In thinking that if you won't go out alone at night because you've got a vagina, you are actually a bit pathetic?

[solidgoldbrass]

Because, statistically, if you have a vagina, you are far more at risk of being murdered if you stay at home If your home has a man in it. Yet time and time again there's this 'Waa, waa, I need an armed escort or a male owner to protect me if I'm ever going to set a foot out of doors after dark. It's so unreasonable to expect me to use public transport or walk anywhere...'

From a feminist's point of view SGB is right, women are pathetic?

NorthernLurker isn't trying to support or justify SGB's cack-handed way of making her point; she is trying to clarify the point and make it in a far better way.

Can anyone see the point that ^NorthernLurker* is trying to make?

No-one would support the right of anyone to call another woman pathetic.

That's not a yes or no answer

And this

AIBU In thinking that if you won't go out alone at night because you've got a vagina, you are actually a bit pathetic?

That's the offensive question posed by the OP.

Oh gotcha Jamie sorry

I see the point northern lurked is making but then it is lost by it's ending

"SGB is absolutely right on this issue. If you don't like reading that well that says more about where you're at than it does about her stance."

As has been pointed out, statistics like this prove nothing. There are definitely people who are at more risk out alone than they are at home.

Personally, rather than belittling people for making their own risk assessments based on their personal circumstances as opposed to general statistics covering umpteen women from umpteen different areas, I trust their choice.

i agree MJ

what really stood out in the sgb post was calling other women pathetic,and then later on telling us how she does this and that a form of underhand bullying, putting other women down that is not what is about

Ok well firstly I only speak for myself not any other feminist.
MJ - I have answered your question. It's not as black and white as yes and no. I see the point SGB was articulating. I agree with her that 'outside dark' is not as dangerous as 'inside light'. I wouldn't describe somebody who was frightened to go out as pathetic no, but nor would I be cheering them on in that viewpoint. I think it's based on mistaken assumptions and does nothing to keep women safe. I am concerned by the vitriol she has attracted for making that point. Her point is supported by decades of feminist discourse and by statistics both modern and historical. And yet she is being lambasted for pointing out that the home is the most dangerous place for women and that point is being missed by society at large. I absolutely stand by the end of my post. If you don't like reading this then you really need to ask yourself why that is.

It is unsurprising, and sadly predictable that the only people agreeing with the OP are the more vocal feminists.

Women are rendered afraid of what isn't actually dangerous and that fear keeps them in the home - where abundant danger empirically lies. SGB is absolutely right on this issue. If you don't like reading that well that says more about where you're at than it does about her stance.

Reading the feminists's posts they would have you think that every woman in this country is being beaten by her male partner, when that absolutely is not true.

Statistics are a load of bollocks really, sorry but they are. They can be so easily manipulated to suit the agenda.

I wonder if SGB reported all the muggings, and times she was followed? I wonder how many victims of crime report it. I know of quite a few who havent, both domestic violence, and non-domestic.

And what Soup said.

I am at far greater risk of being attacked outside my home than I am whilst in it.

Why are you trying to make NorthernLurker responsible for the OP MJ? She has stated her position very eloquently. She doesn't actually have to answer yes or no because you demand it.

As much as I'm sure he would like to, my dh is not going to murder me. I may not get murdered when I step out into the darkness but I'm not really willing to take the chance.
Anyway, if I was to be murdered I'd rather my dh did it in the comfort of my own home than pounced on by some lunatic stranger on the dark streets.
YABU, women try to keep themselves safe - nothing wrong with that.

I suggest northernlurker that you scroll down and take a look at my post before my self report kicks in - I absolutely and totally agree with the point you are trying to make.

We are in living hell.

Nonetheless there are ways to say thing and this not the way to do it.

Don't quote stats and meaningless feminist bullshit at me to let me know how unsafe women and children are in their own homes.

at VSM wanting to be murdered (if necessary) in the comfort of her own home.

Thank you for bringing some humour to this thread.

I agree with NorthernLurker, Proles and SGM, calling women pathetic is not a feminist stand but the reasoning behind the main thrust of the OP is correct.

14.09 post

I've read your post MJ, before I posted this evening. What I'm saying, what SGB was saying, is not meaningless feminist bullshit. It's about real women and real lives and things have to change and I'm sure you have cause to know that better than most of the women of this board. I hope things improve for your family soon.

It's meaningless because like everytime a so called feminist fucks up on these boards you all rally around her - what's wrong with an intelligent and well thought out post - like yours, but that ended - sgb - I agree wig the point you are trying to make but not the use of the word pathetic.

That way someone may actually listen to your post

You did say it better Northern. And when people routinely name-call it sort of chafes a bit.

And you know something - it amazes me that you actually read that post and didn't bother to acknowledge it - you want something that speaks volumes - that does to me.

Call it misplaced anger - it probably is - but just once I'd love to see one feminist on this site actually call to task another for the way they word things instead of trying to soften their posts and explain for them.

I'm going now before i really explode.

People like me - we are the statistics you routinely bandy about.

I agree with the point being made - but the way it is made is extremely an truly offensive.

Oh shame on you, SGB for blaming women for perfectly reasonably being afraid of male violence.

And shame on those of you who have used SGB's oafishness in this case, to attack feminists and use this thread to gleefully go in for your usual pathetic anti-feminist crap.

How come you're not saying that this sort of thing is what gives morris-dancers a bad name? If a christian, or a communist, or a darwinist, posted rubbish like this, would it be because they were a christian, or a communist, or a darwinist? No it wouldn't, it would be because they were a tactless person.

But don't let that stop your stream of anti feminist shit, will you.