AIBU to wonder why women move to the passenger seat.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

Twice recently I have seen women, presumably picking up their OH from work, get out of the driver's side door, walk around the vehicle and get in the passenger side. The man then gets in the driver's side and drives away. If I had seen men swapping to the passenger side as well it wouldn't make me wonder. I would assume that whomever likes to drive takes over. I can't think of a single time I have seen a man do this.

In our house, I am the main driver because I love driving and DH isn't fussed. I'm not so bothered about it that I would swap over if he was picking me up from somewhere though. Why bother messing with the mirrors and seat? It irks me because it smacks of the man taking the helm from the little woman now he is on deck IYSWIM.

Yes, I know this is a first world problem and it is none of my business.

I swap because I drive miles for work and DH only drives to the station so I'm happy to take a break from it when I get the chance.

I move sometimes because I can't be arsed to drive anymore not because I'm a woman and he's a man.

It's purely selfish on my part

well I hate driving my DH because he BREATHES TOO DEEPLY whenever I attempt any kind of manoeuvre and it makes me nervous. I am quite competent actually (most of the time) but I figure that if he wants to drive, let him...

The men are probably terrible backseat drivers, my mum never drives my dad anywhere for this reason.
I recently passed my test and I prefer driving alone to driving my DH anywhere, he makes comments to try and 'make me a better driver' but I find it quite irritating as I don't criticize his driving. If this continued I could see a situation where I only ever drive him if he wants to have a drink.

Your suggestion is correct in our house - I have been known to do exactly as you describe. 'D'H is a terrible backseat driver and the rare occasions when I've driven with him next to me have left me shaking for some time afterwards. But he's an arse, so maybe its true of others aswell. :)

Does anyone ever see a man swap though? I never have.

I hate driving dh, he does that deep intake of breath thing when I "almost" hit something .... Which I don't

So I get out and make him drive

I often let DH drive because it's one household chore he's prepared to do, and he does fuck all else.

My dmum and ddad are like this. She is the default passanger. She says its because ddad is a backseat driver but I drive him places and he doesnt comment.

My dh has to sit in the back in our car as he doesnt drive and dds carseat doesnt fit in the back

its got nothing to do with him being a man, if I shared a car with ANYONE male or female I'ld do as little driving as it was fair on the other person to do

my mum doesn't mind driving so 9 times out of 10 if she's not tired I'll go in her car rather than drive her in mine, its exactly the same thing so how does it "smack of the man taking the helm from the little woman now he is on deck "

Besides, when I do this with DH, it is because I don't want to drive, not because HE DOES, he'ld happily be driven, I just don't happily drive!

I swapped with dh yesterday as I had a really bad headache and needed to close my eyes and relax. Sometimes I like driving but most of the time he does it because he says he likes to drive me and dd, fine by me as I do enough driving.

"Does anyone ever see a man swap though? I never have"

yeah! on long journeys I take over from him at service stops and I'll take a (short) turn when he needs a break, but you wouldn't see it as an observer because we usually go in and eat in between

We do the reverse, he picks me up then moves to the passenger seat and I drive home - 'cause I'm a shit driver and he makes me practise. Yes, you have to mess with the mirrors etc. but if you only have one car which you both drive then there's always some messing with the mirrors anyway.

My DH will happily swap. Unless he really wants to get somewhere and I know full well that he is a maniac with lead feet drives faster than I do.

basically I'm a bigger whinger than him when it comes to driving

My husband is the world's worst passenger. With anyone, not just this little lady. Even on a plane he has sharp intakes of breath as he doesn't trust the pilot. His foot about goes through the floor pressing a nonexistent brake.

Also I very rarely drive with an adult passenger. When I do I start doubting my self. I don't know why, I'm much happier driving alone.

Plus my dh never really drives a car, he lumbers about in his big van during the week. I think he quite likes the chance to drive my car.

That enough reasons?

DH is an awful passenger/back seat driver. I find that telling him to shut the fuck up has the desired effect. Letting him drive would just reinforce his crap passengering.

^The men are probably terrible backseat drivers, my mum never drives my dad anywhere for this reason.

This.

Sometimes DH takes over and says "I'll drive" when I pick him up from somewhere and sometimes I drive him. He also drives us everywhere when we're together, when we go on holiday or anything, even though I always offer to share the driving - this is good though as I get to fall asleep. You choose your battles I guess.

It's partly that I used to be a nervous driver when we were first together - I'm not now, very confident and no accidents in nearly 20 years of driving. It's partly that I think he sees the car as something he has a bit of control over. I control practically everything else when I think about it- just the way things have evolved. So if he sees the car as his thing, then it's fine by me - one thing I don't have to worry about!

I move to the passenger's seat because I would rather mutter under my breath about his driving than have him mutter under his breath about mine.

And I hate driving it gets in the way of my nosiness

I don't take that much notice to know if any of my friends DP's have done this, most have and use two cars, tbh.

I do it because ilike to drive as little as possible and i sleep on any journey over an hour.

There are a LOT of passive aggressive passenger men on here. I wonder if there is some psychology involved... I'm not talking about motorway driving BTW, just short journeys.

Yep, my DH is a dreadful backseat driver!

Dh tries to do this if I collect him from somewhere, drives me nuts.
Only if I collect him in his car though, he can't drive mine

If DH is with me he drives.

Firstly habit

I had a car when we first met, he didn't.
He enjoyed the practice at weekends. I enjoyed the rest as I'd general drive 80+ miles to see him.

Secondly he didn't travel long distances by car as a child and I did. Even as an adult he gets faintly car sick as a passenger.
DSIL even more so she always drives.

He's much better at nasty parking spaces than me. Is childhood home had the entrance from hell to reverse up.

And yes DH is a dreadful backstreet driver and it's much more restful to let him get on with it.

I usually drive dp when we're in the car, because it's my car.

You'd assume he was driving though, it's LHD :o