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Original poster

to be upset with OH using cocaine

246 replies

maybells · 26/08/2011 22:54

we have been together for over 6 years and have a 21 mnth old ds. 4 years ago my partner used cocaine while we were at a friends party after i asked him not to touch it. we had a huge fight and he agreed that he would never touch it again or i told him it would be over.
when oh has a drink he is a complete sheep and just follows what other people are doing. it was my birthday a couple of months ago and we got a rare night out with friends to celebrate. during the night my other half disappeared to play pool. he had to walk past our table to get to the loo. he was ages and it made me suspicious. anyway after 3 hours i was so bored i went to go and find him and he had white powder on his face. i asked him what the fuck it was and the bloke he was playing pool with and one of my friends said oh leave him alone have another drink!
he flatly denied using drugs so i believed him.
i went out with a close friend who was with us that night and asked her outright and she was snorting coke with my oh and this other bloke. i confronted oh and he admitted it! I'm gutted i cant believe he did it and on my birthday of all days. I'm so angry how can i trust him if the threat of loosing his family is not even enough to stop him. i look the biggest twat now and he hasn't even tried to make it up to me or anything he just says "well i know your angry and everything has been said that needs to be said". how the hell do i move on from this?

OP posts:
exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 15:53

I am also slightly confused esp as people are now talking about petrol - what?!

I am glad someone else is. The thread was never about petrol, I was then accused of not answering questions about petrol! I don't see why I should go off at a complete tangent.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:05

I think some of you are being deliberately obtuse. At least I hope that is the reason that you are not following this.

slightly. I said

"Effect of alcohol is extremely complex I think.

From a biology POV it is a depressant (heart rate etc) but on the brain it has a variety of effects. It's very interesting. There's no drug like it. "

And you keep posting seemingly to counter this statement. Yet you are posting things that support it. I am finding it hard to understand what your stance is.

Exotic, you well know that I raised the fuel industry in response to posts wondering how people could support "evil trades". I still find your comments about DC not having access to clean water really crass, frankly. Examine many industries and you will find that they are causing immense harm. Yet you maintain a position that if it's something that you want then you are happy to support it. A very callous brand of pragmatism IMO.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 16:08

There is at least a call for other products. They are not polluting the water for inadequate personalities, with more money than sense, to get a kick for the evening. No one needs cocaine for recreation.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:10

Many many people do not actually need to run a car. Travelling on aeroplanes is, for most people, a lifestyle choice not a necessity.

Soft drinks are certainly not essential.

I could go on.

You need to look harder at the things you are consuming, and open your mind a bit.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 16:14

Try living in my village without a car!!!

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:16

exotic you really lack imagination and seem to have trouble reading.

"Many many people do not actually need to run a car". How does that translate to "all".

Is your argument really that terribly damaging industries are fine if what they produce is useful (according to your definition of useful)?

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 16:17

How are you going to get even bread and milk if you can't have fuel to get it to the shop?

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:17

Did you read my links about the niger delta?
Would you like some links about coca cola in India?

Do you basically not give a fuck about "DCs without access to water" unless you can use it to prop up what is a basic tabloid ill thought out blanket anti-drugs stance?

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 16:18

Sorry-the bread and milk on the shelves.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:19

Exotic people can individually restrict their consumption.

How are you not grasping that fairly simple concept?

Do you tell people not to bother with fair trade coffee as it won't make a jot of difference?

And your argument was that people shouldn't support this "evil trade". You are supporting an evil trade every time you fill up your car. But you don't seem to have even thought about that, much less give a monkeys.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 16:19

I am perfectly willing to boycott coco cola etc-I would rather get rid of illegal drugs first.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:23

People who do not want to fund the fuel trade any more than absolutely necessary take steps like:

Not fly in planes for holidays
Live somewhere with good public transport links
If a car is necessary, find one that is extremely economical, hybrid or even electric
Car share for work etc
Cycle
Have microgeneration at home where poss
Buy "green" electricity

And on and on and on

I assume you have heard of this? People do it because they worry about DCs not having access to water. It seems to be a new one on you though, the approach is that if you want to do it you will and forget the true cost, meanwhile other people purchase things that cause similar problems and you get on your high horse about it.

Glass houses and all that.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:24

Why do you want to boycott coca cola? Do you know what they have been up to or are you simply reacting to my post?

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 16:24

Let's just settle for me lacking imagination and not being able to read.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:25

link

link

Have a read.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 16:29

Then there's nestle
Clothing manufacturers
Drug companies
Cosmetic manufacturers

The list goes on. Basically unless you live in a cave in the wilderness, simply by existing in our society you are hurting people elsewhere.

My point isn't that people should boycott this or that - what people do is up to them - but they should do it with their eyes open and not take the highground on this type of issue ie the "evil trade" comments.

Tyr · 28/08/2011 16:29

Exotic,

You cannot get rid of illegal drugs. They will always be with us. Even in countries with the death penalty, they thrive- because people enjoy them. Accept that basic fact.
The best that can be managed is damage limitation. Legalisation and regulation presents the best approach for that; prohibition has been shown to fail and create a host of other problems on top of those caused to some by the substance itself.

slightlyunbalanced · 28/08/2011 16:35

Sardine I find you extremely patronising.

I don't have a "stance" it's impossible to have one over a fact which is that of the four groups of drugs, (stimulant, depressant, hallucinogen, and opiates, alcohol is a depressant.

It's not being obtuse, it does make me wonder if you know what the he'll you are talking about.

Tyr · 28/08/2011 16:40

I think the dispute over the psychotropic effects of alcohol is down to what is sometimes referred to as "the paradoxical effect." It is a depressant but, in common with others, reduces inhibition with the result that people may appear more lively, animated in conversation etc.... until they pass out.

slightlyunbalanced · 28/08/2011 16:46

Yes but while they may be more lively their speech will become slurred their coordination will go and their thought processes become delayed all indication messages going around the brain are being slowed down.

slightlyunbalanced · 28/08/2011 16:47

Indicating sorry.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 17:22

Slightly I don't understand

I said this

"Effect of alcohol is extremely complex I think.

From a biology POV it is a depressant (heart rate etc) but on the brain it has a variety of effects. It's very interesting. There's no drug like it"

And you are taking issue with it, despite posting something that seemingly agrees with what I said?

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 17:22

Or is prof nutt's take on it incorrect? In your expert view.

InTheNightKitchen · 28/08/2011 22:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tyr · 28/08/2011 23:04

I just want Sardine queen to tell me who prof nutt is........