaLeBeaver · 25/06/2013 19:51

OMG, she just pulled a bunch of flowers out her foof!

OP posts:
VivaLeBeaver · 25/06/2013 19:54

Sticky Vicky that is, not dd!

OP posts:
QOD · 25/06/2013 19:56

Unfortunately I can only do this during sex ... It's like a fecking wind sock.

ModreB · 25/06/2013 19:57

Apparently, Sticky Vicky has a daughter who followed in her footsteps

Confused
Sheshelob · 25/06/2013 20:00

I'm firmly with LEM.

I genuinely don't want to know anything about someone else's child's vagina.

Confused
reelingintheyears · 25/06/2013 20:03

My thoughts exactly Sheshelob,fucking disgraceful.

Onesleeptillwembley · 25/06/2013 20:05

Outing myself here - we used to do' fanny farts' at school. I can assure you that even after children my pelvic floor is fantastic - maybe the muscle control.

AvonCallingBarksdale · 25/06/2013 20:14

I'm feeling a bit po-faced here, I'm afraid. Feels a bit weird to me talking about someone's 12YO DD's vagina Confused

Sheshelob · 25/06/2013 20:16

Agree, Avon. I'll happily be accused of being po, too. Some things genuinely have no business on a public forum.

reelingintheyears · 25/06/2013 20:20

Yup,po faced here too and totally don't care.

I can't imagine discussing DD like this and would be Hmm if DP thought it was appropriate to joke about it being a career.

GibberTheMonkey · 25/06/2013 20:21

Talk about mine then Grin
I used to be able to do this pre children
I don't think I've tried since
Do I need to try and report back?

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