to find excuses to walk past the builders working down the road because i'm secretly flattered by them whistling at me?

[mumofbumblebea]

and they are not even good looking?
I have self-esteem issues, don't I?

Gah. "show off to their mates about" and even that doesn't make sense.

TalHotBlond because, by the majority opinion on mumsnet,i am completely unreasonable :) it's obviously a bit of a marmite issue, i have to admit the thread hasn't ended up as light hearted as what i expected.

Ah the only time I enjoyed being wolf whistled at was when I was 8 months pregnant.

You couldn't tell from the back which is when they whistled so I took great delight in turning round to faces.
Ha! That'll teach 'em.

Pouchemuchka :o

yanbu
I stopped doing this When I realise they were whistling at the younger persone behind me

My DH is a bricklayer mumof. He swears he doesn't shout at women in the street, or drink tea or go around with his arse hanging out of his trousers but I know he's lying. I could send him round if it'd help?

Pouchemuchka*

TalHotBlond that would all depend on the quality of the arse :o

i have to admit the thread hasn't ended up as light hearted as what i expected.

If you look at thethread you will see that a large no.of people took it lightly and then a small flock of MN harpies descended at the end with many a carping post to each other - gives a false impression of real sentiment.

That's unfair, whatmeworry. The OP is pretty gracious actually, accepts that there are differing views. Subjects like this are polarising - like OP said - marmite. We all have our own backgrounds and experiences that we use as a filter and sometimes a 'light-hearted' topic can have serious undertones, for some of us anyway.

I object to your use of 'MN harpies', it's misplaced and unfair.

MN harpies - yes. For having the intelligence to recognise that when these groups of oiks wolfwhistle at women they are not offering a flattering compliment, they are saying, 'look, a lower form of creature I equate to a walking blow up doll'

Never been more fucking proud to be a fucking harpy.

I also think that's incredibly unfair and woefully misunderstanding, whatmeworry, of a lot of women who've explained they don't consider it complimentary because of intimidating situations they and others have been put in.

mumofbumblebea I have a lot of respect for how you've responded to the thread.

I also don't think it makes any difference if the perpetrators are good looking or not - saying it's ok if the man in question happens to be hot gives him just as much licence to take the harrassment further

I totally agree with Hownoobrooncoo and others. I'm stunned that some people on here think this kind of behaviour from men is ok, and to learn that some women find this flattering. Bizarre.

I have to admit I'm feeling my age lately and the fact I get whistled at or 'tooted' by young men in cars only makes me smile for a nano second.

Because I know as soon as they pass me, they realise that at 43 I'm a lot older than they bloody thought!

Still, it's good to see them squirm if they get stuck at the lights...they don't know where to look Lol.

I object to your use of 'MN harpies', it's misplaced and unfair.

I rather like it actually, describes these small groups who flock onto a thread after its been going a while and carp and carp away (to each other) for page after page and everyone else usually just buggers off.

People aren't "harpies" just because they have opinions and disagree with you.

Actually, if you read the thread, people objected at the beginning. Did you read it? Can you read?

Oh am I harpy? I thought I just made a contribution and fairly early in this thread too.

Well it would make me smile.

Not sure i would find excuses to walk past but YANBU for the fact that you feel flattered.

I used to get it a lot, and it always irritated me. I remember once walking home from work and I got the whole "beep of horn and WAHEEEEY!!!!!" out of a van window, only for the van to drive past and my friend's face to drop and go all embarrassed as he realised he knew me >_<

I don't like the fact that some men feel they have the God given right to do certain things. What drives me mad even more is when I've been out clubbing before and I've had men literally grab me as I've walked past...I've slapped someone in the face for that before. Not something I'd usually do, but it scared me!

Harpies is that the best you can do?

People aren't "harpies" just because they have opinions and disagree with you.

Disagreement is one thing, but "I don't like it and therefore neither should anyone else" (cue catsbumface PA emoticon fest) is being a harpy.

Sorted.

"Disagreement is one thing, but "I don't like it and therefore neither should anyone else" (cue catsbumface PA emoticon fest) is being a harpy."

Trouble is though, if you "like" harrassment of any kind, then if you encourage it, you're inflicting it on a lot of people who don't appreciate it. It affects other people, which is different from something which is merely a personal preference that doesn't affect anyone else.

What about the "smile love it'll never 'appen" comments that when you ignore them are followed up with "snotty cow" or similar?

I agree with those saying that it can, or used to, start early and I was about 11 when the whistled or yelling from cars started.

I don't like being whistled at
a) because I am inherently clumsy so will probably go arse over tit
b) because I have no interest in anyone except DH finding me attractive.

I am 34 and have 2 under 3's though so the thought of anyone finding me attractive at the moment is remote

Is this all an excuse for stealth-boasting from those who manage attract the notice of builders?

It's a win-win; you get to condemn their behaviour whilst letting us all know it actually happens to you.