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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have changed DD's wet nappy in a corner of a cafe because they had no babychanging facilities?

235 replies

onwardsnupwards · 16/02/2012 21:07

Please tell me I was being unreasonable, because then I'd be less angry. No facilities in the loo, not even a plastic baby mat to put on the floor. There are no other places locally to change nappies and she was a little sore in the morning. I should have just left when they said they had no facilities, but I was with my Dad and sister and we don't get together as a family that often. So I sat down to order lunch, but I just couldn't face eating, thinking DD might be uncomfortable, so in the corner of the half empty cafe, well out of sight and nose range of other customers, I spread my coat on the carpet and laid DD on it. Just as I'd got clean nappy on DD, the usually over-friendly assistant came over and did a strop: "You can't do that here, this is a restaurant and people are eating". It was just a bit of wee; no one could see; she was on my coat; and it was a fucking caff, not a restaurant. I calmly finished changing her, put my coat back on and stalked out, with my Dad pleading with me to stay and eat. Was I compromising food hygiene? Would a female assistant have reacted in the same way, d'you think? Will I EVER, EVER, EVER visit that caff again? I guess it propelled me back to the dark days of trying to find somewhere breastfeeding friendly, and all those months of being housebound because Northampton is so backward in this regard. Is it even reasonable for a "restaurant" NOT to have baby-changing facilities, when legally they have to provide toilets for the rest of us? Should parents of pre-school children just be banished to the ends of the earth until their children become old enough to spend a penny?

OP posts:
semtexinmypocket · 18/02/2012 23:05

Dayshift, the child is two. The child could have STOOD on the toilet floor.

DayShiftDoris · 18/02/2012 23:42

Thought it was a baby?

Were the toilets minging?

Sorry alongside poor spelling I didnt read pages 3 to 7...

I spotted Northampton and felt sorry for OP... the facilities are shocking round here

aurynne · 19/02/2012 04:13

How about your car? It would have been my first option, I would think. Or sitting/standing on the toilet seat with a mat or a coat between the seat and the baby (the "baby" is two, by the way)...

KateSpade · 19/02/2012 08:12

Dayshift Dorris

The toilets in Manchester Train Station are the same, i don't know if you've ever been, but they've been shut down and replaced with a port-a-loo because of drug use.

When babies are little, i think its fine. Personally i wouldn't have done it in public when my baby is two.

and aurynne stop being a twunt...

bobbledunk · 19/02/2012 11:03

You're whining because they didn't provide you with a changing mat, most people have their own changing mats for this type of thing. Your child, your responsibility. What you did was disgusting. Amazing how most people in this world seem to get along without engaging in this type of behaviour, I've thankfully never come across anybody filthy and anti social enough to change their baby in an eating establishment.

People who are too stupid and lazy to properly deal with these situations should not be allowed to breed.

Vile.

KateSpade · 19/02/2012 11:12

I think the last part is a bit harsh bobbledunk
I don't think it was appropriate at all to do it in a cafe especially when the baby is two, but i did it when my daughter was 8 weeks old, the cafe only had one other person in it, and we were sat in a corner and no-one could have seen anyway.
When you have a baby things don't always go to plan however if it was a poo nappy, i think i would have found it very very inappropriate, nobody wants to see anyone else's shit.

bobbledunk · 19/02/2012 11:34

It's always inconsiderate whether people can see you or not. I have a baby and would not dream of inflicting her nappy changes on other people. There is no excuse to be unhygienic and disgusting, especially in areas where people eat.

Most of the problems in this world are caused by anti social idiots and their appalling parenting, we are not harsh enough.

ladymariner · 19/02/2012 20:43

OP, yabvu

And I want to know what happened to your poor Dad, what a shambolic end to what was supposed to be a pleasant family meal. Did he and your sis have to follow you as you flounced out or did they at least get to finish their lunch, albeit in a very embarrassing atmosphere.......

tralalala · 19/02/2012 20:50

surely just change a nappy on your knee in the toilet. (not on the floor that is disgusting)

KateSpade · 19/02/2012 21:57

FWIW i was at a wedding today, and their were no baby changing facilities, my DD needed changing and next to the toilets their was a room with a bench in it, i snuck into their, shut the door, give it a quick clean with Anti-back wipes, put my matt down and changed DD. Anti-backed again, shoved the nappy in the bin in the ladies. Done.

I would never, ever have dreamed of doing it at the table i was sat at, it wasn't hard at all.

& whilst i was doing it, i was thinking about this thread Hmm

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