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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed at mil with regards to our dog dh says iabu but am I?

111 replies

concernedmate · 19/05/2013 20:17

Mil and Fil are coming to stay for a long weekend, they have said to find dog kennels to put our dog in and they will pay.

I think they are out of order as our dog doesn't like being away from us, and who are they to dictate where our dog goes, they are not allergic or scared of dogs, they are just not keen on them.

We have an older dog who is not bother, she doesn't jump up or anything.

I said to dh I won't do it as she is part of our family, but he says as they are prepared to pay and not keen on dogs to make life easier we should book the dog in.

I know mil will make a song any dance every time she finds a dog hair on her clothes.

I told dh I would ask the mumsnet jury.

So wwud ? am I BU in telling mil the dog is going nowhere?

OP posts:
SisterMatic · 19/05/2013 20:19

YANBU.
Could they go to a hotel?

Ra88 · 19/05/2013 20:20

from someone who isn't a pet lover ... YADNBU ! it is your home , if she wants to stay then she stays, dogs and all! tell her if she is willing to pay for a dog kennel, then she can pay for a hotel for herself ! :)

SauvignonBlanche · 19/05/2013 20:21

YANBU, find them a hotel.

glamstretchmarks · 19/05/2013 20:21

hmmmm, very difficult... i am a bit surprised they had the cheek to ask tbh but not sure what I would do.

YANBU with whatever you chose, it is your dog and your house but I am eager to please... having said that I love my pets so much...

coffeeinbed · 19/05/2013 20:21

Bloody hell.
No way is my dog going in a kennel until there's definite medical reasons for it.

Misknit · 19/05/2013 20:21

There's no way I'd kick my dog out for them. But then I've had a horrible experience the only time I've used one.

Tell them to book a hotel nearby if they've got money to flash around.

CloudsAndTrees · 19/05/2013 20:21

I wouldn't ever make my dog stay in a kennel to keep someone else happy. I wouldn't even do it if the Queen herself wanted to come and stay.

YANBU.

Your husband needs to grow a pair and say no to his Mother. They can pay for their hotel instead.

SisterMatic · 19/05/2013 20:22

Tell them your dog would be distressed in kennels, especially as she is an older dog. It would not be fair to put her in a strange environment when your ils can just as easily stay in a hotel.

ENSMUM · 19/05/2013 20:22

YANBU. If they don't want to stay with dog they should stay in hotel.

NatashaBee · 19/05/2013 20:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

marriedinwhiteagain · 19/05/2013 20:22

Why aren't they keen? Unless they (one of them at least) are scared of dogs (and I am of strange ones but wouldn't exopect you to out your dog in kennels if you could isolate him/her if barky or likely to jump up) or allergic, they are v unreasonable.

If they don't like the hospitality you are able to offer they wouldm imo, be better behoved to book themselves into an hotel - not the other way round.

TheVermiciousKnid · 19/05/2013 20:23

YANBU. If you stay at their house and they don't want you to bring the dog, that's fair enough. But in your own house it's not up to them.

cozietoesie · 19/05/2013 20:23

I trust your MIL likes children?

cornypedicure · 19/05/2013 20:23

they can stay in a hotel themselves if it bothers them that much

stickyg · 19/05/2013 20:23

I would put your pil in a kennel before the dog !

cocolepew · 19/05/2013 20:24

No way! Cheeky beggers Shock

marriedinwhiteagain · 19/05/2013 20:24

And shd have added, if I found year dog scary I would go to an hotel.

furbaby · 19/05/2013 20:24

Tell her to fuck off ! Its your dogs home not hers . Bloody cheeky mare ! Any kids ? Maybe you could foster them out for weekend !!!

ArthurCucumber · 19/05/2013 20:25

YANBU, and I don't even like dogs. I've been known to refuse visitors who were proposing to bring dogs - citing elderly cat, but the fact is, I just don't want a dog in my house. But if I'm going to visit someone who has a dog, then my distaste is my problem, not theirs. I wouldn't put my cat in a cattery for a visitor and wouldn't expect them to put their dog in kennels for me. If they dislike it that much, they can stay in a hotel and meet you outside your home.

StrangeGlue · 19/05/2013 20:25

That is so cheeky! I would say thanks but no thanks - yanbu!

MsFlippingHeck · 19/05/2013 20:25

Bloody hell they're cheeky yadnbu

quoteunquote · 19/05/2013 20:25

Go out and foster a couple of dogs and buy a puppy.

MikeOxard · 19/05/2013 20:26

YANBU. How rude of them. Kennels are a last resort, they can get very stressed, especially an older dog. They can pick up kennel cough, fleas, or anything any of the other dogs are carrying. It isn't a great place to be and there's no need for it if you are willing and able to take care of your own dog yourself, which you are.

It's very nice of you to offer the ILs to stay, but it's obviously on the basis that the family pet will be there. If they don't like it they should politely refuse your hospitality and stay in a hotel instead. It's very, very rude of them to ask you to put the family dog in kennels, regardless of whether they're offering to pay. I wouldn't entertain the thought at all.

sue52 · 19/05/2013 20:27

It's your dog's home. They can stay in a hotel. YANBU

Madsometimes · 19/05/2013 20:28

No way would I put my dog in kennels, even for someone who was allergic.

The reason I would not move him for an allergy sufferer is that my house would still contain dog allergens, so the allergy sufferer would still react. I know this because my dh has a severe cat allergy. My sister (who has cats) gave my mum a sofa. We went to stay at my mum's (no cats) and dh became so unwell.

I also wouldn't move him for any other reason, because it is my house. I do lock him in the kitchen if someone who is nervous around dogs comes to stay because he's a bonkers spaniel he can get rather excited with new people. But that is as far as I go.