to dump my BF for going with a prostitute...

[snailfiddler]

... 24 years ago.

On a lads holiday to Amsterdam.

the poor cow he bought?? he didn't buy anyone. he paid to have sex with her. he didn't buy her. I think it might be good to look at where the patriarchal view that a woman who has had sex has been bought or has a claim on her. do you think women give away sex too?

I have known several prostitutes and strippers too. On the surface they can appear to be the "happy hooker type" But actually, scratch the surface and there is no such thing.
Put it this way; would any man be ok with his daughter growing up and "choosing" to sell her body?
Probably not. Or maybe, if that man has himself been raping his daughter since she was 7. Prostitutes do not have happy backgrounds. They just dont.
Sure, some men will decide that any sex is better than no sex. But not all. No-one "needs" sex.
Human slavery and trafficking is a huge problem, not just in places like Thailand, but all over Europe too. No man can know for sure that the transaction is undertaken willingly by the woman (or more likely the young girl) and so it is totally immoral to use prostitutes. If the demand is not there, the supply of abused and damaged females will cease.

25 years, 24 years, 20 years

gosh, it's all getting a bit muddled

linda..read my posts

am I telling the Op what to do, in no uncertain terms ?

no, I am saying that she would not be U to dump on these grounds (but it's up to her)

you (and many others on this thread), on the other hand, are barking orders at her

do you think women give away sex too?

Of course not, as should be bloody obvious from my posts.

Focus on the men paying the money, not the women who take it. Focus on why men feel that anything can be bought at a price.

Why lump all men together not every man uses prostitutes, same as not every women sells sex.

superstar How is having sex with a consenting stranger the same as having sex with a stranger you're potentially raping?

anything can be bought for a price though.

That doesn't mean it's right to do so strumpet.

anything can be bought for a price though.

If there's little or no demand for it, no it can't - at least not without some difficulty. If society pronounces it's wrong to want to buy something, it's even more difficult.

fridge I'm not sure you have proved your point there

this inadequate bloke you are waxing lyrical about paid a woman to overlook the fact he was an inept fuckwit with no experience of women, but sleep with him any way to "pop his cherry"

he might as well have used an apple pie, or a hole in a public toilet wall

But just look at that story.

There must be as many women as men in that same situation. Do they go looking to pay for sex to lose their virginity and to learn how to deal with men?

Do they fuck - because women aren't raised to think they are entitled to buy the use of another's body.

he paid her to "forget" that she didn't fancy him

he didn't give a shit that she didn't fancy him

ergo...he didn't give a shit

badinage "women aren't raised to think they are entitled to buy the use of another's body"

I think that's really offensive to any MNetters who have sons. Or indeed any mother who has had a son. Do you honestly think they raise to think they can use and abuse women?

Alis, I don't think badinage meant specifically mothers are raising sons to be users of women's bodies...I reckon she means more of a society/peer pressure/media-driven thang

but something is creating these entitled men, isn't it ?

It is,in some men's cases yes.

The use of the word raises may well just be simplistic in that quote.

As my own anecdote,the only man I actually know to have used prostitutes (habitually) is possibly the most unpleasant man I have ever met. I thought that before I knew about his use of prostitutes. He hates women,particularly and especially young women. Doesn't like his wife to wear makeup and actively stops her wearing it etc.

*he's the only man I personally know to have used prostitutes. The habitually in brackets doesn't make what I'm saying very clear but I mean,he also used them habitually. Not that I know lots of men who have and he's the only one I know who has done habitually.

I don't know any men that use prostitutes at this present time, or have done

I expect some people will tell me I am thick and deluded or summat, since it's so like common 'n' that

I have been aware that one or two men of my acquaintance have done. They were very quickly removed from my acquaintance which was a relief on both sides, I am sure.

"Do you honestly think they raise to think they can use and abuse women?"

Not deliberately, but yes many women do raise their sons that way.

Look at this thread, mostly populated by women, the vast majority insisting that "flexibility" over getting a woman's consent to sex is an understandable youthful indiscretion that must be forgiven.

Look at all the threads with women insisting that paying women for sexual performances (aka "lap" dancing) and masturbating to images and videos of women being sexually assaulted (aka porn) are expected male behaviours.

The women who believe these things are raising children to believe them too. Although the children obviously have other influences and minds of their own.

That Coleen Nolan person bought her son a jump with a prostitute for his 16th birthday, didn't she ?

AF - I didn't think I knew any either until it came out this man had. As far as I know and sincerely hope,none of the other men in my social circle have done.

Alis, I trust you have cut him out forthwith

I think she did or at least offered to AF. I remember her trying to justify that on the television and in the newspapers. Wonder if she feels the same way now she has a young daughter?

That's an unbelievably fucked up thing to do. Teenage boys shouldn't be forced in to being fuck machines by anybody let alone their own mothers. I think the long term implications of sex at a young age can be very damaging for teenage boys,as they can be for some teenage girls.

I think there are some parents (fathers as well as mothers - you only mentioned mothers in your post) who raise boys to have different standards about sex than those given to daughters, including the right to pay for sex. But obviously I don't think the parents of every son do this. It's not just parents who raise children though and give them their values - society and the beliefs within it shape them.