regarding facebook pics

[pokeypants]

I will confess to being a bit wary of putting too much on sites like facebook especialy when it comes to my children, there are so many sicko's about and some people just don't seem to realise the dangers. But I have tried not to become over cautious and reasoned that a few snaps of the kids on there is fine as both me and my partner are sensible and only have actual friends or family viewing our profiles.... I am however rather annoyed to find my niece has been taking my pictures of our little girl and adding them to her own profile....which i know seems harmless but she is a typical teenager and has upwards of a thousand so called friends on her list most of whom I'm guessing she doesn't actually have a clue who they are so we our little girls pics are practicaly public viewing!! Am i over reacting? I have simply asked that she not do it with our pictures, but maybe we should not put anything on there in future ourselves incase. what do other mumsnetters think to this?

what harm has come to people that have their image on the internet?

I went to an the City of London museum last year to see photographs of normal people on the streets of london in the 1860's, I don't see it does harm if these photos last for 150 years.

Oh I would remove one if someone asked me to and don't post pics of friends kids or name friends kids or relatives kids.

But I give them one of these and ask them if they are serious.

I just don't think anyone (except my family and friends) would be at all interested in my child. So what if facebook knows my child loved trains when he was 3 or that his coming home from hospital outfit was red or that his first meal was mango.

I think the majority of children will open up their own social networking pages when they are teanagers, to be honest I would be more worried if my child said to me "I'm don't want a facebook page because I am worried about my info being sold" than some people I don't know seeing a photo of DC's first day at school.

Lot of people on this thread are not concerned about peado paranoia and still have excellent reasons for not wanting their DCs (or their own for that matter) pics on facebook. but this thread wasn't about people not wanting their child's pictures on the web, it was about wanting to have control of the photos. If you don't want your child's picture on the web don't pit it on the web.

Well Catgirl maybe your kid won't mind when he's at school and everyone can see his naked baby pics. It might be totally fine.
But the issue of online bullying in schools is a very serious one and those pics might just be a cause of distress for your DC at some point. Okay so chances are that it wont be a problem, but my point is that I really don't understand why people don't consider the privacy thing as important at all.

Love the strike out Silky

If you don't want your child's picture on the web don't pit it on the web.

Erm...

You get that other people put them there right? And if you're not even on facebook, you don't even know about it.

Rumple....why would his school friends be able to see his naked baby pics?

I don't think you understand how facebook works.

"If you don't want your child's picture on the web don't pit it on the web"

so if I don't want photos of my child on the web, I shouldn't put them on
but if I don't want YOU to put photos of my child on the web, I have no right to ask you not to put them on unless I disclose a child protection issue?

silkysmith I said I don't need a reason. I said to start with that "if someone said their child was protected".. or whatever but I was wrong I wouldnt expect them to tell me their problems.

I am not saying that I wouldn't remove and image, I am not saying that I wouldn't wait till a person was out of shot. I am saying that being so over the top about it (for those people who have no child protection issues) is in my opinion unreasonable, partly because we are all in the background of other people's photographs.

Tee2072 - "Find me one case of a child ever being abducted, molested, what have you, by a stranger, because of information they found on the 'net and only on the 'net and I'll eat my words

There was a high profile case recently of a girl being murdered after being groomed totally on FB. Children are groomed via FB. My DD's and all of her friends have been targeted at least once, so there are dangers.

Pictures have been found in sex offenders properties with ordinary children's heads (gotten off FB and other sites) imposed on pornographic images. So they have been wanked over, which some parents don't like the thought of, so it is their decision, to make.

However, i don't have a problem with posting pictures, with clothes on, especially if it is family that is doing it.

I wouldn't post naked pictures, because working in CP and being involved with criminal cases, i know what they can be used for and would not be comfortable with that.

If you don't want your dc photo on the web

dont take them outside of the house -ever

Birdsgottafly - could you link to the high profile case please

You get that other people put them there right? And if you're not even on facebook, you don't even know about it.

I do get that other people can put them there, but in this situation if OP had not put photos on the web there would be no issue.

I don't think you understand how facebook works.

Well I certainly had no idea what privacy settings you have on your facebook account. Okay granted, some stuff isn't immediately easily available to any casual person surfing the net, depending on your settings. But don't be too confident in it. Facebook keeps changing it's privacy policy, often without notice, so total faith in the system is misplaced.

This debate always entertains me & I'm with Tee - the paranoia is quite scary.

I love the quote from Paulo Coelho
"We wouldn't worry nearly as much about what others thought of us if we recognise how seldom they do."

I think this goes for most of the mind-numbingly dull stuff & photos people post on facebook.

I can't imagine that many of OP's nieces friends or even friends of friends will be the teenyist bit interested in her DD and the thought of a "sicko" actually taking the time to trawl through and look for a young child with its mother & actually do anything with it must be statistically insignificant.

It was covered on this morning and discussed on here. I will try to find it.

If you start to take notice of childporn cases, you will see that 'innocent' photos are often found alongside deliberate pornographic 'set up' pictures.

I unfortuately have to read the charges and sometimes see images, when they happen in my region.

YANBU. I just wanted to re-quote RumpleStiltzkin's very good post from earlier, which sums up the main problem with posting our children's photos on Facebook.
By the way, I work in social media - and journalism - and it's a great invention of the modern age. I also know that our children have rights. One of them is to privacy. I think they have a right to choose whether photos of them are published globally or not.

And catgirl1976 - it's not rocket-science (literally - I mean it's not basic knowledge, but neither is it extremely difficult) to hack into a Facebook account, and as years go by, it will become easier, especially given the viral distribution effect online which means photos will only become further dissipated. Anyway, future school friends, Facebook and all of its shareholders and partners already have permission to access those photos - and use them as they will - at any time.

c/o RumpleStiltzkin:

YANBU but it's got nothing to do with peado paranoia.

Many many babies born today will have an entire pictorial and circumstantial life history fully documented on Facebook before they are old enough to decide whether they wanted it or not, i.e they will be too late to do anything about it. And, despite so many peoples' foolish faith in online privacy settings, this will be un-delete-able (not a word apparently) and fully searchable, at the very least by the facebook corporation. With name and email tagging and linked friends and time lines of important dates etc. and so forth, the amount of information that this corporation will hold about these individuals, (potentially some/all added by other people who "don't see what the problem is") will be shocking.
Does this matter?
This information is extremely valuable to all sorts of people and organisations and can and will be used to make profit out of individuals, often without their knowledge or consent, and this process can do real harm. Taking info straight from facebook for news articles is one example. Insurance companies assessing the risk of ensuring you is another. Info being used against you in court cases. The list goes on.
Why do you think facebook is free but worth so many billions?

SilkySmith - that is the case on pretty much ALL websites iirr. To be honest it is the case on your computer too iirr. However, it still does not mean that Fb actually owns your photograph. They cover this in their own T&C as so many people seem to think it is the case, but it isn't.

www.prlog.org/10391203-girl-17-found-murdered-by-facebook-pre

Typo, meant to write 'Anyway, future school friends aside, Facebook and all of its shareholders and partners already have permission to access those photos - and use them as they will - at any time.'

If you don't want your dc photo on the web, dont take them outside of the house -ever

Plus other general, "we're all in other peoples' photos in the background so what's the problem" type comments.

That's ridiculous. There's a big difference between being in the background of a stranger's shot, and having your pic placed on facebook by someone you know.

Stranger's photo = no additional information. No one knows who the pic is of
Someone you know places photo = everything links up

No-one owns an image, unless it is copywrited according to the law of images, which i don't know the exact term, but i know from my work.

My DD has her own website, she is a part time child actress/model. I pay a fortune to own the images, it is sorted out via her agent for me.

"I do get that other people can put them there, but in this situation if OP had not put photos on the web there would be no issue" umm OR, if the OP didn't have a facebook account she just wouldn't KNOW about the issue

Agree that FB changes it's settings all the time often without warning, stuff I had as private I've had to go back in and re-protect because of changes that have happened since I've been on there

We don't really know what the future holds for our facebook info, but people are already being bitten in the arse by it (job interviews etc)

I found out when I tried that you cannot delete your OWN STATUS POSTS if they are old, but anyway as I've said deleting just hides it really.. If your DCs come to you and say "mum I really don't like that every milestone of my life is on your profile" - don't count on being able to do anything about it by then!

I'm still unlikely to befriend school children Rumple. So they won't be able to see my pictures.

I doubt either that an evil genius 8 year old will go to the time and trouble to somehow seek out DSs baby pics, perhaps by hacking my account or something just for bullying purposes.

And......even if he did, I am not sure DS would be distressed by the fact someone had a picture of him in the bath as a 3 month old baby. Given, you know, all babies are naked under their babygros and the naked body is nothing to be ashamed of. My hope would be he will have perfected the face, as would be required in such an odd situation.

I could be wrong. If he comes home from school in 8 years time in tear because Timmy has managed to hack my facebook account, gone through 8 years worth of someone elses pictures and triumphantly downloaded a pic of him in the tub aged 6 months and managed to torment him with the fact that he has skin and stuff under his clothes, shouting "kittenboy was a baby once, and at one point he had a bath, with no clothes on. OMG"... I will come back and apologise to you.

Ok, I need someone far more clever than I am, to talk me through how having photos on facebook will enable people & organisations to make profit out of me? I'm sure I'm being thick & missing something hugely obvious - but how does that work?