Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Husband problem-Wedding photography

209 replies

Moony33 · 19/07/2012 15:54

We've just got married and the whole thing had been a total nightmare. I've done virtually all the planning(though 90% of the cost was paid for by hubby) My husband has a brother who's a very experienced wedding photographer, but whom hubby also wanted as best man. My husbands brother has had a bad time of it lately so he thought it a good idea for him to do both roles and was told by a close family member that it "would break his heart" if he couldn't do both. I thought this was a terrible idea. When the photos arrived, despite a few good images, the quality was nowhere as near as good as I expected with a lot of the classic images missing and some bad quality shots I've now gone absolutly ape for days at my husband blaming him completly and have said the "marriage is deteriorating before our eyes". I've more or less demanded that he pay to get additional photos done and how he should have hired an external photographer but what makes me the most upset is that he took his brothers feelings over mine. I'm not sure I can forgive and forget until he pays for another photoshot. The photography was a wedding present but i'm so very upset.

OP posts:
WilsonFrickett · 19/07/2012 16:24

YABU. You kinda need to get over yourself, if I'm being honest. And it is traditional to spend the night before the wedding apart...

Kayano · 19/07/2012 16:25

Jesus wept.

Yabu

startwig1982 · 19/07/2012 16:25

A slight over reaction! I think maybe you should try being nice to your new husband and not be petty about a small thing. As others have already said, other guests will have some snaps. Time to get over it and move on!

Coconutty · 19/07/2012 16:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Blondeshavemorefun · 19/07/2012 16:28

obv must be a wind up

erm yes tradition says to not spend the night before wedding together

tradition also says no living in sin living together till legally wed

additional photos done?? as in you and your dh or do you want all the wedding guests to come back and pose??

and seriously if this is for real then if you are prepared to let your marriage deteriorate before your eyes then have a serious think as I would love my hubby to be back in my life but cant as he died - so if this is real get a bloody grip and count your blessings!!

Mindyourownbusiness · 19/07/2012 16:29

I worked wonders with a few borrowed memory sticks off guests at our wedding and a marvellous app called 'Paint' on my laptop.

Yes l opened any half potentially decent ones with 'Paint' and got rid of unwanted body parts, red eyes, fire exit signs, litter, wrinkles,spare tyre,m-i-l etc and ended up with a decent few framed photos and album.

HTH Grin

TheVermiciousKnid · 19/07/2012 16:31

This has a whiff of disingenuity about it.

DeWe · 19/07/2012 16:31

My dm's wedding photos were in b/w at a time when you'd expect them to be in colour.

My dgp assumed that they would be in colour, and the photographer assumed b/w, they didn't know until they came out.

My dm said that she was disappointed that they weren't in colour, but knew it was no one's fault, so never said anything. Now she jokes that she must have been fashionable as the rage is to have a few in b/w.

jamdonut · 19/07/2012 16:34

Disappointing, yes...but good grief! You are not paying for them, you said they were a wedding present! Find one good one put it in a frame, and keep the others to look at again in a few years time. I don't have any of my 'official' wedding pics framed at all...anyway, all the best ones were snaps taken by family.

Mindyourownbusiness · 19/07/2012 16:35

then l had a nosey at what else was on their memory cards (no juicy tales to tell l'm afraid - friends all boring ) then returned them Grin

tryingtonotfeckup · 19/07/2012 16:35

Mindyourownbusiness, could you do that with some of mine?

Seriously OP, assuming this is on the level, chill out, marriage isn't about a nice photo album. I did the majority of prep on the wedding, DH sorted out his suit, we both agreed on location and he did a playlist for the DJ. Oh yeah and he sorted out the readings for the wedding. Actually he did quite a lot, weird. We both paid for it though, he would probably argue he still is.

Redknickerswillstoptrains · 19/07/2012 16:36

What you are saying is you are only concerned with the superficial image of the perfect wedding,because if you are on the verge of ending your marriage over phots ,there is obviously nothing important in your relationship.

I think you need to get a grip,I got married 10 years ago and couldn't tell you where my pictures are.The marriage is the important bit not your wedding day.

TheBigJessie · 19/07/2012 16:36

[Clever remark impugning the truthfulness of this thread]

Babylon1 · 19/07/2012 16:38

Get a grip woman, how very materialistic and "showy" do you sound??

I actually feel very sorry for your DH and shouldn't wonder if he might be feeling a few regrets himself - but not about the photos, more about the actual wedding Confused

Hmm
MrsTerryPratchett · 19/07/2012 16:39

Would you like,

Nice pictures and a divorce

or

Crappy pictures and a marriage?

CinnabarRed · 19/07/2012 16:39

LTB. HTH.

MrsBucketxx · 19/07/2012 16:43

the op need a reality check. its sound like utter bollocks.

the had the nerve to spend the night before apart oh puurrrlease.

you should be grateful he married you at all with your attitude. i bet you have up your job too so you could be the little wife at home

fruitysummer · 19/07/2012 16:43

Bloody Hell

I got married last year, my photo's are still on a disc somewhere waiting to be looked at, I'm not really interested in them, because what interests me more is my marriage!!!

I feel sorry for your D owntrodden arling Husband

thebody · 19/07/2012 16:43

Yes get divorced now as clearly if this is how you behave over a simple thing then it's only fair to release your dh now!!

You won't last the course as you seem to have no idea of the meaning if a marriage!

Perhaps it was all about the wedding dress and photos?

For the record as posters have said it is traditional for bride and groom to sleep apart before the wedding and it's a life lesson that most blokes do fuck all to plan their weddings.

Grow up and get a grip u sound mental.

Babylon1 · 19/07/2012 16:43
TheBigJessie · 19/07/2012 16:44

You know, I've got used to the idea that having the Perfect Day is really important to other people but this is a new hurdle. Having a Perfect Day isn't good enough, if you don't have pictures of it all, afterwards? And it's important enough to ruin your marriage afterwards?

MammaTJ · 19/07/2012 16:44

I get the feeling that is he had helped with the preparation it would have been wrong anyway!!

Bless him for wanting to be traditional and stay away on the night before your wedding.

TBH, YABtotallyU! Bet you won't show him this, though you would have if we had all agreed with you!

civilfawlty · 19/07/2012 16:44

This canNOT be real. Lordy.

MrsBucketxx · 19/07/2012 16:46

come on op admit it this is a wind up.

squeakytoy · 19/07/2012 16:47

We didnt have a photographer at our wedding. Just let the guests take photos.

It is our 10th anniversary this year.

I get the feeling OP will be lucky to make it to her 1st.. but never mind.. she only paid for 10% of it anyway! Grin

I feel sorry for the inlaws.. all of them.