Women who pack suitcases for men.

[AnnaMosity]

I hear of this relatively often.
JUST DON'T DO IT.

I did question why his bag was so small, and he kept telling me not to be a nagging wife

everlong, exactly what i thought but oh seemed to think all the nick nacks i brought on hoilday were unnecessary

The thing that pissed me off the most is when he unpacked he was so proud, i thought he lost his luggage but he assured me proudly thats all he would be needing for the duration of the hoilday as his plans included sitting by the pool and checking out the local beer

If dh is going away on his own - he packs. Although if for some reason he was struggling to get it done in time or had to do something I would pack for him - just like he would for me in a similar situation.

If we are going away together, he gets his stuff out but I pack. I'm better at making sure it all fits - and that way MY stuff doesn't get screwed up too.

And like others - DH does all the unpacking and most of the washing on return. :)

Oh god i just asked oh now

If i was in hospital and i needed a packed back what whould you pack

Answer

Were do you keep the over night bags

Says it fucking all really

I HRTFT but first time DH and I went away with kids I had packed our stuff, told him to hurry up and do his, to which he was "huh?!" his mummy and sisters had packed all his life, oh, and unpacked too.

Not anymore! Now he packs his own single pair of unpaired socks! I am not his mum. Thank god.

I am not his mum. Thank god. - Well,exactly, sunshine.

science, I did once go on holiday with no packing at all. I had a "had enough" moment and convinced my boss there was nothing happening in the next week that wouldn't wait :) Bought basic toiletries & some knickers at the airport, sorted the rest out when I got there. They do have shops in Abroad, surprisingly

Not sure I have ever told the story on here but I travel for work (and have done in all my jobs).

Last job, one colleague was a bit jumpy and I couldn't understand why. We had all been out for dinner and gone back to our rooms and I got a call from this bloke. He said 'I couldn't really say this face to face but my wife always packs for me and I always get really concerned for the journey back that I won't be able to get everything back in the suitcase. If I get stuck, would you help me pack?!'

I'm sure you can guess my response

I buy DHs socks and often other stuff if I see something that is a bargain or that would work well for them.

1. ds1 and dh share socks and I would prefer they all match to make it easier to find a pair (I don't sort socks)

2. if I don't buy them the fuckers (DS1,2 and DH) all steal mine. I hate it when they wear my nice white socks and they come back smelly, grey and misshapen.

Nimpy, it isn't a posh one, it is a DIY round above ground one. We live in San Diego and don't have air conditioning (you don't really need it where I live, but it helps to cool off with).

DH gets jobs I hate and he doesn't mind, or that he is good at and I'm not and vice versa. I happen to be good at some things that are traditional 'women's work'. Frankly I think I get the good end of the stick most of the time. He cooks, irons, puts clothes away and earns all the money. I look after the kids, run most of the errands, do most of the grocery shopping (although he is very handy with this too), deal with most of the social stuff, dogs, doctors, school stuff etc. Anything liquid or goopy like paint, plaster, cake icing....He and the kids often clean house while I sew something they want done. I certainly think that I have the good job there.

Neither of us can garden to save our lives. We've killed mint four times.

my wife insists on packing the cases, i'm only allowed to suggest what i might want to wear, apart from that i just have to go look after the kids while she gets on with the very serious business of packing.

actually i'm doing her a diservice there, she isnt such a controll freak, she's just anal where it comes to packing, and loading the dishwasher.

Why not? I am at home all day, my DH is isn't. I'm perfectly capable of knowing what he needs, and I check with him about which clothes he does/doesn't want in advance. He does his toiletries bag last and ther stuff like cameras/chargers etc. If I'm doing mine and the kids then it doesn't hurt to do his too. What's the big deal?

If I need anything technical sorted out on my laptop it's just a given that I will expect him to do it for me. He is quicker and better at that than me. So?

I'm not infantalising him, nor him me. We both acknowledge that the other has more time/skill/knowledge in certain areas and we help each other out where we can.

