To think that my childminder puts her own children before mine?

[BlackholesAndRevelations]

of course I'm not stupid and I know she will do this... It's just that I'm getting fed up with her cutting corners for the sake of her kids, when I'm paying her to do me a service.

I'm thinking of sending them to nursery full time instead, so that i know where they are all the time (instead of on massive long car journeys), and can pick them up whenever i want (instead of waiting for them to return from long journeys)... despite believing that my baby should be with a childminder (he's 9 months at the mo but will be almost 1 when I return to work).

WWYD? (re: nursery or childminder)

So a child minder is supposed to be more of a "governess"? Do they having teaching degrees and suchlike?

My CM does a school run - it's not something I've ever really thought about as a negative. It's life. And really not a big deal. As far as doctors visits go - there's only been one, and she rang to ask if it would be OK, of course it was. She'd been having unexplained pain and I was worried about her - I was glad she was seeing the doctor.

The only thing that would be a deal-breaker for me would be the changing of start/end times to accommodate her children's needs. That would be irritating. I think she's taking the piss a little there but I'd start by saying "no I can't leave work early, sorry" when she tries.

Sorry - the last par referred to the OP's CM not mine! Mine has never done that, not once in 2 years

Geez are childminders considered slaves or something?

OP if you don't like the package of care she's offering your child then change child care provider... simples!

My 2p worth as the mum of a minded child is I was very happy for my CM to "get on with her day" and do everything she normally would, including Drs bank, shops etc. That's what a baby/toddler would do with their own family after all. The school runs are long ish, but if it were my family then yes my DD2 would have been in the car 30mins each way 2x week if I needed to do that school run. Still home by 9.30 and 4.15 . It wouldn't bother me if the CM did it as long as I knew this was "part of the deal".

Benefits of CM vs nursery- difficult for me to comment. The nursery I used 18yrs ago for DD1 wouldn't happen now - it was homely and small - they ate in the owner kitchen and as a treat watched TV with the after schoolies in the owners front room! NurserysI know of now are more "industrial" ....

Huge benefits of CM- we are in a big city but have a local high street. Youngest DD went up that high street and round sainsburies pretty much every day, and you know what- when I took her there would be several old dears/shop ladies who would greet her by name and have a chat- that's priceless (I didn't know thhem from adam!) but when she could tell me, it was always "that Lellys friend" . It was like she was really "raised by a village" .

BTW DD2 is 13 now, "Lelly" CM her till she was 11 after school and now is still a part of our family really- she's coming to the concert DD is in for instance.

DD2 and the other kids were adopted into Lellys family- her big kids loved them, they visited her mother etc etc (OK the visits to Mum were because she had a caring role there too- I didn't mind a bit, DD was safe happy and learning about all sorts from the experience)

I cant see the problem with a cm taking a mindee on a trip to town to go to Boots. I am sure the child loved the train ride and different things to look at.

As to doing the school run, they are just a fact of life with children and if you have a problem with them then use a nusery but one day you will be looking for a cm that does school runs so you better hope that all the places are not full with other peoples pfb's who have stipulated no school runs or you will be buggered.

She doesn't do school runs for mindees as only takes pre-schoolers.

Well what a debate thus has started! If recent posters had bothered to read my replies, I have decided to keep the mix of two providers because I like my cm. So I don't need to be called "pfb"/ told that I'm not "allowing" her to do school runs etc.

Mumsnet is full of people with a lot of pent up energy who need to channel it elsewhere instead of by getting aggressive with posters asking for genuine advice.

Thank you ever so much to those people who allowed me to see the other side and give me a balanced view- which was what I was after!!

op maybe you should concentrate on coming across less judgmental. your posts have a feeling that you think your better than your cm.

if you don't want a mixed bag of responses about a subject that causes debates don't post. its simples really.