To be hugely pissed of with my radical feminist friend.

[NambaJam]

She was at my house this morning and felt it her place to lecture me that because I am married I am in servitude. (WTF!) And another lecture that allowing my husband to have PIV sex with me was tanatamount to him sexualy assaulting me on a regular basis.

Now I can utterly accept her not wanting to have PIV sex. But who the fuck is she to tell me I damn well shouldnt? She then banged on that it was abusive due to the risk of unwanted pregnancy. (DH has had the snip, so no risk) I happen to like being penetrated and will happily penetrate myself for enjoyment.
Sex for me is a very varied thing and involves many things.

I know that some feminists have strong views on marriage, but again its my life and MY choice. And I certainly dont live in any kind of bloody servitude.

Actually this is the kind of thing my 'radical feminist' mother would say She gave me a lecture on the evils of anal sex when I was 15. And having children I don't think she really understands feminism tbh.

Serious questions to the people who understand the theoretical feminism side: Is the point that we shouldn't assume that there has to be PIV in order for an encounter to be mutually satisfying and qualify as sex? And that therefore if it was a good idea for you to avoid PIV for some reason or another (although I'm not sure that it would be very good as a STD prevention tactic since STDs can be passed in lots of non-PIV ways) it doesn't mean that you can't have sex?

I'm a bit confused.

Any woman living in an abusive situations should be encouraged to leave the relationship surely.
Not encourage their partners to stick it in elsewhere.

Which is rather rude IMO.

Women's bodies are designed as to feel pleasure with PIV (can't take that term seriously!) sex. It seems to me anti-feminist to be saying that something so potentially pleasureable is bad- Just another layer of shame to add to women's sense of sexual self.

But the biological function of hetrosexual sex is procreation. It's fun so we want to do it. So male orgasm in vagina is the defining indicator of hetrosexual sex. That's not anti-feminist, it's science.

(why do I great dragged into these things)

So, it's as I thought... the op's friend is a nut. And we should all be enjoying sex in whatever way floats our respective boats?

Ah, thank you.

So the OPs friend got it wrong then.

But Stewie How is PIV sex more limiting to female orgasm than any other kind of sex? Isn't it just that sex, full stop, should be about equality? (I'm not picking a fight here BTW, I'm really interested but don't get it :) )

So what is the biological function of hetrosexual sex then, if you are determined that it is 1) something different from "PIV" and 2) has a biological function?

Oh PIV Off will you [hgrin]

Oh, well then in that, I agree with you. I disagree, however, with OP's friend when she says that PIV equals sexual assault. I don't think that's feminism.

Now, what the piv to make for tea? :o

The more radical the feminism the less feminist imo. Objection to CONSENSUAL PIV sex can only come from either the assumption that women are too stupid to be able to fully consent or that women are obviously unable to want vaginal penetration as much as men do.

i would have said troll topic because it makes no sense but i have read the feminist boards and it seems pretty plausible there are people like this

the assumption that the male orgasm in vagina is the defining indicator of sex

I like "piv" but then when he pulls out and comes all over my face. Which I guess ticks the rad fem boxes as the chances of getting pregnant are reduced?

I insist that dh withdraws as soon as I've come. Is that OK?

TheBestWitch

Blimey! Took me a little while to read through everything.

Am now thinking that exploding at friend may not have been the best way to handle things. And a thanks to SGM for at least trying to explain where the viewpoint comes from.

Still cant quite get my head around the theory behind it but feeling much more kindly disposed since dinner, and perhaps should read up a bit and then make a more knowlegable argument of it. Had never thought about sex in terms of PIV or otherwise (nor even heard of it) until this morning. So at least I have learned something today :)

catgirl I think you have made the most unpleasant post on here today

and there is some very heavy competition...