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Original poster

to be upset with OH using cocaine

246 replies

maybells · 26/08/2011 22:54

we have been together for over 6 years and have a 21 mnth old ds. 4 years ago my partner used cocaine while we were at a friends party after i asked him not to touch it. we had a huge fight and he agreed that he would never touch it again or i told him it would be over.
when oh has a drink he is a complete sheep and just follows what other people are doing. it was my birthday a couple of months ago and we got a rare night out with friends to celebrate. during the night my other half disappeared to play pool. he had to walk past our table to get to the loo. he was ages and it made me suspicious. anyway after 3 hours i was so bored i went to go and find him and he had white powder on his face. i asked him what the fuck it was and the bloke he was playing pool with and one of my friends said oh leave him alone have another drink!
he flatly denied using drugs so i believed him.
i went out with a close friend who was with us that night and asked her outright and she was snorting coke with my oh and this other bloke. i confronted oh and he admitted it! I'm gutted i cant believe he did it and on my birthday of all days. I'm so angry how can i trust him if the threat of loosing his family is not even enough to stop him. i look the biggest twat now and he hasn't even tried to make it up to me or anything he just says "well i know your angry and everything has been said that needs to be said". how the hell do i move on from this?

OP posts:
catgirl1976 · 28/08/2011 10:22

In some countries homosexuality is illegal.

The legality of something is not necessarily an infaliable indication of whether it is "ok" or not.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 10:31

maiavan how terribly rude.

You said "So all those who scream about fraud with tax, looting, etc and yet defend illegal drugs are hypocrites." I was asking who these people are, as they are not on this thread. I also note that the people "screaming" about tax, looting ect are the likes of daily mail readers, who I suspect are not the country's foremost consumers of cocaine.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 10:33

catgirl , it is a shame that so few people are taught the skill of critical thinking, really, isn't it

catgirl1976 · 28/08/2011 10:36

It is SQ it is.

Maiavan you were rude to Saradine Queen in that post (in that you tried to patronise her, but didn't actually manage it), which was unecessary and uncalled for.

InTheNightKitchen · 28/08/2011 10:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 11:12

Slightly have you looked at the link I posted yet?

I said this:

"Effect of alcohol is extremely complex I think.

From a biology POV it is a depressant (heart rate etc) but on the brain it has a variety of effects. It's very interesting. There's no drug like it. "

Do you seriously disagree with that statement, even after having looked at the link I have provided and (possibly) gone out and observed some drunk people?

slightlyunbalanced · 28/08/2011 11:36

I have seen the clip before, I used to work for a charity where we went into secondary schools and taught teenagers about drugs and alcohol, we had a library of clips and DVDs about how different drugs affect the brain and the messaging system within it.

He is showing how alcohol affects the neurotransmitters.

People saying it makes them feel energised/excited whatever does not change the FACT that alcohol is not a stimulant - it is a depressant.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 11:41

Cocaine is an illegal drug.
Petrol is a necessity. Food couldn't get distributed without it, most people couldn't even get to work, people couldn't get to hospital, fire engines couldn't get to fires-I could go on and on and on. Life, as we know it, would cease to exist.
We could do without cocaine as a recreational drug.

he has dd18, ds12, ds1, and i found his behaviour immature and frigging irresponsible

Exactly-added to that unless you want to encourage your dd18 to snort cocaine with you it is sheer hypocrisy-you can't tell DCs not to do things that you do yourself-and if you are that hypocritical you can't expect them to listen to you.
Having DCs is the time to grow up.I would have thought my parents sad in the extreme if they were taking illegal drugs as 'recreation'.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 11:42

slightlyunbalanced

I said this:

"Effect of alcohol is extremely complex I think.

From a biology POV it is a depressant (heart rate etc) but on the brain it has a variety of effects. It's very interesting. There's no drug like it. "

Do you disagree with that? You seem to be arguing with me while at the same time agreeing with me Confused

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 11:45

Petrol is not a necessity for many many individuals in their personal lives, it is a convenience.

The idea that you, squeakytoy, are prepared to accept "DCs not having access to clean water" when it is something that you want, is awful.

You should face up to the reality of all of these global trades, and make your purchases with your eyes open. If you looked into it you would seen that buying cocaine is no more or less ethical than buying any number of everyday items that you buy.

