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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For punching the next person who calls me 'too posh to push' in the face

176 replies

beckyboow88 · 27/02/2012 16:43

Both my DCs were born my sections, first emergency, second elective. I've gone through all sorts of emotions about them from feeling that I'm not a real woman to where I am now that is actually quite happy my bits are intact still. But if one more person tells me I'm too posh to push I may just hurt them. AIBU?

OP posts:
hackmum · 27/02/2012 16:44

YANBU.

CailinDana · 27/02/2012 16:44

YANBU.

belgo · 27/02/2012 16:45

Have they really said that to you? I thought it was a phrase that only existed on the daily mail website.

MidnightinMoscow · 27/02/2012 16:45

YANBU.

Tell em to toss off.

LAlady · 27/02/2012 16:47

I have had the same as you - emergency and elective. I think it's been said once or twice in a jokey way to me. Equally I've jokingly suggested they should try it - it's not the sweet light and roses they suggest and actually major abdominal surgery. They soon shut up.

bobbledunk · 27/02/2012 16:48

YANBU, cs are wonderful sexsavers as well as lifesavers. Punch themGrin

OhChristFENTON · 27/02/2012 16:49

Really, do people really say this to your face? YANBU to be annoyed.

YABU to think that your 'bits' would not be 'intact' had you had vaginal births Wink

StrandedBear · 27/02/2012 16:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
beckyboow88 · 27/02/2012 16:50

They have actually said this, it happened once before whilst I was deeply in PND then I saw it on OBEM last week and then someone else said it to me again last night, I very calmly pointed out that the comment could cause all sorts of problems and asked them never to say it to anyone again. But the more I think about it the more pissed off I am!!

OP posts:
OhChristFENTON · 27/02/2012 16:50

Really Stranded, why would you say that? You sound very young .

cherrytopping · 27/02/2012 16:51

Give me their address and I will go around and give them a full scale lecture on why too posh to push does not exist, complete with sources.

I am being 100% serious btw.

Original poster
beckyboow88 · 27/02/2012 16:52

I definitely do not qualify to be posh!!

OP posts:
NeldaAufwader · 27/02/2012 16:52

Yep, unfortunately there's always the comedian who will come out with this. I used to smile and nod, if I'd have told them the actual reason why I needed a section they'd have shut up (major tears with first birth lots of ongoing problems after). Hmmm maybe I should have.
YANBU it's one of the joys of pregnancy isn't it? People making comments on your choices they wouldnt dream of making in other areas of your life.

GreyTS · 27/02/2012 16:53

You know so many people have said this to me, never realised how bloody rude and inappropriate people could be until I had DC's! Same as you one emergency followed by elective, I just say "Too right!" I'm just pleased I have 2 healthy happy children, DD1 would have died without the option of a CS.

MidnightinMoscow · 27/02/2012 16:54

Read the OP Stranded, she had an EMCS and then an elective.

OriginalJamie · 27/02/2012 16:55

Yes. Nut the bastards

nickelhasababy · 27/02/2012 16:56

yanbu.

1: it's none of their business

2: you were obviously traumatized by your first birth, so no wonder you don't want to leave anything up to chance!

3: it's none of anyone else's business.

StrandedBear · 27/02/2012 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StateofConfusion · 27/02/2012 16:57

Yanbu.

I've had it said a lot too op, ds wouldn't be here without the cs and I wouldn't be if dd hadn't been cs.

People are ignorant --and jealous of our perfect vagines--

helloclitty · 27/02/2012 16:57

I was definitely too posh to push, well not posh but chicken.
No one has ever said it to me but then I normally say it first Grin

YANBU to be a bit annoyed though.

MidnightinMoscow · 27/02/2012 17:01

Fair do's stranded. Smile

OP I understand your pain. I had an EMCS with DS, and anytime someone asked me about it I felt compelled to explain, "Oh, but I got to 9cm and was pushing for an hour".

I am pg again, and at the moment am hoping for a VBAC. Truthfully, part of my decision is based on a need to give it ago again.

Sorry to hear you have experienced such negative people.

CarpeJugulum · 27/02/2012 17:02

I've had people as me that question as I was considered an "elective" CS due to gestational diabetes and by the scan measurements it was estimated that DS could be potentially 14lbs. I'm not much over 5ft, and the words of the consultant were "you can deliver naturally, but there is a risk that we'd have to dislocate his shoulder or break his collar bone to deliver him assuming he doesn't get stuck."

He then said I could have a week to consider the options - I looked at DH and he nodded; and we booked the section then and there.

Still never came up with a good response though! Hmm

cherrytopping · 27/02/2012 17:03

No one need give 'an excuse' that they were too chicken or that they got so far.

Its the other persons ignorant twattery that needs to be pointed out. Not you justifying yourself.

LilacWaltz · 27/02/2012 17:04

What happens to people's bits then to leave them jealous? Confused

Original poster
beckyboow88 · 27/02/2012 17:06

I was very traumatised first time round. Second time I didn't want to risk being so traumatised again if that makes sense? So even if I did opt out of a VBAC, poshness had nothing to do with it but midnight I know what you mean, I always feel like I'm justifying myself.

OP posts: