to be pissed at DSis reason for not attending our wedding?

[dontcallmedeliah]

(I know it is a wedding one ? so prepared to be called out on this but?.)

Me and DP are getting married after I have given birth to DC1. So getting married in March.
DP is an Icelander and so we are getting married in Iceland.

My family (Parents, siblings and their families are flying out to come to the wedding)

Flights all booked and paid for by my parents as a wedding present to us (for all of my family) - should point out that my dad works for the airline and got discount/deals with our flights

DSis2 phoned me up yesterday and asked what weather is probably going to be like when we are there.
Told her that the average temperature was around 2C in the day. She asked about the length of daylight. Told it would be about 11hrs a day.

Anyway she said she would phone me back.

When she did, she said her husband had been on the Internet and had discovered that it can be very very windy at that time, with lots of snow etc.

Well yes it is March and very far north.

She says that she and BIL think that it would be too cold for their DS who is 5. Has he isn?t use to such temperatures or snow (they live in the channel islands)

Well I was shocked ? told her to bring very warm things and they keep homes and hotels and other warm. And are more than use to the weather and how to deal with it.

Told her (in the way you could probably only say to a sibling) that Icelanders have dealt with the cold for thousands of years and they are fine and that we are bringing our newborn with us and DP has 3 DN who are all under 6 who are perfectly fine in weather.

She basically ignored all that and said that she and BIL have reached their decision and are not going to change their mind ? the 3 of them are not going.
I asked about the flight ? she said that she would just talk to Dad about them.

AIBU to think that is a stupid reason for not coming to your sisters wedding and to be mighty pissed at her?

OP is your sister quite spoiled?

Your parents paying for the fares, etc. She doesn't go because she doesn't fancy it. SO backing out after everyone had arranged everything on her behalf (well most of the major details) would be no big deal. I'm interested in her track record in this regard.

Does her DH have a job where it would be a big problem if he coudln't get back to work on time? Like if there were a monumental snow?

It all sounds too bizarre for words. But I believe you when you say it's probably not mostly a cost issue (am guessing her DH works in financial services or some such there).

Some parents are much more cautious than others. It is a great shame for you but your Dsis is the one who will miss out. If it were me I would be thrilled at the chance for my 5 year old to see Iceland. Perhaps others are right and there is something else going on. Hope you have a fab wedding!

Both of you are being unreasonable. She should work out aq way to come, maybe without the sprog, but at the same time she's said she can't come so that's that, don't stress about it. Like previous posters have said, maybe there's another reason as to why she can't/wont come, and maybe she's too embarassed to say. On the other hand 2*C is really cold and coulc potentially be not very good for a young child who's not used to it.- I've lived in Scandinavia, and what we think of as winter clothes simply don't cut it up there, it's a plausable concern.

I think you should talk to her, mano a mano, and tell her how you feel without getting angry. Maybe you two can work something out.

Oh FFS.

Right. Key facts from OP's posts:

1. DSis not short of money (so that's not the reason)
2. Dsis told parents before they booked tickets that they'd "love to come, definitely coming"
3. Dsis (and all OP's family) have all been offered free accommodation, which Dsis turned down. So yes, they'll have to pay for accommodation, their own decision, but even so - see Point (1)
4. Dsis flies all the time, so it's not fear of flying
5. Dsis has come up with the most ridiculous excuse ever (it's well know that Iceland and Greenland have contradictory names as Iceland is really green, and Greenland is really icy ).

Can't believe there are still people saying OP is being U.

Weddings are often not a big deal to those not actually getting married themselves, which I think is completely fair enough.