to think most men want a skinny woman

[theuglymate]

I go out with my friend occasionally and I can't think of a time when she doesn't have a crowd of men around her. We are similar age, height, I am no oil painting but not completely hideous either. The main difference is that she is a size 10 and I am a size 14. I always feel like that fat ugly mate and it is soul destroying.

I'm not ugly but i'm not pretty and slightly attractive. Fat or slim i do not think it will make much difference to my facial attractiveness. It is true, i like myself, not happy with small nose bump though. I have perfect teeth, big eyes :)

Yes I think most guys do like a slim woman with full breasts and curved hips. Although there are exceptions.

Hmm tricky.

I think in public men go for slim women who are "conventionally" attractive and someone who their friends will be impressed by.

In private we all have our own preferences and some are really not picky!

size 10 is not skinny is it? Some people might be skinny at size 10 but mostly not I'd think?

you probably mean healthily slim - I wouldn't find a fat man attractive, I'd assume he wasn't very physically active or energetic but I wouldn't find skinniness a great turn on either

I think most men prefer slim women, not skinny.

I agree that a fun loving, friendly personality is very attractive but I am talking about for example, dancing in a club and my friend having men gathering around her and me dancing around on my own.

A 14 is about average isn't it? You're being way too hard on yourself!

I expect it's similar to how women find men attractive. To a degree it's more confidence and personality that matters. But I have to say I wouldn't find a seriously overweight man sexually attractive regardless of his confidence.

Perhaps this is because people are attracted to people like themselves. I probably wouldn't pursue an olympic runner because we'd never be at the same fitness level and therefore our interests probably wouldn't cross much. E.g. if we went hiking he'd always be waiting for me etc.

Interesting topic to think about though.

Yes, sorry don't get side tracked by me saying skinny. I just meant that she was slimmer than me, I certainly don't think I am huge but I would be happier without the wobbly belly and the double chin.

I think most men do prefer slim women and I was just about to make the same point ithaka just made.
I just lost a ton of weight and went from being a snug size 16 to a 10 and the difference in attention from men is amazing. It isn't because of lack of confidence before I lost the weight because I felt really good then , in fact I didn't realise how big I was. I think it is that the majority of guys prefer women who are size 8 to 12. That is why films and adverts worldwide are full of such women.

I think if you are a 14 wearing a size 10 outfit with rolls of flab clinging then that's probably not a good look. A 14 in an outfit that flatters and fits then I doubt most men would have a clue what size you are actually.

When I think of my friends who seem to attract tonnes of men, they're all different sizes, certainly not all stick thin. What unites them is:

-confident dress sense - they don't all have the same dress sense, but they look very stylish in their own way

-subtly or obviously flirtatious, generally quite tactile

-confident and chatty when we're out, even if they're not actually that selfconfident when you get to know them better.

I fail on the first and second point - I don't care enough about clothes and am terrible at flirting. Oh well.

I think men in general prefer slim women. Slim, not necessarily skinny. That said my friend who is a size 4 gets a lot of attention but she is very attractive anyway and would be even if she was bigger.

I was briefly a size 6 and think I looked better then and did get more attention. Alas I now lack the willpower to starve diet myself back to that size and I'm not sure my hips will ever go back to being that skinny after having DS.

Most men will like the woman they like regardless of her size once they get to know her.

But for first attraction I suspct YANB entirely U. Size 14 (unless you are short) is not fat and Size 10 (unless your friend is tall) is not skinny so I would have thought men would not discriminate between the two of you on weight.

But a size 8 versus a size 22+ - I think most men would feel more attraction to the size 8.

It's about extremes I suppose. Size 6 is big on me and I never attract male attention. Part of that is confidence etc but, objectively, know I am too thin to be physically apealing.

I don't see the problem with admitting that a person can also be too fat to be physcall appealing.

I think some shallow men with low self esteem want to show off to their mates by pulling a bird who fits society's standard of beauty. It's not about the girl, it's all about how she makes him look.

Think of it as a way of weeding out some of the knobbers.

But what does size 14 mean? I am size 12 and 5 feet 10. I have had people of 5 feet 2 tell me that anything above a size 10 obese.

And every time I have ever known this subject to come up all the men present have admitted they prefer women with curves to skinny, though any woman who is comfortable with herself can be incredibly sexy, regardless of size.

a 14 in H&M is not a 14 in DP's so I think size is irrelevant. Looking healthy and comfortable is always going to be more sexually appealing than fat and uncomfortable looking. I have a friend who is a size 16 who swims/zumbas/walks and she undoubtedly looks better than me and my rather unfit size 12 frame which lounges on the couch and walks the dog for 20 mins a day.

And I suspect most women prefer men who are sort of average sized. Not super skinny and not huge.

I am a size 10 and I am slim, def not skinny, am only 5'3 so it's about the right size for me.

When I go out with friends I usually attract one or two men, but not as much as my friend (size 12-14) who is far more bubbly and flirty than me. But all of us usually get some kind of male attention because we're generally a fun group. We are all kinds of sizes, some of us are stick thin, some are 16+.

Probably most men (statistically) prefer size 8-12 but from what I see, there are enough out there who prefer other sizes, for women of different sizes to still have a chance of attracting someone out there.

Do you think men are able to pick up on how a woman actually feels about themselves?

I have met a few that seem to be able to suss out that I am quite wary and have my own little invisible barrier around me. Unfortunately, most of them use it as an opportunity to put me down a bit further.

I think men prefer slim women; not skinny, not fat, slim. They're not wrong for that preference, beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.

Definitely, OP... some women have 'it', which is sex appeal, confidence, happiness in their own skin, and others unfortunately don't. It's completely discernible.

By October 22nd i hope to be about 13 stones. I'm 5'9. i think i willget into a size 16 as im tall. I am scared of attracting men as i want to stay single and i recall a polite no thanks not always working. I'll still be overweight then.

men like curves. some like big bums and thighs, some dont. some like big boobs some dont. but most dont like boyish figures imo

Get a cattleprod, GoingForGoalWeight, that works. Congrats on your weight loss!