Nanny spotted reading magazine whilst child at playbarn

[zebedeethezebra]

AIBU to be annoyed at my nanny for reading a wedding magazine whilst 3 year old DS is at a playbarn, or do all nannies think it is reasonable to behave like this??

She was spotted by one of my friends the other week. I don't mind her having a coffee or something whilst she is there, but I expect her to keep an eye on DS, not have her nose buried in a magazine. Particularly on the money we pay her.

It would not bother me at all but that is not the point, it does bother you. I would handle it by telling her your friend saw your ds at the playbarn and she was looking out for you, then say no more and next time she might be worried incase you have your spies out again. I definitely would not raise it as a big issue.

I bet you didn't employ a nanny whisperer did you OP? If you had then you wouldn't have these problems

I am not a nanny btw, I employ one and I do not expect her to helicopter parent

YABU. When you take him to the playbarn do you watch him 100% of the time? What do you do when he disappears out of sight?

not sure what the relevance of the magazine being a wedding magazine is either - unless you would have been happy with a different magazine?!

relax

So the nanny can never take her eyes off the child for the entire time? Most jobs have tea breaks and soft play is the equivalent.

Get over it. If you were there with him I bet you'd have your nose in a magazine too. At 3 yo he is fine to be watched with a glance every now and then while she reads. He'd soon come and get her if there was a problem. Who has been telling tales btw? Sounds like they're stirring.

I'm not a nanny but until recently I employed one. YANBU

I wouldn't sit and read a wedding mag at my desk. You are paying her (a lot) to supervise and interact with your child.

Reading a mag during break time/nap time is ok

YABU and your friend who grassed the nanny up sounds like a shitstirrer and a twat.

at Leslie.

I'm assuming the reason you are annoyed is that as you are a decent employer and abide by the law, you are already providing her with regular breaks and lunch breaks and this incident was not within her break time?

Here's a thought, if you resent the fact that you pay her a descendent wage and she gets to read a magazine, why not look after your child yourself?

at Binky - maybe nanny should be forced to wear those eye-holdy-open things from A Clockwork Orange...

you are being totally unreasonable.

She was flicking through a magazine not freebasing crack

In my view, YANBU. I think 3 is too young to be left unattended at a soft play whilst a nanny is (I assume) sitting away from the child and not keeping an eye on what's going on.

But ultimately everyone will differ and I will be called a helicopter parent by others (my best friend for example!!).

I always make very clear to my nanny (in a friendly way) what I expect in terms of supervision dependent on where she tells me they are going - however, I also recruited a nanny that is a great big softy like me so she would often be more cautious than I would!!

There will be as many different opinions on this as there are posters...the key thing is are YOU bothered about it for YOUR 3 year old?

I tend to keep an eye on my 2 year old at those places, but don't follow him round.

When I have nannied for 3 year olds I have just let them loose.

Does your nanny have a clear break in the day when she is free to go out for lunch and not be responsible for your child? Does she work long hours?

Thought so. Nannies have to take a few minutes to themselves when they can as don't get a proper break like other employees are legally entitled to.

YABU

It's possible to read and supervise at the same time.

I'll go against trend here, and say that I wouldn't expect my nanny to do this. Wouldn't expect her to entertain the 3yo if they were happy playing, but I would expect her to keep an eye on him. I would keep watching my own 3yo in a soft-play centre too. Same in a playground.

But I must admit, I loathe most soft play places and don't go to them much.

A lifetime ago I worked as a nanny, I wouldn't have done this. It is someone else's child, you are paid, you don't read a magazine at work.

So, what is she supposed to do?

Sit with her eyes literally fixed on the child at all times?
Never look anywhere else, ever?

Is that even realistic?

Soupa, loads of people read magazines at work. Many people have up to an hour every day to do so.

Sack her immediately.

You remind me of

is this one of those joke threads?

It is perfectly possible to flick through a magazine and keep an eye on a child at the same time.

She was spotted the other week? Has something else happened or is this the only thing you are unhappy with about her behaviour.

I think I'd want to know exactly how long her nose was in the magazine before I started to worry about this too much.

Gee I wonder how she's supposed to visit the loo if she has to have eye contact with your child at all times.

YABU the reason I brave softplay is to have a moment to myself to read a book or magazine. Is it reasonable to expect a nanny to be engaged with you DS every minute of the day?

Your friend is also BU to tell you.

What a lovely friend you have Op.
Sitting flickering through a magazine and it's a wedding magazine, so not a lot to read can be done while watching a child.