To not go for a poo when DH is in the house?

[BupcakesandCunting]

We've been together for ten years and I've only ever done a cack when he has been present once and that was only because I had norovirus and explosive shits.

My friends think I'm insane. I think that I am keeping some mystique alive in our relationship. My poo is pretty potent. He'd never want sex with me again if he smelt it.

I really need to go now. He is poncing about. I wish he'd hurry up and go out so that I can make a deposit. :(

Oh smarty, I have a patent method for using public loos without touching anything.

When I was a student I lived in a house with four other people
The loo was a separate one from the bathroom so no running a bath excuses
Even worse it was right outside the kitchen where people congregated to eat , chat etc instead of in the lounge

I just couldn't poo in that toilet

Every morning I ate breakfast at 8am and walked to uni, poo'ed at 8.30 in uni loo and came home again

I told them I was jogging

For a whole nine months I did that

My brain is officially boggling

OMG!

yummy- your dp doesnt let you poo in the house? what kind of dickensian relationship are you in?

Oh gawd I was having a wee in the toilets at the airport the other day. Now American toilet cubicles aren't as private as ours - there are large gaps between the door and where it locks and the dividing walls are much higher up so you can practically see the person in the next cublices entire legs. So there I was and I could SEE this woman's pants round her ankles and hear her straining...

Oh god MY EYES!

How I love thee England.

cjbarlett - I think we may have stayed in the same flat! I also used the uni loos and also went to visit my boyfriend a lot (only a round trip of 150 miles) and then dropped out of uni

I think the problem here is the amount of time you've got away with it. After 10 years of him not smelling it it problem feels like a much bigger deal.

I've always had poo issues and most long term boyfriends have not known I've even pooed.

You need something to break the ice. I used to get the trots often. At one place that I worked they would send me down to the train station to get imodium or, if quiet and I was feeling brave/desperate, a shit. The problem with this was then most of my work mates knew I needed to poo. I just couldn't bear the thought of someone walking in when I was doing a stinky shite.

One time I was with an ex at a safari park. Having held my poo in all day as he never knew of me pooing I suddenly desperately needed to go. I was crying and begging him to stop and let me out the car and we were in the fucking lion enclosure! I would have rather been savaged by lions then shit myself in front of him.

I'm a lot better nowadays. I just tell DP to not go for a while after me. Which is stupid as his imagination of my shit smell is probably worse than the actual smell.

And I thought I was being delicate not sitting on the loo when DH is right there giving the DSs their bath.

well, not often, anyway

Bupcakes, it is Time. Sit on the loo right now and let yourself goooo. He will still love you in the morning.

omg i totally get this!
i am similar, but not quite as bad as you, i prefer to go when he is out, but if he is in, i won't go if he is upstairs

tis all about preserving the mystique.....

I've always had poo issues and most long term boyfriends have not known I've even pooed

Of course they know, no one is exempt from pooing!

What a situation some people are in with their bowel movements, you poor souls!

Well you know what I mean! There was never any evidence. I think I'm quite a sane rational person normally. I wonder how poo ishoos start.

i dont fart in front of dh either

When I was little my brother used to tease me saying I'd left massive floaters in the toilet (after someone did). I was really shy and this used to embarrass me so much - I bet that's it! The rat bastard.

I used to be like this. And then I got over it. Our relationship is exactly the same.

"My husband won't let me fart in front of him or poo....he doesn't want to know that I poo!"

I don't understand this, it's really sad.

When I was pregnant I couldn't stop farting! If I had gone somewhere else to do it I wouldn't have seen DH at all! And he wouldn't have liked that

I think it's such a shame that having a poo is such an issue for some posters.

I love a good poo. I feel cleansed and, even better, lighter

Come on everyone, embrace the POO!

Since I have become menopausal - I have become very windy .

Appreciate the sentiment, Bea, but poo is definitely not on my List of Things to Embrace.

www.amazon.co.uk/How-Poo-Work-Mats-Enzo/dp/1853757403/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1322309106&sr=8-1

www.amazon.co.uk/How-Poo-Holiday-Mats-Enzo/dp/1853758116/ref=pd_sim_b_1

Any use to anyone?

bottle we really noticed the big gap/less privacy in America when we were there - quite a shocker when there is a big queue!

This is a sad little thread.

It's almost Victorian, this idea that the little lady doesn't poo or fart or have pubic hair. Women lay like logs during sex too as orgasms were unladylike.

As for " letting", that just sends a shiver, to be honest.

If you cannot poo with your DH in the same house, you have a problem.
God help you both if one of you becomes ill and needs help going to the loo or worse. I'm serious. You need to sort it. It's not a healthy relationship if you are so hung up.

DH is usually nearby chatting to me whilst I deposit, asking if it's a nice one

Ewww, that made me a bit sick in my mouth, definitely no mystique left there

I don't understand that someone would rather go to a public toilet where you have no idea who has been before you and lots of people can hear as opposed to their own clean and hygenic toilet

*"My husband won't let me fart in front of him or poo....he doesn't want to know that I poo!"

I don't understand this, it's really sad.*

I agree. How does his not letting you manifest itself?