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 11:47

It's just mind-bending, really, the things that people are prepared to overlook to feed their own lifestyles Hmm

TheSecondComing · 28/08/2011 11:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 11:59

How is food going to get to the supermarket without petrol? I think it is a little more than a convenience. Hmm

I would have it legalised and taxed.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 12:00

And in addition to legalised and taxed-only sold on a fair trade basis.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 12:01

Any profits could go to planting trees and clearing up the pollution to the water supply.

Maiavan · 28/08/2011 12:35

My rude is a bit like your bending of laws. Whatever blows your hair back is ok. Its mind-bending that people feel that they can decide which laws are ok to live by and which not. Im am pretty sure everyone who breaks a law feels they are right for whatever their reasons are. Very few acknowledge their guilt. That is called rehabilitated.

Coke is not just coke. Do you really think its grown on a lovely little farm then the nicest people sell it on and nobody gets hurt? Really? Because you buy it from a friend/merchant who is ever so nice and is kind enough to deliver, etc that it harms nobody? How wonderfully naive!

TheSecondComing · 28/08/2011 13:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 13:29

Of course it would be better. It could all be done fair trade and the criminals would have no place.

Jux · 28/08/2011 14:22

If it were legalised then they wouldn't be criminals, would they?

SardineQueen · 28/08/2011 14:24

maivan do you agree with the laws in other countries which outlaw homosexuality and legalise rape within marriage?

Presumably as such a proud exponent of upholding the letter of the law unquestioningly the answer must be yes.

exotic I am still surprised that you are able to ignore the harm caused by your personal support of the fuel industry. What about all the DCs with no access to water as a result? Or do you only care about industries causing immense harm when they are activities that you disapprove of Hmm I think you are being deliberately obtuse TBH and would be surprised if you have even bothered looking at those links about the niger delta.

Tyr · 28/08/2011 14:47

Laws (in any country) may be unjust and that is why they are repealed and amended.
It seems to me that where laws in other areas have become more lenient or been abolished, drug laws have become increasingly draconian despite clear evidence that the approach has been counterproductive.
Another factor worthy of consideration is the cost of the so-called "war on drugs" which has been an abject failure. If that money was spent helping the poor and underprivileged, particularly in those parts of the world where the drugs are produced, we might be able to regain a little moral high ground (and probably have enough left over to help those who wanted rehabilitation in our own part of the world)
Until 1968, there were estimated to be about 400 registered heroin addicts in the UK,mostly in the area of London, all of whom were able to get legal supplies of both H and coke from their doctors. Following a scaremongering campaign by the tabloid press (don't ya just love the Daily Mail and its ilk?) about one or two doctors over prescribing and selling the odd extra dose, the practise was banned and addicts forced to take methadone instead at specialist clinics.
Within a year, the Drugs Squad had its first ever seizure of illicit heroin.
Three years later, in 1971 there were around 30,000 registered addicts and the exponential boom has continued and that is just the figures- never mind the damage done by black market forces.
Go figure........

Maiavan · 28/08/2011 15:41

So you honestly think that drugs should be legalised? You have got to be kidding me! Have you had a child die from it? Have you seen what it does? Have you held an addicts hands and looked into their black eyes while they died? Do you think it wont touch you? I think you my dear, are naive! Carry on living in your little bubble!

SQ I live in a country that does not have the same laws as you so dont assume!! The drug trade is NOT homosexuality and nor is it rape FFS. If you dont understand the difference then put your rose coloured glasses back on and carry on complaining about how little tax this, how little you get, how hard done by you are.

slightlyunbalanced · 28/08/2011 15:45

Sardine - I am also slightly confused Confused esp as people are now talking about petrol - what?!

I think drugs should be legalised Maiavan and I speak as someone in recovery from addiction and someone who used to work with addicts.

exoticfruits · 28/08/2011 15:49

I can't understand why you keep going on about the fuel industry SardineQueen.Confused Unless you are self suffient with land in the country you would starve! Factories couldn't get raw materials and even if they could they couldn't distribute them. Farmers would be pouring milk down the drain-people could only get it if they walked to them, and then it would be cutting out the dairies and so would be unpasturised, cabbage growers would be leaving them to rot in the fields. If you have a sudden accident at home there would be no point in ringing 999, no one could get to you. Most secondary DCs couldn't get to school, shops would have to stay closed, if they had the goods the workers couldn't get there. Hospitals would close-nurses couldn't get there. How on earth can you say that lack of fuel is a minor unconvenience! Of course I support the fuel industry-until they come up with workable alternatives.
If it was legalised the criminals wouldn't be interested Jux! The money would go to the growers (fair trade). It would be imported and people could go to the chemist and buy it and it could be taxed.