to be enraged and disgusted by my (ex) friend's behaviour? And what should I do?

[OAM2009]

She blanked me. Again. In the gymnastics changing room in front of a mutual friend. And all our children. I said "Oh, hello" without thinking when I saw her, only for her to utterly ignore me.

Long story short - said stupid thing to friend ( if she (your child) had done that to me, I'd have slapped her! ) I know, too much, was only meant as a figure of speech, wasn't really planning to physically attack her child! Didn't realise she was very upset and offended (yes, again) so didn't apologise until some days later. She accepted my apology and has not spoken to or acknowledged me since.

This is the woman who took in DS1 at 2.30am, fed him breakfast and phoned the in-laws while I was in hospital having DS2. We've been friends since she moved in to our cul-de-sac 3+ years ago. And now we aren't. Small village, shared vehicle access, same playgroup, same library, same gymnastics. As I said, we were good friends.

Please can you tell me if one or both of us is BU? And which one? And what can I do? I DO NOT want to be the kind of person who can't even muster up basic civility but equally I don't want to continually be humiliated by this woman.

I hope we continue to see you under the same name

moved on somewhat Llareggub

And the OP could be the manipulative one here pushing all the right buttons. She's still getting all the attention and sympathy, while the friend is continuing to be demonised. All win, win to the OP. I have no idea what's going on here and who is in the right but I won't just swallow everything I'm fed by a stranger on the internet. I's like Jeremy Kyle where he invites everyone to jeer at the idiot on the stage without really knowing what the full facts are and they willingly oblige.

Whatever has happened OP, why are you letting someone badger you into a public apology on here? I wouldn't want to Be friends with someone who thought they could tell me what to do. Certainly not a list of instructions either.

Also, we don't know you, or your friend. So what does a virtual apology actually mean? Sweet FA to be honest. If this is genuine, I really don't see the point

It's a forum, Hownoo. The OP is, well, the OP. Of course she's the one gettng the sympathy.

It is, in fact, a public forum. The other lady knows how to access it and could (might?!) post herself. If she wants her side put across, then all's fair.

Hownoobrooncoo have you read the last 2 threads?

How very extraordinary??

how utterly bizarre!

i have read the other thread, thanks to whoever linked it, so she gave advice re feeding children and basically said your children would end up with an eating disorder, nice

you commented on something her child did and said had she been your child you would have slapped her, NOT the best of coments but obviously said tongue in cheek/jest, i get that your friend was upset by that but to ignore you so publically and infront of the children is just rude and pathetic and then to make you post an apology and that SHE will decide if you are ever friends again, jesus who does she think she is?!

this is a public forum you are using a pseudonim, you dont id her or her children, if she wants to say something she can come on and post herself, utterly utterly childish and i think you are better off without her as a friend!

(anyone else hoping the other woman will enter stage left now?)

@ Loopy

Festi - what last two threads? I have read this one though. I'm just very cynical about what I read on the Internet. As for the apology, the OP could have worded it in a way that closed this and did the job, but has actually done it in a way that totally contradicts what the apology was intended to do and has played to the the Mn audience and still managed to get sympathy and more outrage at her her friend. Yes, I'm suspicious about the tone of the apololgy, seems manipulating to me and not necessarily from the friend. Do folk believe everything they read hear?

Are you the friend hownoo?

Who knows...

here is one the other is linked somewhere on this thread is is not directly relevent to this Op but is relevent in giving some isight into op has been feeling, will scroll through and look for it.

Curiouser and curiouser...

Hownow enters left stage.

at Hownow

She's behind you!

Loopy im reading your posts with a faux drunken toft accent why is that?

I don't know - but then I don't know what that is!

it was curiouses first post that had the faux drunken toft accent actually.

do you know why I believe the OPs apology, because it reads like it has been dictated to her.

The friend is nasty, small village, blanking.

Friend wants to be queen bee, its things like this, this bitchy, school girl, nastiness, that lead to depression and people ending up moving themselves and their family, the "friend" needs to grow up and start acting like a grown woman.

Hownoo deftly catches thrown tomatoes in her big gob as she's rather partial to them and went without dinner tonight and says... thank you!

I haven't read all the thread, but I was just wondering to myself if your comment was the straw that broke the camel's back, when I saw your next post saying that you often put your foot in it. Is it possible that you have annoyed her in the past and this was one step too far, or that she was looking for a reason to fall out.

I struggle a bit with very outspoken people and I know someone who can be regularly quite offensive. I bite my tongue, but worry one day she may push me too far. I also know someone who often has a dig at one of my children and was recently quite negative (for no adequate reason). For me, that was the final straw and I have given her quite a wide berth since. Could this be happening to you do you think?

I don't know if you are the friend. I wouldn't want to be the friend. The friend is a cunt. I wish we all lived in that village with the OP so we could blank the friend. But who knows if you are that friend?

Or the friend could actually be quite a nice lady and is now being called a cunt and demonised on Mn on the say so of one person. Baaaaa!

I had wondered if maybe the friend was on MN and that's why she kept blanking the OP.

We only have one side of the story. The friend's side might change our opinions. Who knows.