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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for being upset that my DH used "our phrase" on Facebook?

198 replies

NCForNow · 27/08/2012 23:03

It's a phrase that we used when we had our first DC. A made up one. It's not something that I have ever heard anyone else use and we always said it in relation to our first DD.

Now one of his mates has had a baby and he put our phrase on the friends comments box under the photo of their baby.

I asked him why he'd done this..and he went mad as if I had picked on him for nothing. He said he never knew I'd be upset though he knew it was a phrase which had personal meaning and emotional attachment for me and for him.

I can't understand why he'd say that on stupid FB!! He barely comments on things usually!

OP posts:
Original poster
NCForNow · 27/08/2012 23:11

Oh piss off worra. No. It was nothing soppy. Pancake it is not that it is private but more that he used it about some other baby and Mother.

Puds I don't have many "things" with DH as he's just not very like that...I suppose this was one of few.

OP posts:
bumpertobumper · 27/08/2012 23:11

yes, annoying, but not worth having a big row about. He probably regrets doing it and is being defensive too.
Count to ten...

BeaWheesht · 27/08/2012 23:11

Look, you sound like a complete loon so unless you're going to tell us the phrase I'd just accept yabvu and leave it at that.

SugarBatty · 27/08/2012 23:11

You should have got a copyright done, left the bastard and sued him! Grin

Original poster
NCForNow · 27/08/2012 23:11

Delicious. Why come on to be twatty about it??

OP posts:
puds11 · 27/08/2012 23:11

Maybe he thought your DD had outgrown the phrase, and wanted to continue it with another baby.

He also maybe wrongly assumed that you wouldn't go bat shit insane about it.

wishiwassingle · 27/08/2012 23:12

Well, seeing as how your DH has posted this on FB you might as well tell us.
Might help to decide if you are BU or not.

crackcrackcrak · 27/08/2012 23:12

yanbu - i get you op

bisjolympics · 27/08/2012 23:12

LOL at the thought of an 8 yr old being 'especially gorgeous' Grin

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 27/08/2012 23:12

Ave officially heard it all now.

CoolaSchmoola · 27/08/2012 23:12

O....M.....G!!!

Get a GRIP! YABU. V. V. V.U

It's a phrase - ok so it's personal to you, but that doesn't ban him from saying it to anyone else ever ever ever. Nor does him doing so dilute the meaning to you when he goes say it. He clearly felt that phrase expressed what he wanted to say - and that's his perogative.

How old are you? "This is our phrase and you said to someone else!!" You sound like a teenager with her first (and soon to be ex) boyfriend. This is just weird.

Original poster
NCForNow · 27/08/2012 23:12

bumper thank you!

Bea I can't tell it! I have said that and I won't tell it.

I am a loon...I accept it. BUt I maintain that he "gave away" our thing for free and therefore took the meaning of it away.

OP posts:
Anonymumous · 27/08/2012 23:13

I'm not sure why it matters so much, to be honest. Unless it's something like, "Oh my, isn't she just the most gorgeous little girl in the whole wide world", in which case I would be miffed because everyone knows that your own child is always the most gorgeous.

puds11 · 27/08/2012 23:13

Ok, just read your last answer, and i can see why you would be upset, sorry for my twatishnes.

MmeLindor · 27/08/2012 23:13

Before everyone jumps in and starts ridiculing the OP, could you just stop and think for a moment. She is already upset.

Be kind. And if you can't be kind, don't post.

NCForNow
I do think that you are being slightly unreasonable. Your DH has become used to you using this phrase to express your love and joy at the birth of your DD, and so used it to convey his happiness that his friend will also have these feelings. It was not done maliciously, I am sure, and if he had known it would upset you then he would not have done it.

Although I am incredibly nosy to know the phrase now.

Original poster
NCForNow · 27/08/2012 23:13

bis why? Don't you ever think your DC are gorgeous?

OP posts:
D0G · 27/08/2012 23:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AThingInYourLife · 27/08/2012 23:15

"Pancake it is not that it is private but more that he used it about some other baby and Mother."

Ah, linguistic infidelity, I get it.

Oh no, wait. That's just stupid.

Original poster
NCForNow · 27/08/2012 23:15

Thank you MMeLindor. I am premenstrual so that may explain me getting silly.

I just felt that this was something we said. He's not the most demonstrative man nor is he very verbal about love and things and this phrase was significant. It "stood for" something.

OP posts:
MmeLindor · 27/08/2012 23:15

Bis
my DD is 10 yo and 'especially gorgeous'. What is so odd about that?

SugarBatty · 27/08/2012 23:15

he gave it away for free? Your right op, yanbu he should have charged them for the privilege.

maytheoddsbeeverinyourfavour · 27/08/2012 23:16

YABU

Original poster
NCForNow · 27/08/2012 23:16

Dog Grin I love MN. It does make me feel better when I am a bit crackers.

OP posts:
icecold · 27/08/2012 23:17

i dont think youy are being unreasonable
why did your dh use it re another baby? did he explain?

bisjolympics · 27/08/2012 23:17

Maybe it is a girl thing then. It just isn't a phrase I'd use for ds (8)!