AIBU to wonder why women move to the passenger seat.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

Twice recently I have seen women, presumably picking up their OH from work, get out of the driver's side door, walk around the vehicle and get in the passenger side. The man then gets in the driver's side and drives away. If I had seen men swapping to the passenger side as well it wouldn't make me wonder. I would assume that whomever likes to drive takes over. I can't think of a single time I have seen a man do this.

In our house, I am the main driver because I love driving and DH isn't fussed. I'm not so bothered about it that I would swap over if he was picking me up from somewhere though. Why bother messing with the mirrors and seat? It irks me because it smacks of the man taking the helm from the little woman now he is on deck IYSWIM.

Yes, I know this is a first world problem and it is none of my business.

If its my car I drive. If in his car he drives. I prefer to be a passenger though, I don't mind driving but as a passenger I don't have to concentrate. This is with anyone not just DH.

"There are a LOT of passive aggressive passenger men on here"
not about that for us
he is a pleasant driver or passanger
I am a pleasant passenger, I am a miserable driver!

I usually drive dp when we're in the car, because it's my car. We both regularly correct people's old men's assumptions that he's letting me drive, just because my car happens to be a Classic (no road tax, yay)

You'd assume from the outside that he was driving though, it's LHD :o

I hate driving with every fibre of my being. It's nothing more than a necessary evil for me and I do as little of it as I can get away with.

DH is not a backseat driver. He actually helped teach me to drive and was pretty good at it. His (outer) calm he maintained while I was pulling out in front of double decker buses on busy roundabouts was impressive to say the least.

I sometimes let DP drive my car, as i drive for a job and sometimes can't be bothered driving anymore if i pick him up from work, but i wait in the drivers side, then either get out as he is walking up to the car, or whine "you drive, ive had enough of driving today"

STBFIL was most confused when DP answered the phone when we were nearly at his house one day, and told him off as he thought he was answering the phone while driving, it never occured to him that i was driving, even thou we arrived in my car.

If it doesn't bother me that my husband does most of the driving when we're together, then I don't see why it should bother anyone else.

I get to actually drive the car far more than he does as he goes back and forth on the train all week. Quite happy to "let him" drive when he's there.

On longish journeys, ex used to sigh deeply, inform me that he was tired and wanted a break and ask me to take over for the rest of the journey. So, it meant pulling over onto the hard shoulder and swapping seats just so the lazy, selfish, egotistical little twat could 'stretch his legs'.

I'm the default passenger. Any opportunity for a nap, like.

QOD "I hate driving dh, he does that deep intake of breath thing when I "almost" hit something .... Which I don't

So I get out and make him drive"

Ah now you're obviously more forgiving then me... I'd let him get out and make him walk.

I swap because DP enjoys drivingand i cant be arsedand I can sit and play with my phone/ ring a friend/ play with DD...all much more interesting than driving

I do all the driving in our family...DH failed his test when 17...he's 52 now!

I drive everywhere. All the fucking time. So while I love driving (good job really!), there are occasions when I'm back at that sodding station again that I've had enough of it.

How can anyone enjoy a 20 min drive home from the station

My Dad was like this "i enjoy driving" - no you are a controlling arse who thinks they drive better than anyone else.

Caveat - I don't assume everyones DH's are like this!

It wouldn't cross my mind to swap tbh so yanbu OP even though you didn't ask if you were being

We do the oppostie because DP can't park to save his life

I am usually the passenger on new journeys because I can map-read and he can't (nor can he follow sat nav, it seems). I also like to snooze because I don't often get driven. But mostly I drive because I enjoy it and he likes to be driven. He will pick me up and swap into passenger mode so he can snooze - great company we are for each other!

And we're both great at passive aggressive when the mood takes us, just not about driving.

Same Jareth. Dh has been known to drive us somewhere and then swap with me so I can park.

Usually though I drive as it's my car. If dh doesn't like it tough luck. (I let him drive last Monday though because it was his birthday)

DH likes driving, I'm not bothered either way. He gets car sick, I don't. He is a massive back seat/passenger seat driver and I can't stand it. My insurance record is not what it could be. I like a drink, he's not that bothered. I am much better at inventing preschooler car games than he is. All these are the reasons why I never drive if DH is in the car. I find it works in my favour.

Look at it the other way round - it's not the man 'taking the helm' from the little woman. The passenger seat holds a higher status than the driver's seat - you never see the Queen driving around her chauffer - so obviously we as women, being 'better', should sit there!

Actually I might take to sitting in the back seat wearing pearls and a white silk glove, waving regally out of the window while my manservant DP takes the wheel!

I've often been bemused by this issue too. All my friends who drive happily all week meekly sit in the passenger seat all weekend while the 'head of the family' drives. And they don't all like it that way, they just feel that that's the convention.

I do all the driving in our house, as I like it and DH doesn't. It drives the ILs batshit. It seems to upset their whole world order if the man doesn't take the helm. 15 years in and they're no closer to being at peace with it

What irritates me equally is that if there's a group in the car then the women will always sit in the back seat and men in the front, like it's an unspoken rule. Are the backseats unworthy of male arses.

My DH won't let me move over when I pick him up because he says he doesn't want people thinking that he is the sort of person who won't let the little woman drive.
Sometimes I make him drive though especially if I've been driving at work all day.

yabu
they are lucky,
dh can't drive due to sodding epilepsy, so I do all the driving, would love ot hand over to him.

DH is the one driving when we are together, mainly because I don't like driving if I can help it. I do realise it is a "traditional" set-up and very gender stereotyping, but frankly it doesn't bother me.
I'm not going to change a set-up that works for both of us, just for the sake of not looking like a gender stereotype.