What would be your DCs current AIBU post

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Mini Safari (DD 6 months): AIBU to want to play and chat with DM and use her as a climbing frame whil still attached to her nipple from 3-6am. She seems to think I should sleep at night O_o.
Then at 7:30am while she was yawning over her coffee, and I was coverd head to toe in yog and doing my best Chewbacca impression she didn't even think it was slightly funny when I threw a lump of half chewed yog coverd banana in her face.
Then she tried to give me a bath to clean off said yog and calm me down, I have no idea why, I was perfectly happy to spend the day coverd in my breakfast. I then did an epic poomagedon in the bath, and was most proud with my copious achievement. Then she even shouted at the dog who bundled it's way through the door to try and clean me up as I made my escape from miserable DM across the bathroom floor still coverd in watery poo and yog while she ran a fresh bath and mumbled something aboud DF still being in bed after sleeping the whoel night through.
Now I'm napping peacefully on her tummy and she really needs a wee but if she puts me down or removes her nipple from my mouth, I will of course wake up and be in a shocking mood for the rest of the day.
INU am I, to think there's just no reason she can't function any better than a miserable zombi?

AIBU to want to play on my XBox when my friends are not out or the weather is rubbish?

AIBU to want to go to KFC or McDs for lunch every day?

Luke, aged 10.

Yes son, I think you are!!!

AIBU >run away<

giggle<
fall over<
WAHHHHHHHHHHHH!

AIBU to want to win/ be right all of the time actually don't answer that I know I am not bu!!! (DD age 6yo)

DS 3.5: I DID NOT NEED A WEE ALL MORNING! AIBU to forget a little bit about going for a wee? AI really BU to wait until we were at Daddy's posh friend's posh house and then piss all over her brand new conservatory? I was busy ffs.

AIBU to never ever sleep during the day cos my two big brothers don't nap and I don't see why I have to, even though I spent my lunch time refusing my veggie pasta because I was too exhausted to chew and I almost fell asleep in my yoghurt. I mean I'm nine months old next week so I'm a big girl and I'm crawling and stuff so I've got a living room to rearrange and it takes time to empty all those boxes onto the floor.

DS 7 AIBU to think that my DM is completely thick. I think I'm right to question absolutely everything she asks me to do or to just ignore her or simply refuse to do it. I don't need to brush my teeth twice a day, go to bed, leave my sister alone or have a bath and it's perfectly fine to bounce balls as high as I can in the kitchen.

DD 2 AIBU to refuse all meals and demand milky and lollies all day? AIBU to wake up and try to climb in with DM and DF and then say "Daddy go" and then want Daddy back when he does go and then want mummy to go? There's just not enough room for all three of us and I can't decide who I want to cuddle. I don't understand why they get so cross AND THEN EXPECT ME TO SLEEP ON MY OWN. Bastards.

DD 9 - AIBU to this this is SO UNFAIR! Why the hell should I have to go to bed at 9:45, it's the school holidays FFS. I mean, all I wanted was some cuddles with mum and I'm not even tired and.........

DD: AIBU to eat every scrap/packet of chocolate, cake, crisps, sweets, treats, bread for the packed lunches I can lay my hands on? After all, if my mother didn't want me to eat them she woud surely do a better job of HIDING them all? OMG!

DS (7) AIBU to climb up this 40 foot tree/go on my skateboard/bike/the monkey bars when my arm has only been out of plaster for 2 weeks and the doctor said I have to be 'careful'? (What does that word mean anyway?)