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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not understand why so many people are 'proud' of babies rolling over, crawling, walking etc?

284 replies

HiggsBoson · 27/01/2013 21:21

Unimportant bollocks I know, but humor me :)

I have a 3yo DD. Lately I'm noticing more and more people on facebook and in general conversation going on about how very proud they are that "DS rolled over" or "DD crawled"

As for toileting Hmm

I've always felt that pride is an ugly thing and hand on heart I have never been proud of DD Crawling, walking or taking a shit. I mean, these are human bodily functions and surely no reflection on your offspring's intelligence or your capability as a parent? So what's to be proud of?

Sure - when DD is a little older and does something for someone else of her own volition as an act of kindness, then yes, I might be proud of that. If she helps people and achieves happiness for herself and others then I might also be proud of her for that. But rolling? Nah.

Am I being a twat?

OP posts:
rhetorician · 27/01/2013 21:22

no, they are. YANBU.

NirvanaSmellsLikeTeenMother · 27/01/2013 21:26

YABU. I think it's something to be proud of when they learn something new Smile

Softlysoftly · 27/01/2013 21:27

YABU watching them achieve their milestones is a beautiful thing,watching DD2 at the moment just starting to crawl, her determined little face not giving in makes my heart flutter with pride. Watching DD1 learn her numbers and be so pleased and excited when I tell her she's right and I'm proud of her, is a wonderful moment.

Do I expect anyone else to give a shit? No. But to say I'm wrong to do so is twattery tbh.

God help your child if they have to be an altruistic philanthropist before you show a spark of pride in them.

Jeebs · 27/01/2013 21:27

Because you made that little person who is currently rolling over or just toddled over to where the biscuits are kept. For me its prude mixed with amazement that I grew that person, took care of them when they was completely helpless and now they're growing up.

Each to their own though.

KenDoddsDadsDog · 27/01/2013 21:28

You have never been proud of your child ? That's a bit twattish.

LingDiLong · 27/01/2013 21:28

YABU. Perhaps you are mistaking pride for boasting? It's perfectly understandable to feel proud of your child as they grow and develop and hit particular milestones. It's nothing to do with feeling it reflects on my child's intelligence or my capability as a parent. For example, I felt no less proud of my late talking child when they started to speak than I did of my early talking child. I felt my heart swell in exactly the same way. Somehow the fact that they are growing and developing seems like this amazing miracle. Slightly strange to be unmoved by that in my opinion.

greeneyed · 27/01/2013 21:29

YABU What Softly says exactly

Jeebs · 27/01/2013 21:29

*pride not prude. Bloody autocorrect

sausagesandwich34 · 27/01/2013 21:29

YANBU

when I interview people I always dread asking the 'what are you most proud of?' and they say it's having children

makes me cringe

lecce · 27/01/2013 21:30

YANBU if they are actually using the word 'proud'. I agree with you that all babies will do these things and they are therefore nothing to be proud of.

However, especially when it is your first baby, I think it entirely normal to be excited when babies reach these milestones and to bang on about it a bit. Maybe they're not really proud, even if they use the word, what they really could be saying is something along the lines of, "Wow! That's incredible, that little baby who has been unable to do anything until now has rolled over! How great's that!" I don't see anything twattish in that. It's exciting stuff, especially when it's your first and you have't really known any other babies either.

Alittlestranger · 27/01/2013 21:30

YANBU

MrsBW · 27/01/2013 21:31

There seems, among my friends, to be a plethora of parents posting daily updates on their little darling's potty training progress at the moment.

Anything else (walking, talking, crawling), fair enough; but potty training? Does any parent really think that anyone other than them is interested in that?

KenDoddsDadsDog · 27/01/2013 21:31

In a work interview sausage ?

RegularVoltaire · 27/01/2013 21:32

Yabu

My children make me proud every day.

Original poster
HiggsBoson · 27/01/2013 21:33

Yes of course I've been proud of DD Grin

However it's been for things like running over to comfort another hurt child, not taking a dump or walking.

OP posts:
GwendolineMaryLacey · 27/01/2013 21:33

Yep, you sound quite a lot of a twat. Your poor bloody kid. There is nothing ugly about being proud of something you've done. That's actually pretty bloody weird.

WhispersOfWickedness · 27/01/2013 21:33

I think it's because after the grimness of the first few months (or was that just me?!), it's quite a relief when they actually start doing stuff and it's the first tangible evidence that they are doing something of their own volition. It is pretty incredible what they learn in only a year TBH Smile
Having said that, I was a bit Hmm at the friend declaring on Facebook that her dd must be some sort of child genius for potty training at about 2yo, although maybe it was the sheer relief at seeing the back of nappies which made her say it Grin

Softlysoftly · 27/01/2013 21:34

So do you naysayers really look at your little child that's worked their heart out to achieve a new skill and think "yeah yeah every fucker can do that , come to me when you've proper achieved something".

Although I have to say sausages that's a terrible answer to an interview question.

MrsBW · 27/01/2013 21:34

Yep, you sound quite a lot of a twat. Your poor bloody kid

Really? Hmm

MrsWolowitzerables · 27/01/2013 21:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Kiriwawa · 27/01/2013 21:35

What is weird is thinking that anyone else gives a shit. Be proud, jump up and down, call the other parent to announce the news. But don't imagine anyone else cares. Don't post on facebook, please.

YANBU at all.

threesocksmorgan · 27/01/2013 21:37

your being a twat Grin
but then I have a child that didn't pass all the milestones....
I happily share when she says a word at 17

Original poster
HiggsBoson · 27/01/2013 21:37

Yes - it's the sharing that seems unnecessary.

GwendolineMaryLacey Grin Pride can be a horrible thing, of course it can.

OP posts:
andtheycalleditbunnylove · 27/01/2013 21:37

hand on heart I have never been proud of DD

everything a baby is and does is worthy of love and pride from all around her. be proud of your daughter. be proud of her now, and every day. you won't be able to go back and make it up to her later.

Fakebook · 27/01/2013 21:37

In answer to you question: Yes you are being a twat.

Why can't people be happy for their child's milestones? How does it affect you? If you weren't happy when your dc first smiled or crawled then you must be one odd person.