To not want to be addressed as Mrs, and not Ms?

[MitziKinsky]

One of my DCs teachers always addresses me in writing as Ms. Kinsky.

I have the same surname as my DC, I wear a wedding ring, and often draghave DH with me, so I expect to be addressed as Mrs Kinsky, or even Mitzi (I am on first name terms with all the other staff at this school).

I find using Ms when you know someone is married a bit rude. I'm contemplating pointing out, nicely, that I'm a Mrs.

no discrimination from colleagues, I hasten to add

I can't abide being called Mrs Peachy- in fact my name on a forum my Dh also uses is 'do not call me Mrs Peachy'.

what is wrong with Claire? I just like being called that, no silly formalities. I understand professionals have to all me whatever they have been told my name is but teachers I have known for 9 years and similar- not so much.

I found similar when I was an auxiliary nurse, cory - my male colleagues, same job, were forever being addressed as 'doctor' by the lovely old ladies we were looking after, and the poor female doctor was always 'nurse' when she came on her rounds. I'm going to go by Dr if when I get my PhD for that exact reason.

In most cultures they've come around to a woman being more than just her husband's property. It's rude to assume just because a woman is married that she has given up everything. If you say you prefer to be called mrs and she still calls you ms then she is being rude

I'm in the "would prefer no title at all were used" camp - but will answer to anything except Mrs "Dh's surname" (have great fun when cold callers ring up asking for Mrs Dh's surname and I say there is no such person and by the way, we are on the TPS click ).

So, my preference is "First Name Prettybird" (no title) but will not object to Mr Prettybird (especially as my first name, combined with my surname, can easily be assume to be a German male), Miss Prettybird, Mrs Prettybird or Ms Prettybird. In the majority of cases, whether I am male or female is irrelevant and my marital status is definitely irrelevant.

I have chosen to use Ms Prettybird since I was 17 and went to Uni, so over 30 years ago.

The school know that I married, even though I have not taken dh's name (which ds uses) - but that has absolutely no bearing on how they treat me. What is of more relevance is how I interact with and contribute to the school. Whether dh and I are married or not is of no relevance to ds' schooling. What might have some bearing (but it would be my responsibility to alert the school) would be if dh and I were having problems and/or in the process of separating and/or living separately, 'cos it might have an impact on ds' behaviour at school.

Ds' school gets around this minefield by sending home all communications addressed to "Dear Parent/Carer", as there are quite a few "looked after" kids at his school.

The OP is BU if she is complaining about the fact that in the first instance, the school uses a general honorific, but she is not BU if she has told them that she would prefer to be known as Mrs. It is plain courtesy - but a hell of a lot of extra work for what is probably an over-stretched clerical assistant - so not something I think it is worth getting het up about. The quality of the schooling is what matters.

(I do also wear a ring even though I didn't take dh's name)

The Scots Parliament refers to everyone as Firstname Lastname - at least among their own members. Fine in a formal setting.

I personally prefer Mrs, as I am a Mrs

A fairly senior colleague I work with has her auto signature " Mrs a Neill". I have to be honest and I think it makes her seem less credible/ professional, despite being very capable. I don't think she needs to use any title as her marital status is irrelevent.

YABU, OP. This is the 21st century. (I wonder whether you also regret women having the right to vote and to be awarded proper university degrees?!)

If a woman referred to herself as Mrs or expressed a desire to be called Mrs, I would respect her wishes. I have no time for the notion that Mrs should be the DEFAULT title for any woman, married or unmarried.

What it probably is, OP, is that the teacher thinks you look like a big dykey old lezzer, and so she assumes you would want to be called Ms. It won't be that she thinks that maybe there are lots of women who are obviously married who still prefer not to be designated and defined as such. She thinks you're a big lez, or divorced, or a bit of a bra burning feminist.

at elaine

Another .

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