In thinking that if you won't go out alone at night because you've got a vagina, you are actually a bit pathetic?

[solidgoldbrass]

Because, statistically, if you have a vagina, you are far more at risk of being murdered if you stay at home If your home has a man in it. Yet time and time again there's this 'Waa, waa, I need an armed escort or a male owner to protect me if I'm ever going to set a foot out of doors after dark. It's so unreasonable to expect me to use public transport or walk anywhere...'

I used to go all over the place on my own at night and not give a fig.
i still walk alone at night but not as much as i used to, and i am concerned about what may happen to me because i am now a mother and if i did get killed it would leave my DD without a mum.

yanbu at all. I cycle home at night not even late (about 10) but it is dark and pretty isolated. I don't love it but I also know that statistically I am far more likely to be hit by a car cycling to work at 8am because there is more traffic but I still do that every day.

It's all about balancing percived risk with the reality of the situation. My DS asked me recently when reading a book about different cultures why the boy who lived in the rainforest bathed in the river when he knew there were crocodiles in it that have been known to kill people. I pointed out that perhaps the brazilian boy would look at our lives and wonder why we crossed the road each morning to go to school when there are cars on it that have been known to kill people. It made him think about it in a different way.

Sometimes you just have to live your life - you could be cautious and afraid all the time but be killed in your home falling down the stairs. I agree that some women seem so pathetic these days and it gives us all a bad name. I have been asked if my husband minds me cycling home in the dark on my own

zest - one person's pathetic woman is another person's sensible one and another person's once-bitten one and another person's etc

It is very subjective.

And very rude to speak thus.

Love thy fellow/sister woman. Don't call her names.

chibi I do see what you're saying.

I can't live feeling fear all the time though.I've had to narrow it down a bit.Down a lonely country lane there's not a lot of hope of rescue in the dark.I know its not been the case for many but I just have to hold on to that glimmer of faith in other human beings in general that in the daylight I have some hope of help,should I need it.

Pops in - I don't think society normalises violence against women, I think it normalises violence full stop.

And I love the poster campaign idea.

Erm the stats are like that BECAUSE women go out together!!

If all women started going out on their own you would see some completely different statistics!

"Her OP was offensive and so far removed from the articulate and reasoned responses that have been posted in her defense that it didnt IMO deserve defending."

I would agree that it was indefensible not least because of the upset it caused. That doesn't mean that the discussion isn't one worth having, and that means getting past the 'what a bitch!' sentiments, and actually talking about the issues. That doesn't mean we are SGB's 'fwends' as I was so memorably called by spanishholiday (I assume she imploded btw).

Y VIVA ESPANA

OrmIrian

I agree the discussion is worth having, but I think it was never going to be easy to get past the outrage the OP provoked...not the best start for a reasoned debate.