The REAL Mumsnet Rules

[LoopyLoopsTootyFroots]

No bumsex on a Wednesday

Oh you'll be sorely disappointed!!

DS2 did go to bed earlier but didn't stay there long, currently dozing on my lap. I hadn't realised I was letting myself in for another round of Thrusty! I decided recently I'd prefer to be abbreviated to MsSteel but no-one listened

Wonder how far the thread will have moved on while I blunder about the keyboard with one hand?

Tit Gear? Starring... no, they don't need to change the presenters.

Wrong sort of tit though, surely?

I'm not prejudiced.

Is a 'word cunt' a really blunt term for a pedant?

Could we change it to "Wordcunts' Corner"?

Sounds like a beautiful Anglosaxon word for pedant, and as such should be used instead.

Cunt is, as everybody knows, a perfectly acceptable substitute for the following:....

Hague, May, Osborne , Cameron, Cable, and of course... CLEGG.

In fact, the fact that Clegg has one more word in it than cunt, and both only have one vowel, MUST have some kind of significance.

Yes. Most definitely.

What happened to Twunt??? I thort that was MNspeak in 't good ole days

Twat and Cunt rolled joyously into one

BTW - WHAT THE FECK DOES THE TEDDY SYMBOL MEAN AND WHERE CAN IT BE FOUND???

and... and... I'd like to think of myself as a wordcunt but can never be bothered to blather on about grammarrrr... a failed wordcunt.

A kind of wordage anti-cunt.

Pom bears were served at a dinner party wabbit, great thread.

The bear is just [ bear ] without the gaps.

Never ask about Cod. Or Moldies.

Agent! You're not supposed to go around explaining to people!

What have I done?

I'll be drummed out of MN for this

You've only yourself to blame.

I've never actually seen that thread before, so thank you Agent. My ribs are killing me now.

I have a multipack of Pom bears in the kitchen cupboard for emergency bribage and "I need the kids to be quiet for 2 minutes right now or I will scream" moments. Do I read the dinner party thread or not????????

I think, so long as you only give them to the children and not random dinner party guests, you should be ok

Arf at pelvics pebbly shit(s)

<a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?q=graph+spike&hl=en&biw=1146&bih=718&tbm=isch&tbnid=XuQzHLTYyvYS1M:&imgrefurl=blog.seattlepi.com/amazon/category/amazon-web-services/page/7/&docid=yiBt4vW9t2zkEM&w=400&h=300&ei=3yhQTsbxPI324QTXpIXgBw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=826&vpy=93&dur=696&hovh=194&hovw=259&tx=129&ty=131&page=1&tbnh=137&tbnw=183&start=0&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:3,s:0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">This is a graphic spike represenation of the sales increase of pom bears during the threads duration.

I read the whole thread and broke every rule except the no bumsex since it's not friday one while I did so. I almost changed my name to Je ne sais Bonkers, but can't quite work out how to do it, and DH woke up and asked if I was "reading that bloody sleeptalking man thing again" cos I was laughing so much. I also wasted good drink when I sprayed it everywhere! On the bright side, I have so far resisted the Pom Bears, but went to the fridge to check if the lonely neglected scotch egg was still hiding behind the cheese... it's gone!

I don't know Bonkers? I've missed something.

Thou shallt not admit to buy or feed your children Fruit Shoots or sausage rolls from Greggs.

The "je ne sais bonkers" was just one of the many many classic lines in delight that is the pom bear dinner party thread
As for Greggs, I'm from Hartlepool (cue monkey hanger jokes, some of which I may even have heard less than 200 times before and the standard line here is "what's the difference between a Greggs pasty here and one from anywhere else?"
A: The one from here has 2 toddlers and a pushchair hanging from it