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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

worried about social services

215 replies

mysecretworld · 27/10/2012 17:28

i have heard in the news alot of bad press about childrens social services. can any social workers in here put my mind at rest and tell me what the reasons are for removing a child ?

OP posts:
BadgersBottom · 27/10/2012 19:10

OP I think it would be helpful if you answered the post from *
ISeeDeadFairies*

BrittaPerry · 27/10/2012 19:11

Is it possible that they won't let you be a carer because the ex came to your house to attack your daughter? So your house isn't seen as safe?

BrittaPerry · 27/10/2012 19:12

Was the ex there when the baby was taken from the unit?

Eurostar · 27/10/2012 19:12

Do try the doctors too. Nearly all NHS therapy is short term which might not be enough for her but if the GP at least gets her in touch with the local therapy service they can tell her about other services. Whereabouts in the UK are you?

How old is she? It's great that she has your support but she needs to want to do this stuff herself otherwise it won't help her.

ISeeDeadFairies · 27/10/2012 19:12

Something tells me you won't get a response badgers

rainbowinthesky · 27/10/2012 19:13

You said there were 3 incidences of dv against your dd from this man.

Jomato · 27/10/2012 19:13

There is no way the police would have granted a ppo without the child being in imminent danger, a court would also be unlikely to grant a ico without the parent having opportunity to contest it in court. There has clearly been a significant incident which either you are not telling us or she is not telling you.
If an ico has been granted there will be a statement from the social worker outlining exactly what the concerns are and what the event were which led to ppo. I would suggest you ask your daughter to show you this. If you are genuinely wanting advice on how best to handle the situation there are plenty of people here who can help but you need to give the whole story.

Original poster
mysecretworld · 27/10/2012 19:15

Is it possible that they won't let you be a carer because the ex came to your house to attack your daughter? So your house isn't seen as safe?

it may be yes but thats not whats on the statement from the social worker.

Was the ex there when the baby was taken from the unit?

no the only people there apart from the unit staff were myself and my daughter.

OP posts:
LineRunner · 27/10/2012 19:15

I do agree, OP, that you need to ask to see and read the orders. You can't rely on a 2nd hand account.

ISeeDeadFairies · 27/10/2012 19:16

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

purplequiche · 27/10/2012 19:17

Who called the Police OP?

Had either of you had a drink?

Nuttyprofessor · 27/10/2012 19:18

I would get a restraining order on the ex. Talk to the social worker and ask what you would need to do. Your DD can ask to see the files they have on her, she has the right to read and correct any errors.

I have been to hell when SS tried to remove my DGC over one accidental injury. Since baby p they have become ridiculously over enthusiastic to remove babies.

The social worker mispresented information to make my DD fit his criteria for removing a child. It was only the chairwoman of the family court that prevented this happening.

I safeguarded for 6 weeks, if I hadn't they would have been removed during that time while they did their investigations. The whole family have been offered counselling for the trauma they put us through.

One example doesn't keep medical appointments. DD missed 2 out of 36.

Child has an injury that cannot be proved to be accidental, 1 injury in third of three children over four years.

We are lucky, if I can say that oldest DGD has special needs and therefore sees many health professionally. We got these and GP and teachers to attend the family court and give evidence. Yes I fought Social Services. Those that think you don't have to are lucky. If it ever happens to them they will be as shocked as I was.

Original poster
mysecretworld · 27/10/2012 19:21

it says in the order that....

the key issues in the case are....
the local authority alleges that the child was at risk of suffering significant harm
the harm the local authority specifically alleges is :
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx was at risk of emotional harm from the parents behaviour.

OP posts:
MrsDeVere · 27/10/2012 19:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LineRunner · 27/10/2012 19:23

There is apparently a restraining order, Nutty.

You are right it is only a court that can remove a child, with the rare exception of a Police Protection Order in emergency circumstances.

BadgersBottom · 27/10/2012 19:24

Ok. One more try. OP - here is the post from ISeeDeadFairies. I think your response to it would be helpful.

ISeeDeadFairies Sat 27-Oct-12 19:06:49

I am a sw. I'm sorry but I just don't buy this. A ppo means there was actual immediate risk of significant harm so something must have happened at the unit if this is where baby was taken from.

Either your daughter is lying to you or your lying to us

ISeeDeadFairies · 27/10/2012 19:24

Ppo are ONLY issued in extreme cases where child is at risk of significant and immediate harm. Eg they see child being beaten etc. something must have happened for this to be granted or police would not have removed. They are not allowed

maddening · 27/10/2012 19:24

Could you move to your daughters house and provide joint care - so your daughter can provide physical care but you would be there to ensure no contact with ex?

Original poster
mysecretworld · 27/10/2012 19:28

ISeeDeadFaries

I am a sw. I'm sorry but I just don't buy this. A ppo means there was actual immediate risk of significant harm so something must have happened at the unit if this is where baby was taken from.

NOTHING HAPPENED AT THE UNIT, THE DAY THEY TOOK HIM WE HAD FED HIM, HE WAS CLEAN, BATHED THAT DAY AND WAS BATHED EVERYDAY.

OP posts:
Shesparkles · 27/10/2012 19:28

OP can you confirm if there have been 1 or 2 DVD incidents since the baby's birth?
My understanding is he assaulted your dd when the baby was 3 days old, which led to your dd and the baby coming to stay with you. The ex then came to your housing assaulted your dd again.
Have I got this right?

Nuttyprofessor · 27/10/2012 19:30

With my grandson SS phoned the police and told them to remove him. They came and got the children out of bed. If I hadnt been there they would have taken him.

It is ridiculous after one accidental injury.

They are three lovely well dressed well fed well educated middle class children. With two working parents. I know many of these points are not relevant but I think people think this happens to a certain type of person.

One day one has a minor accident and your whole world is turned upside down.

Original poster
mysecretworld · 27/10/2012 19:31

the dv at mine was for shouting and swearing and him kicking and punching the front door.

OP posts:
ISeeDeadFairies · 27/10/2012 19:34

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Jomato · 27/10/2012 19:35

So you are saying that the police swooped in and took a healthy and well cared for baby? If that is actually the case then the only explanation for that is that they must have had extreme concerns about the possibility of the baby being harmed by his father and assessed that your daughter would not or could not protect. That is the only explanation I can come up with for how this would have happened in those circumstances.

Original poster
mysecretworld · 27/10/2012 19:35

t says in the order that....

the key issues in the case are....
the local authority alleges that the child was at risk of suffering significant harm
the harm the local authority specifically alleges is :
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx was at risk of emotional harm from the parents behaviour.

OP posts: