To think that my childminder puts her own children before mine?

[BlackholesAndRevelations]

of course I'm not stupid and I know she will do this... It's just that I'm getting fed up with her cutting corners for the sake of her kids, when I'm paying her to do me a service.

I'm thinking of sending them to nursery full time instead, so that i know where they are all the time (instead of on massive long car journeys), and can pick them up whenever i want (instead of waiting for them to return from long journeys)... despite believing that my baby should be with a childminder (he's 9 months at the mo but will be almost 1 when I return to work).

WWYD? (re: nursery or childminder)

I disagree. The parents involved should together say if they think she's driving too much.

£12-15 per hour is pretty good for caring for three children, in my opinion.

As I said, I used a childminder and was really happy with her, but she didn't take the piss like this one seems to be.

Rubirosa Tue 19-Jun-12 19:28:17:

"I think he will start to benefit from the wider range of toys and activities, highly qualified staff, more children etc at that age"

This makes me a bit cross and sad, because good CM's should provide a wide range of toys and activites, be highly qulified (more qualified than most nursery staff who will be dealing with a 2yo - it will be the manager who is as qualified as a good CM) and visits to toddler groups etc should provide more children to play with.

I can see that at three children benefit from nursery school routines (taking register, having snack away from their main carer, etc) all small steps on the route to going to school for 6 hours a day. But at 2? I would be if a CM couldn't provide these things, or a parent didn't recognise this is what the CM provides.

Having said that, I couldn't find a CM I was happy to leave my 2 yo with, and she went to nursery.

you would be hard pushed to earn £12-£15 an hour.

You can only have three children under 5, that includes your own children and most childminders do it because they have children.

Children over 5 are at school most of the day so there is only a few hours each day for them.

You also have to feed these children and give them snacks, buy equipment - it isnt just as easy as saying 'here play with my DC's toys. There is registration fees, constant paperwork, first aid courses, childcare courses.

I can guarantee that hourly rate is not just going in his/her back pocket whilst they laugh all the way to the bank.

The childminder we used briefly charged £18 for 3 children between 7.30-8.35am, petrol would have come out of that so £13 ph, £45 per day for the little one, she had two of those so £90 per day, over a 5 day week that totals up to £28,080 per year because she did expect to be paid for her holidays and mine, hence she priced herself out of the market.
I don't accept that it's not a good living, that was more than I or the other mother was earning at the time for the pleasure of staying home with her preschooler.

She is taking the piss to expect the OP to change the contract in order to accommodate what she wants to do with her own dc and the OP would have every right to refuse.

The CM offers a service and it's up to the parent to accept it or decline. I don't think they can object to her doing the school run for her own dc, not if the cm is offering other activities throughout the day which are geared towards the minded children.

As for whether £12 - 15 is pretty good money for looking after 3 children - I think it rather depends on the children 3 like mine have been this afternoon and she'd want double that!

You also have to feed these children and give them snacks, buy equipment - it isnt just as easy as saying 'here play with my DC's toys. There is registration fees, constant paperwork, first aid courses, childcare courses.

All tax deductible though

Lynette, I'm sure many CMs are very highly qualified, but the standard CM course isn't a qualification on par with a level 3 childcare qualification, it's an introductory course done over a few weeks. That's not to say it isn't completely sufficient to childmind, because it is, and I believe there are currently moves towards requiring CMs to gain a level 3 qualification (personally I do not think this is necessary).

However many toys and resources you can fit in an average small home, it won't be as may as a well-resourced nursery.

I am fortunate that my DS will be going to a very good nursery with highly qualified staff (many with degrees), lovely resources, a huge well-designed garden and good quality food. I do believe that at the age of 2 he will gain more from that setting. His CM is lovely and warm, and does lots of nice outings and fun things with him, and is providing great childcare.

Obviously, you know what is available to you, and what is best for your DC, Rubirosa.

But I don't think there is any excuse for CM's not to become qualified to level 3, or provide a wide range of high quality resources.

Mosman, when I (briefly) did child minding, I charged if the parents went on holiday (on the basis that it was their choice not to be using the service), but I did not charge if I was on holiday (on the grounds that the service was not available for them).

Agreements vary but the key thing is that the parent and CM go through the contract prior to signing and so if terms have been agreed, then neither one has any business moaning or trying to change the terms on an ad hoc basis, to suit themselves. If either party changes their mind, then unless the other is in agreement, it probably is best to give notice.

My thinking of a childmnider although maybe wrong but it is to be involved in a sort of normal family routine in a home enviroment or have i got the wrong end of the stick,
OP if you are really unhappy with it move the baby to either a mnider with no children or a nursery you have to be happy for the service you are paying for

Gosh what a really sad thread and a kick in the teeth for cms.

