to tell an elderly gent to f*ck off

[Helenfellows33]

i was on a family day out on a steam train and on the way home an infirm old man got on with his carer. she left shortly after and he was on his own in his wheelchair with me and my dh and dc's. this journey was about an hour long and ds being cranky started to cry. and the old man turned to him and shouted at him to be quiet boy. at this i told him to shut the fuck up and a list of words i cant mention here. dh backed me up although i was telling a friend later she said he was ok too this as he was old, we are now not speaking cause of this. AIBU for doing that to an elderly person.

Why would you ever speak to an elderly person like that, no matter what they have said? You have just confirmed their stereotypical view that the young of today have no manners of standards. So cheers, from the rest of us. Good job.

Oh you're just dripping with class aren't you, OP?

I think a simple 'I'm sorry, I'm afraid he's upset, please don't make a difficult situation worse by shouting' probably would have sufficed, without resorting to base-level vulgarity.

Aside from the example it sets to your DCs, it is not appropriate to speak to anyone like that, let alone a vulnerable man. Yes he was wrong to shout at your child, but sometimes elderly people can forget the way children can behave, and indeed the stresses of parenting.

Take heed of what everyone here has said and perhaps you will enjoy a life less fraught with aggression!

TubbyDuffs

If I was within earshot of your outburst, I would have been complaining to the guard about you.

I would also complain.

No i dont think his carer should have left him however, You overracted and made yourself look an idiot infront of a whole train , this man just shouted he wasnt going to attack your child , learn to handle yourself better you sound hysterical . and good on your friend

Is this a joke thread? No one could be this stupid, surely...

there was no where else to move to. yes probably shouldnt have swore. but he was very agressive to a two year old child who was being comforted by his father. No one else mentioned the crying infact another lady also commented saying how rude he was. Children will cry and be noisy from time to time and if he had an issue he should go on the adults only journeys which the have in the week. plus ds wasnt the only one crying and least two other children where at different times.in the carraige but ds was the only one who got the abuse.

Oh maybe a wind up treadwariliy I hope not because what a waste of ours and the posters time if it is ,

YABU.

You sound AWFUL. YOU are the reason I am too intimidated to say anything to parents if for example your child was kicking the back of my seat on public transport.

Wow rude on both side, yes i hate it when Older people think they know best but surely you could have said something along the lines of, "please could you not speak to my son like that, he is just restless" rather the Fuck off!

I'm sorry but manners go along way, will you berate your son when he tells you to fuck off in the near future?

I think lots of you are being unnecessarily harsh on the OP. She shouldn't have sworn but I am amazed that very few of you are saying that the elderly man was in the wrong too.

I wonder if the replies would be any different if someone posted on here that they had shouted at another person's child on a train and told them to be quiet. No doubt they would be told on here to mind their own beeswax and that you shouldn't shout at other people's children. Maybe the OP was stressed. Maybe her DS is just a baby/young toddler and when he cries he cries and there is nothing she can do about it.

Your friend is doing the right thing, although you'll probably make her life a misery now, I wouldn't speak to you again either if I was her.

Seriously though, do you still think you behaved appropriately?

OMG. I haven't time to read the whole thread, but I totally agree with those who are saying you set a poor example to your kids. I'd like to think this didn't happen, but sadly I wouldn't be surprised. :(

You thoroughly deserve this flaming. Disgraceful behaviour on your part, even if he did tell your child to be quiet.

Had the carer known what sort of people she left the poor old man with, she might not left him on his own!

A demented person is fine to sit on his own in a wheelchair, the biggest danger is them wandering off!

It is not like he could just walk away from unpleasant people, or unpleasant situations, like most of us can!

He may have been rude, impolite, maybe even possibly classifiable as aggressive. But in your OP, you say he said, "Be quiet, boy!". I can easily believe that. Old men, of a certain age, suffering painful health conditions, perhaps missing their own grandchildren, can be easily annoyed by other people's young children.

But how can you refer to taht, as abuse, without cringing in shame, at what you said?

OF course the old man was in the wrong and so was his carer for leaving him but there is ways of handling situations and telling anybody to fuck off and Other expletives that the poster wont post . Isnt the way to handle yourself no matter how stressed you are , Its hysterical behaviour imo ,

Is the OP Kerry Katona?

You lost the moral high ground the minute you opened your mouth and told an old man to shut the fuck up!

You keep justifying it. Which is a shame, because next time, and next time, anybody say something to your kids, you will blow off, swear and shout abuse, and this way teaching them the same.

You ruined an old mans outing.

He could have been from a care home. Maybe it was his birthday. Maybe it was the only time the carer should take him.

I think you need to give advance notices any time you and your family go on outings, so that people can avoid.

Put an advert in the paper:

"We are a really foul-mouthed family of 4, we intend to go to Butlins on the 24th of July, if you cannot handle shouting and swearing and being verbally abused, may we kindly suggest you choose another time."

Or in language more appropriate for your family.

There is never any justification for telling someone to "fuck off" in public, in front of your children, and to a stranger.

It shows you to be a rough common gobshite, and what a delightful example you are to your children.

Helen Stop ignoring the point to suit yourself.

YES the older gentleman was rude, we agree.

NO you SHOULD NOT have told him off the way you did. You've had many more reasonable suggestions on how to handle this.

This must be a windup thread... Or an outing of Jeremy Kyle guests....

You do realise it is actually an offence to be abusive to strangers, don't you? I wish the transport police had been on the train and read you the riot act.