When I was in hospital after having ds2 I was staying in a few nights and hadn't really packed for it. I needed some more knickers, as you do post birth. Dh came in with 4 pretty silky lacy knickers. What I'd had in mind was the cotton up to your armpit ones but I hadn't said that and he just grabbed pants!

I suppose thats the difference, he has one type of pant for all events, I have a vast collection varying in sizes and uses!

everlong I see we come from the same school of packing.

Perhaps that is the motivation, to leave maximum room for our own items!

I've never packed for a man. Dh is entirely capable of knowing what he wants to take with him. I don't think he would want someone to pack for him.If I did, I am sure he would unpack it to check what I had put in and if it was what he really wanted to take.

Even dd (11) packs her own case these days

For holidays DH needs: canvas shoes, long shorts, chinos, trunks, 4 polo shirts, couple of t shirts, high factor sun cream, 2 long sleeved shirts, 1 sweater (possibly two), 1 jacket (cannot cope with the journey if he doesn't have his breast pocket), tennis kit and shoes, glasses, binoculars, kindle, phone, phone charger, laptop, pens, paper, waterproof, deck shoes.

He packed once for himself. We were going to Greece. He packed two pairs of pants, 6 jerseys and no trunks.

Ooh yes, dressing dd: Usually skirts with awful socks and the wonderful occasion when he took her to Bushey Park and walked her along the river in a fleece top because she didn't say she needed a coat. She was 4!

Dd1 is leaving for a summer in Australia tomorrow. She hasn't packed yet, and I'm not doing it for her!

The problem I have with the "why shouldn't married couples do things for each other" argument is that the doing things for each other often seems one way. There are far more women packing, ironing and card writing for men than vv. This may be OK if the woman is a housewife and sees that as part of her contribution to the household, but if both work then women shouldn't still be doing all this boring organisational stuff as well. Men can be good packers. Blokes in the army don't have their wives and mummies packing for them, if a man is rubbish at it then he needs to learn. You make him do his own packing with you standing over him discussing what he needs and next time he does it himself.
I think some women just like to feel needed and act like packing is a mystical art, same with ironing.

I don't pack for DP - but I will nag him to take more than 2 pairs of shorts for a fortnight. I also end up having to sort out all the "joint" packing - kids stuff, tickets, passports, money etc and at the minute it is driving me insane. The only thing I've asked him to do is find the insurance paperwork - been asking him to do it for weeks (we leave tomorrow) - so he is now noisily hunting through bags of papers (which he just threw in a cupboard weeks ago). God this is stressful!!

I also don't get why it was MrsBoj's job to find extra clothes for her husband when he hadn't packed enough stuff. If my husband forgot to pack items he'd be off down the shops whilst I sat by the pool drinking beer. I really don't understand this desire to mummy grown men. Surely he's capable of buying his own clothes, or is this another job "mummywife" does for him?

It's funny those people i have travelled with who just chuck it all in and 'travel light' always end up using all my stuff.

I went on a large group hol and no one apart from me packed towels, toothpaste or suncream. I would wake up to people i had only met the previous day in my room going thru my drawers looking for 'the' towels, and was constantly asked to pass 'the' suncream. My hair towel was covered in sand and 'the' suncream ran out after 2 days (14 days supply). No one would buy anymore as they could all do without it apparently. So i went and bought more for me. On my return i was greeted with 'great there is more suncream'.

If i said no i was accused of being really mean as it was 'only a bit of suncream'. Yes but shared with 17 people it doesn't go very far and i am getting 3rd degree burns on my crappy english skin.

I'm still very bitter about this - can you tell?!

Why didn't you just say "oi skinflints buy your own towels and suncream and stop bumming off me". I presume you were younger and less confident. Towels and suncream are easy and often cheap things to buy abroad so I wouldn't see forgetting them as a disaster. I'm fussy about my suncream (and having a dry towel) so wouldn't want a load of people using my stuff. They sound like bullies.