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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My grandad is offended by my sons willy.

108 replies

VajazzleMyFoof · 02/11/2011 14:13

I am potty training my son at the moment. He has just turned two. I put him pants on but he likes to take them off as he 'likes to get air to his bum bum' his words not mine.

Well Grandad is 76 and comes to visit as it is on his way to get his pension. So my son is running around with his top over his head. My partner is a Stoke fan and has taught him first.
Grandad gets offended and asks if i could cover him up as he does not want to see his genitals. I explain he is potty training and likes to hop on and off his potty as he pleases. He then mutters under his breath, makes his excuses and leaves.

Am i been unreasonable to let my two year old have no pants on, in his own home.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 02/11/2011 14:14

Your not being unreasonable but there again neither is he to feel slightly uncomfy with it, it's probably a generational thing!

Andrewofgg · 02/11/2011 14:15

Disagree with Sirzy. YANBU but he is.

bumpybecky · 02/11/2011 14:15

YANBU to have your ds pants free at home, but I can understand your Grandad not feeling comfortable with it. Hopefully he'll get the hang of it pretty quick and be back in pants soon!

Original poster
VajazzleMyFoof · 02/11/2011 14:16

I agree. When i change his nappy and Grandad is visiting i feel like i have to go in a different room as it would feel uncomfortable to change it in front of him.

OP posts:
SardineQueen · 02/11/2011 14:19

Hmm, well, in an ideal world he wouldn't mind.

But lots of people do mind this sort off thing so I don't really know who is BU.

My mum is scandalised that I don't put vests on mine, if she came round and they were running about without their knickers on she'd take a very dim view, a very dim view indeed. That's how she is though.

So I don't really know who is being U TBH, no-one probably.

Ooopsadaisy · 02/11/2011 14:19

What could possibly be offensive about a two-year old's willy? Especially when it your own grandchild's?

Sorry - sounds very odd to me. It takes all sorts I guess.

Original poster
VajazzleMyFoof · 02/11/2011 14:21

I know. He is very old fashioned. Maybe in his day he never let his little ones run around like that.

OP posts:
EdithWeston · 02/11/2011 14:21

He's not offended by the willy, but is uncomfortable with the nudism.

YANBU to apply the "my roof, my rules" principle here, and it seems the consequence is that grandpa leaves early (which I think is a pity). It'll probably be a short-lived thing, unless you let it become blown out of proportion and become a major issue in family relations.

Remembering how many minor leaks there were with mine at this stage, you may find you decide on pants soon anyhow. And at some stage you will need to advance the potty training to include dealing with clothes effectively. So I hope this will all prove to be a very brief storm in a teacup.

grovel · 02/11/2011 14:22

YABU to be married to a Stoke fan.

EdithWeston · 02/11/2011 14:24

Grin at grovel!

Original poster
VajazzleMyFoof · 02/11/2011 14:24

I do put him pants on but he likes to take them off and run around getting air to his bum bum.

and yes grovel i am been very unreasonable been married to a Stoke fan, especially as they have played so rubbish lately so DP has been a moody bugger.

OP posts:
KurriKurri · 02/11/2011 14:25

If your Grandad is offended by this, for God's sake don't tell him your MN user name Grin

Ooopsadaisy · 02/11/2011 14:25

I'd be interested on how he managed to toilet train his own children without seeing any nudity.

Whatmeworry · 02/11/2011 14:29

Generational thing, and maybe wistful Remembrance of Times Past.

YABU to say bum bum unless he has 4 buttocks :o

pigletmania · 02/11/2011 14:34

A lot of elderly people are like that, and do nit feel comfortable with nudity. It's a generational thing, my dear dad used to be the same, as is my mum.

MenopausalHaze · 02/11/2011 14:35

Could someone kindly explain what being a Stoke fan has got to do with this? Or anything for that matter - but especially this.

Please and thank you.

Hardgoing · 02/11/2011 14:35

How hot is it in your house? Mine would be more likely to get frostbite than a nice airing.

Original poster
VajazzleMyFoof · 02/11/2011 14:36

I dont say bum bum, thats what my son calls it. His bum bum.

OP posts:
LittleMissFlustered · 02/11/2011 14:36

Your lad sounds like mine. He got the hang of pants eventually. Ride the storm, and if you turn the heating down a notch I am sure it will be a very short stormWink

Original poster
VajazzleMyFoof · 02/11/2011 14:38

Ooh its nice and cosy in my house. The heating comes on as soon as we get up.

Maybe i should leave it off and hope he puts his pants on. Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
VajazzleMyFoof · 02/11/2011 14:39

I think its just a bit of football rivalry Menopausal.

OP posts:
TheScaryJessie · 02/11/2011 14:40

Is "generational thing" code for: he's an old man who never did anything with his own children, or something?

wheredidiputit · 02/11/2011 14:44

He just uncomfortable with your son not wearing his pants.

It could be worse he could be at my house in which case, he would get 'look at my wiggle waggle' shouted at the top of my ds also 2 voice.

Original poster
VajazzleMyFoof · 02/11/2011 14:44

My son is a tinker though. The asda delivery man got a view of his willy as did the Postwoman this morning. They both laughed it off when i apoligised.

My son likes to run to the door to see who it is, so a lot of people have seen his willy.

Maybe next time the Jehovah Witnesses come il let him open the door. Grin

OP posts:
Ooopsadaisy · 02/11/2011 14:47

How can anyone have raised any children without nudity?

Babies are not born in clothes. They have to be changed and bathed.

I don't even think of an undressed child who is too young to dress themselves as "nude".

Nude is for self-aware, capable to dressing themselves people who are conscious of the concept and chose it. So a child of 4 or 5 might be nude, but how can it be offensive even then - especially if the child is your own family?

I still don't see any nudity as "offensive" at any age. Inappropriate perhaps or even a case of "er .... no dear ..... that's not a good look, even after 16 pints".