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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who is stupid enough to send cash by post ?

161 replies

shaketheshame · 17/12/2011 14:35

My mil is. She sent 60 pounds by post and my dh lost it. He put it in his wallet and he must have lost it to the shop.

So I'm pissed off with Mil for sending £60 by post when she could have made a transfer and I'm pissed off with dh for losing it.

Now my shopping day is cancelled, the 60 pounds were a contribution to our ds's xmas gifts.

AIBU ?

OP posts:
OldLadyKnowsSantaClaus · 17/12/2011 14:36

Your dh was stupid enough to lose it. What's with the MIL-blaming?

Riddzy · 17/12/2011 14:36

It is daft to send money via post but it's hardly your MIL's fault that your DH lost it.

YANBU to be pissed off with your DH though.

Sparklingbaubles · 17/12/2011 14:37

It's not MIL's fault is it? It would have been different if it was lost in the post so it's not a good idea. But it got to you. Confused

Original poster
shaketheshame · 17/12/2011 14:37

She was stupid to send it by post and he is also stupid. I'm just angry.

OP posts:
LRDtheFeministDragon · 17/12/2011 14:37

How old is she?

My gran would have done this when she was getting a bit forgetful.

In any case it is a bit daft to blame her when it was actually your DH who lost it!

It could be she doesn't know how to do a transfer - another time would she let you show her how or talk her through it, or could she send a cheque?

OldLadyKnowsSantaClaus · 17/12/2011 14:38

The money got to you. Be pissed off with your dh by all means, he's the stupid fucker who lost it.

Or wasted it down the bookies?

FourEyesGood · 17/12/2011 14:38

If she'd put the cash directly into his hands he'd still have lost it (to the shop - ?). The fact that you MIL posted it has nothing to do with it.

YABU to be annoyed with your MIL (damn that evil woman for sending a generous contribution to your child's Christmas gift!).

QueenOfFlamingEverything · 17/12/2011 14:39

well that's hardly mil's fault Hmm

and how on earth did he lose the money if it was in his wallet anyway? or did he lose the wallet?

DaisySteiner · 17/12/2011 14:39

YABincrediblyU.

I can't believe you're blaming your MIL when your dh lost it!! He's not a child FFS. What if she'd handed it over in person?! Would it still be her fault somehow.

QueenOfFlamingEverything · 17/12/2011 14:40

oh.... did he spend/gamble it? is that what you mean by 'lose'?

lborolass · 17/12/2011 14:40

But she could have handed it to him and he still would have lost it. There's only one person at fault here and I'd be furious at an adult who couldnt look after money which is obviously very important to your family.

Trills · 17/12/2011 14:41

She sent it by post and it arrived and your DH had it.

So nothing she did went wrong at all.

Why are you mad at her?

Trills · 17/12/2011 14:41

YABU

StNicksNackered · 17/12/2011 14:42

DH's aunt sent a signed blank cheque to us, luckily for her it got here!

Original poster
shaketheshame · 17/12/2011 14:42

She is only 60, we never have cash in the house...if it was sitting in the bank, it wouldn't have happened. I know IABU, but it just so frustrating, I have been careful with money and now 60 pounds is gone..I easily blame her because I don't like her.

OP posts:
Sparklingbaubles · 17/12/2011 14:42

Hands up who feels a bit sorry for the MIL?

SaraBellumHertz · 17/12/2011 14:43

What on earth has your H losing the money got to do with your mil sending it by post Confused

Original poster
shaketheshame · 17/12/2011 14:43

He got it this morning and went to our local shop to get some milk so not the bookies, and he is not like that. This money is contribution towards ds's xmas but the money is all spent now.

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 17/12/2011 14:44

You have a really, really shocking and entitled attitude.

Your MIL has kindly sent you money, even though you don't like her. Your dick of a husband has lost it. You are blaming her for sending it?

You really are an idiot.

Original poster
shaketheshame · 17/12/2011 14:44

It is just so frustratinnnnngggg !

OP posts:
lambethlil · 17/12/2011 14:44

Forget about the post bit- it could have been lost, but it wasn't. This is as if she'd done the bank transfer and your husband had then lost it.

You're (understandably) cross, but this really has nothing to do with your MIL.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 17/12/2011 14:44

Yes, it's fairly clear you don't like her.

But that's not getting you anywhere.

She isn't to blame here. And she obviously likes her son and GC - you might like her a little for being generous.

FWIW, my mum is 59 and has only just worked out how to do a bank transfer - she'd rather write a cheque. There are lots of options that your MIL could use .. if she ever feels like giving you anything again, which she may not.

Trills · 17/12/2011 14:44

Be frustrated at the person who lost the money then you idiot!

OldLadyKnowsSantaClaus · 17/12/2011 14:45

FFS, sometimes you really can't win.

Sparklingbaubles · 17/12/2011 14:45

When you say 'lost it to the shop' do you mean he has spent it? So he has something to shoe for it? Confused