Strip club!

[everythinghappensforareason]

So dh has been kicked out back to his Mothers following a night out Saturday, that ended at a strip club, not only that but also paying for a lap dance from a young girl in nothing but a thong. Ive never been so mad, there was 3 of them. It makes me feel sick, he has apologised + claimed he didn't enjoy it one bit, it was worse than he imagined etc. but i just feel like people around me ( his family) Probably think im over reacting, so my question is, what would u do?

"Fact. No-one said every man goes to strip clubs. " bp300 did

"No-one said your husband is doing these things" - yes you did Eyes. You did say this. And you attacked countrykitchen and others calling them hags, vipers etc etc who faked orgasms/ didn't know their husbands / etc etc.

"I am leaving the thread until someone comes up with something vaguely resembling a non-combative philosophy about men and women and sexual identity."

This is not what the OP's post and this thread is about! As I said before, start your own thread!

"
And for what it's worth, Cuntry isn't the only woman on here coming across as a 'crotchety hag'.
"

ok dear. sigh

PMSL.

You know nothing about the people posting on this site. You know nothing about our experiences, who we know, who we empathise with.

But what I do know about you, is that you are not very good at empathy. You seem to live in some sort of deranged reality where anyone who disagrees with you is a deluded, middle class pearl-clutcher.

FWIW I have no idea why you suggest I should employ a stripper as a cleaner. a) I do my own cleaning b) I can't afford a cleaner c) I don't know if a stripper would want a job cleaning my house or anyone else's. Also no, I don't respect the job - upholding patriarchy isn't something I can support, but I can separate the choices of women who go into the sex industry, from the political analysis of the industry and I can do a political and personal critique of the men who feel entitled to objectify women in that industry or in any other area of life.

HTH.

Going to original post and not read the whole 15 page thread... I have mixed feelings.

My DH is not your average Neanderthal man who would enjoy going to a strip club so that part would not really bother me as much.
I would however be very bothered if he paid money for a topless lapdance. That is very wrong when you are in a relationship with someone despite the fact there is no physical touching.
If a random girl in the street came over to him and exposed herself suggestively is no different than a lap dancer only the lap dancer has been PAID!

However. My hen night last year was shared with 4 other hens and there were male strippers there. I didn't get involved with the games they do, like licking cream off their body or undoing their zips with my teeth but I did have a photograph taken with them and another hen. Us girls were sat on the chair and the strippers were stood over us.
I was laughing because I was so embarrassed and when I got home I told my now DH straight away and showed him the pictures thinking he'd be pissed off but he wasnt in the slightest. He just said its not as if there was anything emotional in it.
His reaction to this has made me think more about if he were to go to a strip club I might now feel differently (not the paid lap dancer thing though!). It wouldn't be something he'd do off his own back to go to one but he may find himself out with the lads one night and would go part of the group.
I wouldn't like the thought if him looking at sexy naked women who have nicer breasts/bum/legs than me but I would trust him.

Pissed off as I have had a MN warning for saying that Eyes is full of shit! Huh. May flounce.

And she has referred to me (rather wittily not ) as Cuntry and called me a 'crotechty hag' . But reports me for saying what I said. Double standards anyone?

Country, you'll get over it, love.

I still have not had a response to my suggestion that your sons are watching porn and your daughters are dressing for men.

glossyflower you make interesting points re the male stripper thing but I have to say that I would not have stayed/taken part and would have buggered off home. Not my thing at all and I think my dh would think less of me if I did go - not because he would be threatened sexually (much like your wasn't) bit because he would think it so tasteless and tacky.

By-the-way, why do some of you feel it necessary to claim your husband's sexual identity? Next thing you'll be telling me he only thinks about you when he's masturbating...

Blimey, Country, you'd better not go oop North if you are outraged at being called 'love' (and don't ever go to Blackpool if you don't like 'cheap and tacky').

Eyes how do you know you are the ONLY woman on here to have ever worked in the sex industry?

Gogo, because, so, far, there has only been myself who has championed the cause of sex industry workers (except for Bp; I'm not sure whether she has or not). I'm sorry if I have presumed wrongly.

Where did I say I was outraged? Erm...that's right - didn't and I'm not.

Oh yeah Eyes SOME of our sons and daughters are watching porn and dressing for men. SOME not ALL
Perhaps if you stopped posting opinions as absolute fact there'd be more of a debate. Agree with previous posters...start your own thread.
Also suprised you are reporting posters when you are clearly so combative and provocative

I shall return later to see whether anyone has responded to my suggestion about your sons and daughters...

Cross-posted, Gogo, thank you for your reply. I never said all sons and daughters now, did I? I am addressing all the women on here who are taking the moral high ground about the sex industry and all it entails and represents: does your son/has your son ever wanked over porn? Has/does your daughter dress for men?

If my posts are crossing boundaries of mumsnet etiquette or guidelines I shall bow to any direction from MNHQ. In the meantime, Gogo, I will continue to report anyone I see fit.