To think its not normal to be able to suck air into your vagina and then fart it out?

[VivaLeBeaver]

Dd can do this on demand. Not that I demand she does it but she thinks its hysterical.

And it's not just a little fanjo parp. It's like a trumpet which just keeps going and going. She's trying to play tunes now. Dh thinks she will be able to make a career out of it.

I've told her she'll knacker her pelvic floor.

[TheRealFellatio]

I think it may have been me who inadvertently ignited it all again. Apologies - I came to the thread late and didn't read all the way to the end.

[AvonCallingBarksdale]

Yes, we all rode off on our high horses, boxing gloves down and pelvic floors clenched into the sunset! Probably a good idea if we do so again and the thread just quietly pffffts...

[Guerrillacrochet]

I was reading this yesterday and thought there was a cease fire? I can see both sides to this argument ... i was a bit surprised by the OP but presumed it was because I came from a no-nudity and farting household! I don't think the OP or her DH were thinking of job opportunities in the sex industry, but the deleted ping pong comments were a bit bleugh.
I really can't see why the thread is still here though. It sounds like the OP has hidden it, and anyone laughing at the beginning is surely not laughing now. It's just a bit of a shitstorm, and I can't see anyone 'gaining' from keeping it? Please mumsnethq, put it out of its misery.

[AvonCallingBarksdale]

No, it's unseemly and undignified talking about a 12 year old girl doing this and talking about ping pongs and her taking her talents to Thailand. That's the bit that's not on. Couldn't care less if it's adults talking about their ability to perform said stunt!

[ICBINEG]

hmm okay so in my book all parts of the body are body parts. They do different things but so the fuck what?

I think the concepts of modesty and shame are essentially interchangable when it comes to body parts.

People say things like 'I am not ashamed of my breasts, but I wouldn't show them in public' but if you substitute 'arms' or 'legs' for 'breasts' then it suddenly sounds weird and nonsensical...because it is, weird and nonsensical.

The concept of modesty is one of oppression. Men can show their nipples but women can't? Yeah...whatever.

You can talk about blowing air out of any hole you like...except a vagina. That is unseemly and undignified. Yeah...whatever.

[AnyFucker]

Arf

[notafan0fy00]

"Gawd I saw this great big vagina at work today everyone"
"Really, a vagina? In your line of work?"
"Yeah a great big farty one"
"Was it like that huge picture of a vagina in the open textbook on the coffee table mum?"
"Yeah, a bit like that. Hang on, flip to the picture on page 26 - it's more like that one"
"Well, since we're looking at graphic images and having a graphic conversation about vaginas, guess what mine can do?"

[HolidayArmadillo]

No but there is generally textbooks and whatever lying around plus general chat about the work day. Must just be my house.

[notafan0fy00]

Sorry to double post but have started cracking up laughing at the idea that midwives and their families have 'graphic vagina talk and images at home'. Do you think they photograph each one they see and then show the images to their families later and talk about them in detail?

[notafan0fy00]

Who on earth would someone 'no doubt' grow up with graphic vagina talk and images just because their mother is a midwife?!?! Do you think people who have proctologist dads grow up with graphic images and talk about their anuses?! Do you think that people whose parents work in a medical lab just love talking about faeces all day?!

Being comfortable with your body and having a bit of modesty are two different things. We're a very happy, open family but if my DD was playing amusing tricks with her vagina, I'd tell her gently that it's a private part of her body and that it's not a very nice thing to do. I wouldn't engage in discussions with her about how well she can play with her vagina, or be comfortable with my husband doing the same, or laugh about it and describe her vagina, including the parts of her vagina, on an internet forum.

None of that is normal for midwives, and believe me - I know.

[HolidayArmadillo]

I really don't think there is any need for that xylem8. I reiterate that midwives and offspring of midwives who will have no doubt grown up with graphic vagina talk and images at home do tend to be a lot less hung up on vaginas - or that may just be my house. Anyway. Viva has hidden the thread as has no desire to be drawn back in to it.

[Feminine]

I'm still shocked that the DD wasn't too mortified to share.

At that age they have basically the same vagina as a grown woman. Why has she no modesty?

All this 'sharing' we do these days will someday backfire.

[nemno]

Gosh, does this make me repressed? I don't think I am. I have boys with whom I have a fabulously frank relationship. I just didn't want to discuss a 12 YO's vagina antics with my husband. I think if I had a daughter then yes I could talk to my DH about hers.

