Man screaming at and rough-handling boy on way to school this morn - WIBU to call school?

[cfc]

I was getting the baby up this morning and her window was open. I heard a guy screaming at a young lad, perhaps about 6 yr's old. He was in his face shouting "just apologise to me, all you have to o is say I'm sorry Sam" so it wasn't his dad. Then he grabbed him by the front of his jacket and lifted him up in front of his face and continued shouting in his face - he also was still smoking with the ciggie hanging from his mouth.

At this point out of my window I shouted at him to stop. He just walked on, but I could hear him continuing to shout but couldn't make it out - he had a proper thick scottish accent (we don't live in Scotland).

I've heard this guy shouting before recently only. Should also mention he was walking with others Inc I think the child's mother. And there were people at the bus stop watching this whole thing. Had I been able, ie not getting a child up, and waiting for the toddler to have his morning poo (he thinks he can wipe his own bum, he can't) I'd have done more.

I think I know the school. I bet they're known to ss. Or I could wait until Monday and follow them to school if dh wouldn't mind getting into work late so i could a- mind the child or b- say to the school admin 'look that family there.

Typos - sorry on tablet.

Rubirose exactly, the school are in a better position to judge whether SS need to be involved or what other options might be best.

How do you know his name and also what do you think the school will do anyway. Why do so many presume they would be known to ss. I'm not saying the behaviour was acceptable, bot nothing to do with you really. I know its not very nice as I have witnessed this type of behaviour myself. I would certainly stay clear of playing Miss Marple as you may put yourself at risk from either the mother or the father.

anyway cfc get off here and stop justifying yourself to the nit pickers and call the school.

Ah! The thought was so far from my mind, bearing in mind my dual heritage, that I didn't even think that anyone was thinking that I was being a xenophobe!

Believe me, the accent wasn't mentioned for any other reason only that it was so strong I didn't hear what else he said when he moved away, just heard the telling - and also thought I'd be able to describe him to the school.

"nothing to do with you really"

what a shamefull attitude.

I would certanly call the school and let them know. As someone else said there may well be a catalogue of incidents that the school / ss is noting. I know about CAFs having been involved with managing a pre-school. School and SS were in close communication about a particular family.

It may have been a one off incident, in which case nothing will happen and you won't have hurt anyone. The school might speak to the family though, and they may well be embarrased and ashamed and mend their ways.

However if it's not a one off incident and SS are aware of the family, I would think they would want to be made aware so that the picture can be drawn.

I could not do nothing, I couldn't live with myself. Imagine how you would feel if he was the next of those awful news items and you could have done something.

Make that call. It makes me so .

shouting whilst smoking is possible unless you have a quiet voice

The school is close so i'll walk there on our dog walk this late morning. Also, we're considering it for our littlies so it'll be nice to see it. Thanks for all your replies, very eye opening, thank you.

CFC you don't need to keep justifying yourself.

I have phoned the police before after something very similar and they took it very seriously.

The thing is you have nothing to lose. If the school aren't concerned they will just thank you and leave it. But if they do have concerns, your phonecall may mean action is taken.

The think that struck me is that the woman with them did/said nothing. That really worries me

I know from experience that it's possible to shout and batter a small child with a cigarette hanging out of your mouth, my stepfather had quite a talent in this area.

"it's impossible" FFS! Is that even relevant to this thread?

OP it won't hurt to give the school a call. They may be aware of issues, if not it may make them aware. Either way, I don't think you'll rest until you feel that you've done something. Please don't ignore this poor child.

"but nothing to do with you really"

Makes me wonder why the NSPCC ever ran that "Stop" campaign about child abuse/neglect only stopping if we all get involved and report what we see.

No doubt the same people listen but ignore DV, as well.

To the posters saying "leave SS free to deal with the really bad stuff", who knows what "bad stuff" is actually going on with this kid if that sort of viciousness is normal for the family? If there's nothing more sinister going on, there's no actual harm done by flagging it up, is there?

sorry x posted. Glad you are going down to the school

Thank goodness some sensible people have started posting!

morethan
I would certainly stay clear of playing Miss Marple as you may put yourself at risk from either the mother or the father.

Really ? You honestly would put your own selfish self before the needs of a 6 year old?
I cannot believe the shallow, uncaring, ignorant people on this thread.

cfc thank god there are people like you who are prepared to stand up and take the time to report.
I am a foster carer and it is shocking what goes on in these poor childrens lives.

I'm so sad to read of some of you attesting to the fact that you can shout and smoke with your own experiences. I'm so sorry for you having to go through that.

If nobody ever stood up for the vulnerable what a society we'd be!

If I'm laughed out of the school, I don't care! Evil flourishes when good men do nothing...

People who say it is nothing to do with you are entirely wrong. Child Preotection is, morally and officially (givernement policy) the concern of everyone in the community. This should be reported to SS.

government sorry

So chilling reading some of these posts picking at what the OP saw. Makes me understand better all those horror stories where no one said or did anything until it was too late and the parents who managed to convince ss everything was ok - "well, that report must be a lie - you can't smoke and shout at the same time can you?"

CFC, just as an aside, you may not be able to take the dog into school with you as they aren't usually allowed on school premisis.

Sorry if you have already thought of that but just thought I would mention it.

"If I'm laughed out of the school,"

You won't be.

Schools can refer parents to positive disipline classes, it doesn't have to be SS and no one can justify an adult using violence to make a child behave, there are better ways of doing it. That is how the cycle of bad parenting is stopped.

I'm worried about him now. I hope SS do get involved. Six years old. :(

I don't understand why some people are saying things like 'what difference does his gender/accent/him smoking make. It doesn't make a difference, the OP was just relaying what she saw concerning a little boy being bullied by an adult.

I know for one that my reaction wouldn't have been different if the OP has read "I saw a mother with a plummy english accent grab her son by his jacket and shout (without a cigarette in her mouth) into his face.

premises