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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that DH is having a wank...

186 replies

Hobnobber · 22/12/2012 23:43

Right now. In the bathroom. Downstairs.

I'm not 100% sure but he's gone in there with his mobile (like he does when he goes in for a número 2, but he never "goes" at night. He thinks I am sleeping as I came up to bed about 30-40 minutes ago.

The wanker.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hobnobber · 23/12/2012 00:59

I'm pretty 1000% sure she means me inAir!!!

OP posts:
ClippedPhoenix · 23/12/2012 01:02

Yes I did and beyond Grin
But i guess if you need to do this stuff?

AnAirOfHopeInAManger · 23/12/2012 01:02

Good because i had my buns ready. You cant go round calling people twits because they have a different point of view than you.

vintageviolets · 23/12/2012 01:03

A twit a woo

Is he still in there?

AnAirOfHopeInAManger · 23/12/2012 01:03

Ok you can but its not very nice and it hurts their feeling.

AgentZigzag · 23/12/2012 01:04

I don't mind saying I'm a bit of a twit.

I'm a bit worse than a twit tbh, but I don't give a toss.

MaggieMaggieMaggieMcGill · 23/12/2012 01:04

I really want to know now, op, just go and ask him, then report back!

Softlysoftly · 23/12/2012 01:06

O M G Xmas Shock.

I've just figured it out.

He's mumsnetting from the loo, dirty dirty boy, he's clippedphoenix.

youse in trouble op.....

AnAirOfHopeInAManger · 23/12/2012 01:06

We need to know. Go ask and report back what his answer is Xmas Grin

ClippedPhoenix · 23/12/2012 01:06

I feel sad for you to have to come on line and make things up. Its not smart nor funny, it's needy and i wish at christmas i could help you.

Original poster
Hobnobber · 23/12/2012 01:06

What? So you're glad clipped called me a twit instead of you. Fine. Pass me those buns you brought out, I will have to throw them myself!! even though she did say "and beyond", which meant you too

OP posts:
vintageviolets · 23/12/2012 01:07

Can we stop twitting please & focus on 'The job in hand'

Marzipanface · 23/12/2012 01:07

Has he come out yet? If my DH was in a locked bathroom with the lights off for over an hour I would be knock to check he is ok.

ClippedPhoenix · 23/12/2012 01:08
Grin
Original poster
Hobnobber · 23/12/2012 01:09

No he is out and downstairs. His phone is in his pocket.

How should I broach the subject?

OP posts:
Marzipanface · 23/12/2012 01:10

Get up, go downstairs for a drink and ask if he is alright.

vintageviolets · 23/12/2012 01:10

What are you both doing downstairs? You were both in bed an hour ago Grin is he watching t.v?

ClippedPhoenix · 23/12/2012 01:10

depends on the hands and the penis really... are they small or is the penis small? or can it just not happen?

Original poster
Hobnobber · 23/12/2012 01:11

Clipped - you are coming across as more jovial.

What did you do to relieve your frustration?

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 23/12/2012 01:12

How about 'Sooo...did you have a wank when you were in the bog with your mobile for so long Darling Husband? - Everyone On The Internet wants to know' OP.

Get y'sen downstairs then...

Original poster
Hobnobber · 23/12/2012 01:14

I am in bed and he is downstairs watching TV.

I asked him if he is ok and he said he is fine thanks, why am I asking?

OP posts:
vintageviolets · 23/12/2012 01:16

I thought he may have fallen asleep in the loo Grin
www.google.co.uk/search?tbm=isch&source=mog&gl=uk&tab=wi&q=man%20asleep%20on%20toilet&sa=N&biw=320&bih=416#i=13

Is this him?

AnAirOfHopeInAManger · 23/12/2012 01:16

I laught too much and wake my baby up now i have to feed her again Sad
(She keeps bitting my nipples and grinning)

AgentZigzag · 23/12/2012 01:17

'I asked him if he is ok and he said he is fine thanks, why am I asking?'

There you go, he's handed you the opening on a platter.

AgentZigzag · 23/12/2012 01:18

She'd only have woken up just after you'd gone to sleep else Manger.