to feel snubbed by lack of invitation?

[IveGotTightsOlderThanYouLove]

It's a good friend's hen do in a couple of weeks' time. It'll cost me around £200 to attend (a LOT of money for me!).

Out of the twelve or so people invited to the hen, two of us aren't invited to the wedding reception. On the email list to organise the hen, they're all discussing what they're wearing for the wedding (I think only I and the other woman know that we're not invited).

Over the past year or so I've helped my friend and her fiancee out a few times when they've been stuck and seem to be a bit of a first-port-of-call for them. We've known each other for about five years.

For the reception, they've hired a hall and a DJ, so numbers aren't overly-restricted.

So am I being over-sensitive, or is this a snub?

Thanks Scarah! I mustn't be upset. It's daft. I don't even know any of them (apart from the bride, of course). There are plenty of people worth being friends and I'm going to try really hard to be good to them. It's times like this that you appreciate your real mates, isn't it?!

notlettingthefearshow, I don't think that's what she was thinking. The activity isn't my sort of thing at all, whereas I do like a party and she knows that! I think it was thoughtless of her and I was just there to boost the numbers. I suspect there's a minimum number of people required for this activity.

What Sarah said. Do Not Engage. They have shown their colours.

Just been able to catch up with the whole thread and can revise my response!

What a nightmare and so sorry you've been stressing over this, OP. You've done the right thing and I hope you manage to keep your distance from these nasty people in future.

At a guess, I bet it's something that has a fixed cost for the group regardless of number and the organiser was trying to make the OP cough up so she didn't have to ask everyone else for more money than she'd originally quoted. If so, life's tough isn't it...

Well done OP.

Just read the whole thread and I am so impressed with you tights!
Well done you for showing up the horrid bride and her horrid chief hen. You sound lovely btw for giving them the benefit of the doubt until they were absolutely proved heartless and grabbing.
you deserve this!

yee haw! you did it, well done you!

They are a gaggle a witches those hen organizer/bride and any others who were trying to SCREW YOU OUT OF MONEY. Shame on them!

Are you going to spill the beans on the activity now Tights? Seeing as you are totally recognisable to anyone from the wedding. Might as well tell us now. [hgrin]

Thanks all. I am in fact getting comfy with a at the moment!

(Just need to stop nervously checking my phone in the hope that my friend - the other hen invited/wedding not invited person - has text and I can make it up to her!)

yes scarah you are quite right, tights needs to spill now, nothing to lose!

Well done Op

Has your friend (the one that also hasn't been invited to the wedding) replied to your text yet about the deposit scam?

Also now can you tell us what the activity is ? Pretty please

Scarah, I'm too scared to! Just in case it's recognisable. Other people attending the hen don't know the situation. I hope!

When the chips are down, you know who your REAL friends are!

Damn x factor, sorry didn't refresh before posting so ignore my last post as my questions have been answered

so glad you stood up to them. and so glad you're not paying the ho the money.

i can't believe they had the balls to be so bloody awful.

yes well, if any of the RL people on here were to ID you, then they should be at the whole situation and wondering who would try and screw someone out of money?

still, you are a bit of MN legend now!

Phewf! OP I started reading this thread just now and have been gripped! I have to say I was all ready to say it MUST have been a mistake but I guess her response shows otherwise. How horrible for you.

Well done!

Honey, they will know, even if they don't know yet. But you don't need people like that, and you don't need to care what they think. Anyone worth valuing in your life knows what you are like, and will recognise these witches for what they are.

I'm not surprised that you have been upset by all this. Is your DH aware of what has been going on? I hope that he is giving you lots of hugs and and

If you're never going to see this woman again, or the organiser, or indeed any of her friends/relations/tennis partners/tennis partners' pet tortoises, I would be verrrry tempted to send a final email, to the whole group, with a lovely link to this thread in it.
[hshock] [hgrin]

lborolass, the HO and bride probably want tights there because without her the cost could be more for everybody else (the invitees). It's likely that they've fed her this bullshit about the deposit to stop her bailing, and then to cover the increase for everyone else.

jennypenney I like the way you think. [hgrin]

GHAHSTLY MN legend! I've only been on here for a few days and feel very honoured that you've all given me such great, practical advice and I really, really appreciate the support. I orginally found Mumsnet via a link about vasectomies, which answered my (or DH's) question - and it's turned out to be genuinely life-changing! :)

Now to convince DH about that vasectomy!

Great idea jennypenney, then they can see how someone with decency (the OP) conducts themselves, and how many random strangers detest them.The bride clearly doesn't have many genuine friends if she's having to rope in randoms to make up the numbers for her hen weekend.

Yes, I should do that jennypenney!

Oh good.

In that case, Up Yours Bridezilla & Co.