worried about social services

[mysecretworld]

i have heard in the news alot of bad press about childrens social services. can any social workers in here put my mind at rest and tell me what the reasons are for removing a child ?

It does sound like she is unable to make safe choices about partners hence putting her son at risk. Surely you can see that and understand that until she is in a position to keep her son safe then actually he is better off not with her?

Is he in prison now?

has she a mobile phone, internet access, maybe been going on dating sites? clutching at straws really

Well, if your solicitor 'can't understand' why a child was taken into care, sack him now, get someone who does 'understand' and fight your case.

Otherwise I am afraid I shall simply assume you are not telling us everything and what your solicitor has said is something very different.

You were there at the time yes? What exactly happened when they came in, what did they say? How did you and your daughter react?

yes he is in prison at this moment in time. she has got a mobile but it a cheap one which does not have internet on it.

she was safe and protecting the baby when she was in the unit so there was no reason for them to take the baby when they did.

Were you there at the exact time the police officer took your grandson?

If the solicitor an't understand it then ask what they are able to do about it. If you aren't happy with the lack of response go and see another solicitor. Without having access to the evidence the no one on here can give you useful advice.
It's always possible that yours is the one case where the police, social worker (plus the team manager and service manager who will need to agree), children's guardian and magistrates all got it wrong however I think it's more likely that you are not really getting the issues. If you can't see why the problem is then you can't support your daughter to make the necessary changes.

I'm going to make some guesses.
You were not in "the unit" when the baby was taken.
So it is entirely possible that your daughter has lied to you about what was happening at the exact time your daughter was taken.

Make an urgent appointment with your solicitor on Monday.

Ask for it to be explained very clearly WHY the order was made, at what stage of the court process you are now, what your daughter has been asked to do so show she can parent safely and whether or not you can apply to intervene/ be party.

I am afraid I think only one of three things are going on here
You know exactly what the problem is but you can't face it so you want to go down the Forced Adoption/Ian Joseph line 'all SS are baby snatchers'
OR You don't understand what is happening and you desparately need some good advice and some explanation you can follow
OR There has been a dramatic and serious breach of domestic and international law which needs to be put right ASAP

yes i was there when they took him. my daughter was extremly upset as was i and all that was said was (by the police officer)we have reason to believe this baby is at risk of harm and is being taken on a ppo. the social worker then took him from my daughter and i said could he not go home with me and she said i was not capable because of his age and myself being in a wheelchair. they they walked out with him

You need to talk to your solicitor about this, not faceless people on the internet. Something is going on that you need to understand.

I keep repeating - police don't take out ppo orders for giggles. There really isn't some secret State quota to snatch babies for the middle classes.

But if I am wrong and a horrible mistake has been made here, you need to be dealing with this in court, not on the internet.

Can I ask Spero if risk of emotional abuse is used in cases where it is feared a mother will not keep her child safe from dv? Or is it about how the mother directly treats the child?

Spero is talking sense and is giving you the best advice you can be given. You aren't going to find the answers on here, you need good legal advice as quickly as possible. You either aren't getting it currently or aren't listening to it.

You say that there were only a couple of incidents of DV since baby was born ... but what about during the nine months she was pregnant? Were they together during this time? Were there incidents of physical abuse whilst she was carrying her baby?

Yes, I would expect risk of child being exposed to DV could come under heading of 'emotional abuse' - also possibly physical abuse because there is always a risk a child gets caught up in violence.

I have had a lot of cases where parents were pulling at a baby in the middle of an argument, each trying to get hold of it. Older children often try to intervene and protect their mothers.

What gets me irritated as the Forced Adoption lot and He Who Shall Not be Named lest his claxon goes off in his bat cave, continually bleat that 'risk of possible emotional harm' is the test for removal. It isn't - it is risk of signficant harm and emotional harm can definitely come under that category.

Personally I think emotional harm is one of the worst - broken bones mend but the damage done to a child who is constantly belittled, or who feels scared or is constantly hearing/seeing violence is immense and life long.

Sorry, don't think I directly answered the question - yes a mother who can't protect her child from exposure to DV may find that her child is removed.

I know that sounds harsh as I appreciate very often the mother is a victim. But the LA will try to help the mother, at least on the first relationship. There are dv programmes such as the Freedom Programme. They will try to rehouse, encourage mother to take out injunctions etc. Police are usually very good and can fit panic alarms etc.

But after the second, third, forth violent relationship or after repeated incidents of violence in one relationship, mother letting abuser back in the house for eg then the focus has to be on protecting the child and keeping him/her safe.

I am afraid I do agree with Erin Pizzey who said that some women chose violent relationships. I don't know if it is a self esteem issue and they just want to be with someone and let themselves get treated like shit but by the time I meet my clients they have usually had a string of toxic violent relationships. It is often worse than drug addiction for helping people get through it.

It certainly isn't helped if friends and relatives are in denial and trying to blame SW and police who are doing their jobs.

You need to report the post where you name your grandson.

SPERO i hope that was not a dig at me because i did my best to help her get out of the bad relationships she has had and put her up in my home when she finally left them.

there were no dv while she was pregnant. he seamed to lay off while she was pregnant.

Have reported it already, HappyG.

Is the fact that her daughter is only 19 going to make a difference in this particular case?

Sorry, I am not intending to have a dig at you.

But I am worried that something is going on here that you are not explaining or which you don't understand. The law exists to protect children and to try to ensure that strict legal tests are met before a child is removed from his/her parents. Everyone agrees that this is one of the most severe interventions in a person's life that the State can sanction.

Yes, things can go wrong because people are fallible and make mistakes. If that is what has happened here, these mistakes absolutely have to be rectified asap. Your grandson desparately needs to attach to some loving safe adult figure, not be bounced around foster carers. If his mum can care for him safely she absolutely should be the one doing it.

So please, please, please go and see your solicitor asap.

Either a horrible mistake can be rectified or you and your daughter can be helped to understand why it is so important to work with the social workers, not start some horribly misguided 'fight' with them because some diabolical and wicked websites/individuals want to stir you up to do this.

So your solicitor can't understand why an extremely drastic and draconian power was exercised, and he is now doing what exactly?

Sitting around saying "Hmm, that's odd. I can't understand why that has happened."

Either you have a particularly laid back and disinterested solicitor or there is a whole lot more to this story.

And did you mean to name the child on a public forum?

If she is 19 and this is her first baby, she is going to get a lot more sympathy and get a lot more slack cut than if she was 29 and this was her fifth.

no i didnt mean to name him on here and i wish i hadnt. we have an appointment with the solicitor monday so will be having stern words with him about what has been said to me on here.