Nanny spotted reading magazine whilst child at playbarn

[zebedeethezebra]

AIBU to be annoyed at my nanny for reading a wedding magazine whilst 3 year old DS is at a playbarn, or do all nannies think it is reasonable to behave like this??

She was spotted by one of my friends the other week. I don't mind her having a coffee or something whilst she is there, but I expect her to keep an eye on DS, not have her nose buried in a magazine. Particularly on the money we pay her.

OP, have you considered one of these:
www.theverge.com/2012/4/6/2930433/university-of-washington-robovie-robot-nanny

They don't need to eat, no reading and you won't need to pay it.
ALthough no doubt there'd soon be a thread about how outraged you are that the damn thing uses your electricity when it needs charging-up.

Sitting reading a mag and not looking up until someone poltely asks you if that child sitting over there crying belongs to you is no level of supervision to me. And I'd bet money that there are a few on this thread who do exactly that.

I think the person who comes out worst in this is the 'friend' who gossiped to you that she had seen your nanny reading magazines. Either she was concerned about your child welfare, in which case why didn't she intervene at the playbarn, or she could tell your child was not at risk, in which case by telling you she is just deliberately shit-stirring.

Without knowing what type of playbarn it was, or how engrossed your nanny was it is impossible for any of us to say whether or not YABU.

Fwiw, ds is 2 and I always send dh go on the play frame with him, and wouldn't feel at all happy about him going in to play with school age children on his own. I constantly see bumps and accidents at soft play - not feral children just excited boisterous kids who will inevitably bump and bang into each other. Not so bad if it is two 10 year olds, not so great if it is a 2 year old and a 10 year old.

Christ on a fucking bike... please tell me this is a joke thread.

Nah. When I'm out with my kids I head 3 miles in the opposite direction lest be I be expected to get off my backside and do something with them. I don't interact. Just keep them in a box till they're 18 for preference.

I don't take them to swimming lessons either.

Oh yes - I remember that other barking thread as well. It's no wonder some parents struggle to hold onto their nannies.

She reads? She eats? What else does she do? I'm guessing she buys pasta from m&s for your dcs and doesn't make it herself too?

Good Lord OP YABU. As an ex nanny I would be horrified to find my employer complaining that I had looked at a magazine while at a soft play.

I had a message from a friend about this thread and we guffawed and said how we would have been sacked on the spot by the OP. Especially during Wimbledon when our charges were left to shock horror play with each other.

Our employers were always very understanding of us working long hours and that if we wanted to sit down for half an hr and watch the TV or read a book that was perfectly acceptable.

And I'd bet money that there are a few on this thread who do exactly that.

No! You have to pay for playbarns. I put them in a dog crate in the garden and take them out 20 mins before parents arrive to warm them up

Foshizzle I don't think anyone has said they don't need supervision, just that the level of supervision required is keeping an ear and eye out from your table. Most people are perfectly able to glance at pictures of wedding dresses inbetween glances at the children. You don't need to be standing by the playframe, nose pressed against the mesh, yelling 'No Tarquin! No running, get down it's high, mind the baby, oh watch a big boy is coming, TARQUUUIINNNN!

I also think there is a massive difference between a 2 year old and a 3 year old. At 3 years old they're probably at pre-school/nursery and used to being trusted to play by themselves.

Our softplay has a seperate bit for under 3's that adults are allowed into. It's only 3+ that adults are banned from. They do have staff in there to prevent any seriously dangerous behaviour and supervise the death slide.

If this did actually happen, I wonder if the friend only mentioned it in a 'oh is nanny putapon getting married then' sort of way, not realising the angst and rage she would be unleashing?

And what oblomov said. Happy sigh

I was going to answer something quite sensible and then I read your comment that we are all evil and nanny/ childminders so now I can't be bothered ......:)

YABVU - with not only your view that your child should be under constant scrutiny but your attitude as well.

Please do send photos when your Nanny has finished your extension though. Would LOVE to see them.

Poor nanny. I hope she finds a better employer than the vile sounding OP very soon.

Playbarn=place children can play independantly!!

YABU!!

I haven't read the OP's other thread so can't speak for her overall approach but for me the bottom line is that if I am paying someone to look after my children then yes - particularly in a public place - I expect their full attention to be on my kids, especially if they are toddlers. And other people's opinion on whether I was being overcautious / neurotic or not wouldn't really influence that.

I go out regularly with a childminder (who used to childmind for me) and a nanny and I could not for a minute imagine them reading a magazine / playing on their phone at soft play. Sitting, having a coffee and chatting, while watching their charges - yes absolutely.

But yeah, Outraged, I'm not really loving the idea of standing next to Tarquin's mum either .

I have done enough supervising/climbing after littlies in softplays to last me a life time!
I am delighted that DS4 no longer wishes me by his side tbh .

OP are you cross because she hasn't told you she's getting married and she might leave so you're going to have to go through the bother of replacing her?

Yabu. Maybe you should pay your nanny more to put up with you.

We have children where I work that are total spoilt brats due to having constant attention and it doesn't serve them well in the end. Do you expect your nanny to constantly interact with your child 8 hours a day? really?

YABU

A 3y does not need a helicopter parenting approach in soft play. They are in a pretty safe environment and should be given the opportunity for some freedom and play time with other children and not an adult trailing them at every step.

She was flicking through a magazine. I suspect she was checking where your ds every so often by simply having a quick glance every couple of minutes or so. Just the same as most parents would.

I am not a nanny or childminder btw, nor do I use on.

Your friend was obviously keen to grass her up to you though, wasn't she?!

You need Mary Poppins

YANBU I would always watch the child too.

OP is your real name Katie Hopkins?

Most 3 yr olds have a free nursery place for at least a morn/aft every day. How do they survive? All those kids indoors and out. Going to the toilet on their own. Minimal supervision with, what 10 to 15 kids per worker? What is the world coming to?

Oh no - even worse what about the kids in day care who are 18 months old or younger? Do they have one to one care, where their carer never takes their eyes off their charges? Their parents are paying for that care. They are all going to need to be sacked.