[Montybojangles]

Seriously?
Do you not think he might have said the same thing if his daughter could arse fart the national anthem, or Drink milk and then squirt it from her eye (some people can do this).
The op thought it was an unusual thing her daughter could do. And pretty impressive.
Good post ICBINEG

[nemno]

I read the OP fairly early on and was amused. So much so that I nearly turned round to my husband to ask if he knew what a queef was. But I didn't because it seemed all wrong to explain to an adult male that this woman on MN was telling us about her 12yr old and the mechanics of how she does it. So I get that the OP was amused and wanted to share but it was ill judged.

[Gruntfuttock]

This is from the OP:-

"She's trying to play tunes now. Dh thinks she will be able to make a career out of it."

You think that's fine, ICBINEG?

[ICBINEG]

hmm well I think the fact that people can't talk about air going in and out of a vagina without it being a Thing is part of the problem with attitudes to sex in the UK.

You know which countries have the lowest rates of rape, sexual violence against men, women, and children etc etc?

The countries that have the most open, no holds barred, no censorship approach to sex education, porn, and discussion of sex, and bits of the body involved in sex.

It's okay to talk about arse farting but not fanjo farting? Ridiculous.

[xylem8]

what sort of a parenting website carries a thread like this?

[TheRealFellatio]

I don't think we have been sexualising a child, I think are showing concern that anyone who did want to sexualise a child would be having a field day off the back of this thread.

Besides, the transition from the physical state of childhood to adulthood is not a like a lightswitch that you flick they day a person turns 16. It's a much more subtle, gradual and complicated thing than that. If I were this girl's mother I'd be saying 'that's very entertaining darling but you are almost a teenager now, and it's probably not a good idea to be doing this in front of people. Including us. For all sorts of reasons.'

If some people are sexualising her, then others are definitely infantalising her. She's 12 FFS, not four!

Some of you may only have very young children and you cannot envisage a time when they are any different than they are now, and while this girl is still a child of course, she is of an age where she needs to start to learn about the transition through puberty to womanhood, and behave appropriately. I'm sure none of you would tolerate a 12 year old boy wandering around the house trouserless and constantly pulling at his willy in front of you, in the way that you might accept in a toddler, or saying 'Mum! Dad! Look how I can make my erection go up and down in time to the music' so I don't see how this is much different really.

[ICBINEG]

wow.

I don't get the outrage.

A 12 yo has found an unusual talent and is confident enough in the love and respect of her mother to tell her about it.

The mother doesn't think it is weird to discuss online precisely BECAUSE she doesn't think of her own daughter in a sexualised way.

The vast VAST majority of the comments that could be interpreted in ANY sexualised way have been made by people saying the thread should be pulled for sexualizing a child.

OR YOU COULD HAVE JUST STFU AND LET IT BE A FUN THREAD ABOUT A CHILD.

[Spottyblancmange]

If by some folks you include me MNHQ you've interpreted me wrong, it wasn't a dig at you about favouritism, I just meant the other posters reactions, where it was admitted some hadn't said anything because it was a well loved poster.

It's not a bad thing, it happens on every single forum on the internet I'd imagine. It's just unusual to see it admitted here, normally everyone insists they react the same regardless and it's herecy to say they don't. Which I'm sure some people do, but I'm equally sure some people don't.

[LEMisdisappointed]

I certainly don't think its a case of favouritism that Viva has been treated differently on this thread. I certainly held back on comments as because it is someone i trust as a poster, it was just the subject matter and the appropriateness that I called into question.

1. She didn't name change because she didn't think it wa inappropriate, has nothing to hide etc. If it was a new poster i would have been suspicious that the thread was started just to goad, i don't think that is the case i think it was just poorly judged. I would really hope that viva doesn't feel she can't post on here.

[xylem8]

I think this thread may attract people reading it for the wrong reasons, and if brought to media attention, certainly sends out the wrong sort of message for a parenting website with regards to protection and respect for children.

[HelenMumsnet]

Morning. And thanks to those of you who've reported this thread to us.

We hear what some of you are saying about this thread being in bad taste but we don't generally delete on grounds of bad taste. Everyone has such different 'bad taste' thresholds, it's almost impossible to know where to draw the line.

We can see that some folks are saying that the fact that the OP is a well-known user has/will influence our decisions here. And, yes, that's true - to a certain extent.

The fact that the OP's been on Mumsnet for a number of years and has a perfectly normal posting history (ie she's clearly not some weirdy, pervy troll) is very relevant.

We don't think this is favouritism; just common sense.