Thanks for the replies.
To the poster who assumed i was young and only had one child... yes, dd is my only child but i'm in my thirties. Not sure if this is classed as 'young', though i hope so.
I'm not jealous either, i have a good job and earn good money. if i wanted to buy dd loads of things i could, i just choose not to as i worry about her being spoilt.
I grew up with five other siblings roughly the same age as me. Back then, my mum was a SAHM, there were no such thing as tax credits etc and my dad was on minimum wage.
We rarely got treats, or lots of money spent on us. We got the cheapest of the cheap and our yearly trip to the cinema on Christmas Eve was something i looked forward to all year!
When we all grew up, my parents then had my youngest brother. He's 13 now. When he was about 5, my dad got a new job and became rather well-off. i think my parents went a bit mad and spoilt him so much because they weren't able to when we were little.
My brother was at my house the other day and we got chatting. He told me he gets £15 a week pocket money for doing naff all. I was so shocked. When i was his age, i had a paperround and earned my own money. I then noticed he'd dropped a pound out his pocket and i tried to give him it back. He laughed and said 'don't be daft, it's only a pound, let X (my dd) have it'. Fair enough this was a nice gesture, but when i was his age, a pound was a fortune!
My mum gets him a computer game every month, new toys willy nilly, and then complains at Christmas and birthdays etc because she can't think of what to buy him.
In fact, i should have mentioned this in my op. When i confronted my dad about the dollshouse yesterday, he said my mum bought it because she felt guilty, as my brother was there too and getting a new computer game. So my mum didn't want dd seeing another child get something and her getting nothing! What a load of crap. She's in the shops several times a week with me and we see lots of people buying lots of nice things. Doesn't mean we have to get them too.
And yes, my mum's house is filled with toys and books and arts stuff for dd. In fact, i doubt there's any room for much else so goodness knows where she's planked this dollshouse. Each time she buys dd something, she ALWAYS send it back home with her, so i don't see why she'd suddenly decide to keep this one at her own home unless it's to stop me knowing about it.
My dd sees her GP's about 1-2 times a week. And yes, at least one of these days my mum takes her into the city and out for lunch and she usually comes back with a toy. At least once a month its a big toy like this dollshouse, last month it was something from the disney shop. Other times, it's toys approx £2 etc.
I really think it is starting to affect my dd because every time we go into a shop, she asks for something. When i say no, she gets upset and asks why not? Please? Why not? She keeps pestering. My parents just can't say no to her.
I'd much rather she ended up like me when she's older, knowing the real value of money, than like my youngest brother.
My mum just doesn't listen when i say no. Every summer and winter, she pops up with (and i'm not kidding) a FULL wardrobe of clothes for dd from Next. It must cost her a fortune. Of course, i'm grateful and realise i'm lucky about this, but I want to buy dd clothes too. However, i don't see the point when she doesn't need them because my parents have already got her too much. DD is now five and i've only been able to get her the odd outfit here and there, because my mum always gets in there first and buy things. This summer, i've put my foot down and said no, or i'll seriously fall out with them over it. And if they insist, then the clothes will have to stay in their house as i really don't have the space. (Her clothes fill her double wardrobe and drawers and half my wardrobe). So then my mum gave me a Next giftcard instead with £250 on it! She doesn't even need clothes. Half the stuff my mum bought her last summer are too big and only now fitting her.
She also took the huff becaue i wouldn't let her buy all of dd's school uniform. This is dd going into P.1 - first year at school - and i was all excited about getting her uniform, bag etc. My mum said 'fine. I'll put money on a gift card. That way i'm paying for it, but you'll still be buying it. I'll drop it off next week.' So that day, i ran out and bought all her uniform before she had chance to get the giftcard. Might sound childish, but i really didn't want her money. Even though it's a giftcard, she'd still be interfering and dictating how much i should spend and what shop to buy from. I tried compromising beforehand by saying she can get her blazer, or shoes etc, but this wasn't good enough, she wanted to buy it all.
Sorry. I've gone off on a rant. I just wish they'd respect my wishes a bit more.