To be disgusted by the criteria for free childcare for 2 year olds

[LowToleranceMamma]

So because I'm not 'poor' enough, I'm not entitled to childcare for my 2 year old, even though I am really struggling with PND and a baby. We can't afford to pay for it.

I had 15 month old twins,a newborn and PND-I got Homestart which was fab.

TBH I think if the gov gave out free childcare for every new mum struggling it would cost a fortune.

Are you getting the PND treated?I'd focus on that.You should be able to get counselling,medication or a course such as I went on for free.

I did the course thing which was fab(they had a free creche although hearing my 3 all screaming down the corridor didn't help to begin with).

Sorry you are struggling op, I was in your position a few years ago, it's tough. But honestly, since there is not enough money for all 2 yr olds, it's right that it's means tested. We moved house to reduce our bills, which means now dc 3 has come along we can (just) afford 2 mornings a week for dc2. Dh ears 32k for a family of 5, with mortgage. Times are hard, we just all have to cope.

Ask to be referred to the mental helth team if the PND is ongoing. They might be able to access some more support for you. A friend from a baby group got funding for her dc to go to nursery due to severe PND. This was before the 2 year old funding came in, though, and I don't know the details. There might be further help out there if you shout loud enough.

YANBU
Society should value and support mothers more. I hope the advice you get on this thread is helpful

it has more to do with disadvantage than low income in my area I know a few mums whos toddlers get free places due to illness and mental health issues I also know children who go because their is no money for groups and such like so they get a free place , would you really want a child suffering because of parents circumstances , speak to your health visitor or doctor if you feel your 2 yr old needs a nursery place

It had to be repeated because people chose to ignore it and just carry on with saying how disgusting it was that people on benefits got free childcare.

How sad you must feel not to be poor enough for something. Unfair, isn't it?

no home start in my area.

I believe you it is not just because of low income at all plenty of people with low income don't have free places because they are poor,

no home start in my area.

really ? i am shocked at that I found 20 odd schemes in London earlier , not that you live in london where do you live roughly

Sadly the referrals I make have to be receiving certain benefits but that does include WTC.
BUT they also need to be in a disadvantaged situation, some very sad ones

MrsDeVere - what factors do you look at?

And for those saying its not for the parents - I klnow that. Do you think its good for my chil;dren to be around such an incompetent, shit mother???

Mrsjay - newcastle

still doesn't expect to be listened to but shares anyway>

one of my children got into nursery at 3 because of my pregnancy problems and illness, ( this was before the free 3 yr old places for all )

In my area you have to meet income criteria PLUS other forms of disadvantage like the child has SN, or a parent has a disability.

YABU to be disgusted. The criteria is based on years of research into child development. The research has shown a correlation between being from a disadvantaged background and being behind in development BEFORE you even start school. It is to help kids get a good start in life. The measures of disadvantage are not just based on income, either.

Anyway, I hope you get the help you need.

I'm sure your not shit, your doing your best but sadly there are many children living in some awful situations.
We got a 2 year place for dd2 because dh has cancer and her sister has autism, she also was being considered for a dx of autism.
We had to fight for a place too, which we took for a while but then had to pay £30 a session for a specialist nursery, as LA won't fund that at all!!

you are not a shit mother at all do you have surestart in your area at all ?

so if my husband sat on his arse all day, we'd have free childcare

at the moment im wondering whether my kids wouldnt be better off withjout me (not in a suicidal way but in an adoption way)

I really think you need to talk to somebody asap you are very negative and struggiling please go to your GP how old are your children ,