I have just given up minding after full time working for 3+ years.

How do you expect cm to go to doctors or dentist without mindees?? Ask parents to have their kids for that time and not offer a service?? Wierd!!

I truley put mindees first in my day and that's why I gave up as was sick and tired of putting my own kids last..

Most cms I know do the same..

Op if you are going to use a nursery do understand that your child will be one of many not one of few.

Lynette,.

Most cms have already got qualifications in a previous career, I was a district nurse and my friend cm was a teacher, though of course a level 3 is so important!!!

thebody, you could be a barister and be qualified (but it will do you no damn good when faced with a toddler who is having a tantrum)...obviously a nursing qualification is useful, as is teaching, but unless it is teaching EY, then a level 3 NVQ in EY won't hurt. And really not that difficult for someone who can manage a degree. Just a bit time consuming.

Sorry, just feeling mega argumentative.

if it's 'nice work if you can get it' then why don't you become a CM OP? Then you can be with your children all the time (bu naturally not ever take them to the doctors). You're expecting the impossible.

The point of a cm is a home from home environment, so of course they go to the shops and on the bus etc, for me that was one of the reasons for choosing a cm. I wanted ds to have and do the same things there that he would if he was with me, have a normal family situation. I couldn't be happier with my cm and have no desire to put him in nursery.

Having said that, I would think twice about hour long car school runs every day, that's a long time.

I really don't think a level 3 qualification is that important for a home based childcarer - I wanted a homely, family environment, someone with lots of experience who was sensible, warm and affectionate, and lots of everyday activities. I didn't want a small-scale nursery, I didn't care if the CM followed the EYFS. I think most people who use nannies and CMs probably feel the same (at least they do in my experience).

Which is why you are moving your child to a nursery.

Yes, because they are two different styles of early years care/education, and more suitable for children at different ages/stages imo.

I can understand why you are bothered. If I was paying for me DD to be looked after that is what I want for. I can see nothing great about a toddler being stuck in a car for an hour most days. Obviously as parents we do it occasionally, sometimes daily - but that imo is different. I wouldn't want my DD being dragged round a supermarket for a full shop every week either - a trip to the local shops for some key things - yes, no problem, infact DD did that at nursery too. GP - as a one off fine, regularly - no.

I assume the OP pays the cm what the cm asks for, and a cm has more than one child - so this adds up - so the less than minimum wage thing isn't often the case either.

Round here cm cost was not much different to nurseries.

I think it is find doing some everyday house stuff with a cm - but all the time, or an hour's car ride daily? Not for me. I'm not intolerant - just want different things, that's all.

Let's face it , bet most of us can't do all these things in paid work hours anyway.

I feel a bit guilty now and have calmed down from my emotional wobble. My cm does lovely activities with the kids. I really hate the driving but up until now, have just put up with it on the basis that you take the rough with the smooth! Still planning on going with the mixture of the two options, and seeing how it works out.

Re: becoming a cm, I certainly did consider it when I had just had DD, as I am a teacher and had dreams of running my own mini eyfs unit in my dining room (!) but a- I need more financial security, and I think there are too many cms in my area already, and b- I am not sure if it would really suit my personality... I haven't ruled it out for the future, but as someone else pointed out, could only have three under fives therefore only one mindee at present- not enough money to pay my bills probably! Like I said- haven't ruled it out.

A child minder in my area earns £5 per hour per child. If they have 3 children its £15 per hour. Its not wildly well paid but its not the worse paid. Also many child minders save on heating costs as these are tax deductable.

Surely its reasonable for a child minder to bear the cost of looking after their own child. If they were in a different job then they would be paying £5 per hour per child in childcare.

Personally I prefer a nursery, although I had one really good childminder in the past.

Hulababy- that's EXACTLY what I was thinking (that nobody else can get these things done in a normal working day, and that her job is to look after mine and other people's kids...)

The thing that has always stopped me from just making the move to nursery is that my DD knows the cm well, and likes her, and I'd be devastated if she wasn't happy at nursery. That's why I think the mixture will suit us.

Lynette I also have 4 kids youngest 13. I accept there is bad practise out there in all jobs but to critisise a home based child career for doing home based activities is stupid..

Mindees loved school runs, dentist trips, shopping, picnics in park, farm days, snowy/muddy walks... By all means if op prefers a regimented, cooped up boring nursery day then great..

Sorry argumentative too and ironically doing level 3 in sept to do school work..

Just so sad that people so quick to knock cms when so many do fantastic jobs and have brilliant relationships with mindees and parents..

thebody, I agree.